Touhou's react to DEATH BATTLE
by memoyolo14
Summary: Marisa found a box in her house with something from the outside world and since she doesn't have anything better to do, she'll check whatever it is with reimu and whoever else decide's to come along. (it's stops looking like a script in chapter 7)
1. Prologue

_**I cant believe i'm doing this, yet i am for some reason.**_

 _ **So yeah touhou's reacting to Death Battle, i'm actually surprissed no one did this before me.**_

 **PROLOGUE**

Marisa was bored.

Gensokyo has been pretty peacefull for a couple of months since the makai incident.

Worse is that lady mima stayed in makai to further improve her magical habilities.

That means that she has nothin to do, she already went to the hakurei shrine to visit reimu and alice was prepared for her borrowing visit with an army of dolls.

So yeah she was flying to her home with nothing better to do.

Marisa:"goddamnit will a incident start or something i need aome action"

She reached her home and entered there was a big mess a lot of random things all ober the place.

But as much of a mess it looked she knew were everything was she does have some kind order, in her own way.

Marisa:"well maybe i could re-read those thomes i borrowed from alice a while ago, just as a time waster"

She said and started looking for those, she does remember where she leave them but there were no sign of them.

Marisa:"what the hell?, i could sworn i leave them near the reading table..."

Maybe someone entered her home?, or did alice came back for her books?.

Then marisa triped on something.

Marisa:"wha!?"

She fell face first on the floor, she rubed her head then got up looking for what made her fall.

Marisa:"the heck is that?"

It was a big box it reached up to her stomach in height and it was as large as her table, marisa didn't know how she missed something like this.

Marisa":what a big box, wonder what's inside"

Marisa opened the box inside she found, some smaller boxes?.

Marisa:"i think kourin told me once about this things, what where they called?, i think it was CD's?"

Yeah she was sure that it was CD's there were a lot of those inside the box, there also was a big black screen and a rectanular black thing.

Marisa:"so much outside stuff and it just appeared on mi house, maybe this is my lucky day"

If she rememers correctly the black screen is a television and the rectangle is to play the CD's on the television.

Marisa noticed a note at the side of the box it said.

"to whoever found it, use this for your enjoyment and don't worry about electryciti both the tv and CD player won't need it

from: Robert"

Wait what?.

So this "robert" just send this box across the hakurei barrier just cause?.

Pretty impressive.

Well she has something to lose sometime now, maybe go to the hakurei shrine and watch this with reimu.

She inspected the portrait of all the CD's.

Marisa:"Deat Battle, huh?"

[hakurei shrine: the next day]

Reimu:"so let me get this straight, a random box forcefully send her through the hakurei barrier appears at your house that has some kind of show that you want to watch with me?"

Marisa:"in a nutshell?, yes"

Reimu:"...whatever, i have nothing to lose anyway"

Yeah marisa came with the box, to watch this "Deat Battle" show.

She didn't come alone alice saw marisa flying towards the shrine and got curious for her it was like a puppet show that you could watch anytime.

Alice:"well let's go inside this intrigues me"

Marisa looked at alice suspiciously.

Marisa:"you are interested in something called "Death Battle", yeah that kinda sound's like bullshit"

Alice looked offended by marisa's coment.

Alice:"i'm not interested in that you idiot!, i'm talking about the outside's technology!"

Both of them looked ready for a danmaku but reimu will have none of that shit.

Reimu:"both of you shut up let's just watch this thing and be done with it"

Matisa and Alice reluctanly nodded they were a little scared of reimu to be honest but only one of them with admit that.

The three of them entered, marisa put both the television and CD player in the kotatsu while reimu and alice got comfortable.

Marisa:"so i put the CD in the player... then press the button on the television..."

Marisa put the first CD titled "season 1" and turned on the tv.

The television showed the image of bloody letter and flames.

 **"DEATH BATTLE"**

 **PROLOGUE END**

 _ **Before the reaction's begin, i need to ask something.**_

 _ **how do you want them to react to it?, yes weird question but hear me out.**_

 _ **should they react to it knowing that is not actual people fighting, or react to it as if they were looking to an actual death match.**_

 _ **also when the moriya's appear should i have the knowledge of the outside world being the same as ours? or that their planet earth has completely different media?**_

 _ **I'll wait for your answer.**_

 _ **so see you (as long as someone answers) next episode**_


	2. The best bounty hunters

_**So this is how it's gonna go.**_

 _ **if it wasn't clear this takes place a little after touhou 5 but before touhou 6, every couple of episodes i'll go to the next game and add some characters to react (not everyone is going to react to every chapter except for reimu and marisa).**_

 _ **The way the reactions is gonna go is, that the characters that appear actually exsist somewhere but the fights are just what-if's that really aren't happening.**_

 _ **(Death Battle belongs to Screw Atack and Touhou project belongs to ZUN ).**_

 **BOBA FETT VS SAMUS ARAN**

They just stared at the logo for a moment.

Marisa:"i think whoever made this was trying to hard with that"

Reimu just nodded, the spikes where a bit to much

Alice:"it seems that this performance will be... messy"

(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)

 _Wiz: The bounty hunter. Galactic pirates of living beings._

 **Boomstick:They blow shit up for cash.**

Marisa:"so like reimu's job but with actual gains?"

Alice couldn't help but snort, that was kinda funny.

Reimu made marisa and alice shut up with a glare, she was touchy about money.

 _Wiz: A prime example is Boba Fett, the most feared bounty hunter in the galaxy._

It showed a futuristic looking soldier in green armor and helmet.

Reimu:"All the galaxy?, i think that's an exageration"

Alice:"well reimu we are closed off from most things from the outside, so we wouldn't really know"

While alice is right, reimu still didn't believe it he didn't look that tough.

Marisa"pfffff yeah, i can take him"

Marisa agrees with reimu.

 **Boomstick: But don't forget Samus Aran. She's so badass, whole planets explode when she's done with them. BOOM!**

Now they were looking at a woman in a yellow and red advanced armor.

Marisa just rose an eyebrow, she didn't look like a woman in that armor

Alice:"how does she make green, yellow, and red look good?"

Aparently alice had something else.

Reimu:"...did he just say that she blows up planets?"

Marisa and alice minds just go blank after prossecing that information.

The both of them have seen pretty powerfull people but nothing that could destroy entire planets.

Reimu took it a little better.

Reimu:"... holy crap"

just a little.

 _Wiz: I'm Wizard._

 **Boomstick: And I'm Boomstick.**

Marisa:"so to put it simply this guys select two really powerfull and renowed people do research on them to see who wins, yeah i'm going to like this"

Alice was a little annoyed by marisa dumbing it down, because this was like her puppet shows wizard and boomstick were the narrators and puppeters the fighters would be the puppets.

Reimu:"huh, this could be more interesting than i though"

 _Wiz: And it's our job to analyze the weapons, armor, and skills of these two beastly killers and answer the most important question of all: Which of these two warriors would win... a Death Battle._

(*Cues: Star Wars Episode IV - The Death Star/The Stormtroopers*)

 _Wiz: Boba Fett is well known for his cunning, ruthlessness, and brute force. But his killer instinct relies on his diverse arsenal of death._

Reimu:"so in few words dangerous"

 **Boomstick: Plus, he wears the most badass spacesuit ever.**

They wouldn't know, reimu thinks that it wouldn't even block one atack, marisa actually thinks it's cool, alice would put more color in it.

 _ **MANDOLORIAN BODY ARMOR**_

-nearly indestructible

-micro energy shield

-penetrating radar

-protection from fire, poison, acid, cold

-retractable dinking straw

 _Wiz: That's no ordinary spacesuit, Boomstick; that's Fett's Mandalorian Armor, forged of nearly indestructible Duraplast, containing a micro-energy field for dispersing impacts._

Turns out reimu was wrong this could take a hit and then some.

Alice:"impressive still... why a drinking straw?"

Reimu looks at alice like she was an idiot.

Reimu:"for drinking, what else?"

Marisa started laughing.

Marisa:"hahahahaha!, good one reimu!"

Reimu just looks at her confused, marisa and alice notice this.

Marisa:"oh my god, you are not joking"

Alice just shaked her head, she can't believe this two are the one's that beat her mother.

 **Boomstick: This guy can have a freaking bomb blow up in his face and still walk away.**

that kinda surprises them a youkai could take something like that easily, but a human? not really.

Alice:"i wish i had some of that duraplast for my dolls"

 _ **WRIST GAUNTLETS**_

-flame projector

-fibrecord whip

-wrist lasers

-concussion missiles

-stun missiles

 _Wiz: His gauntlets house a flamethrower with a reach of 5 meters, a fibercord whip, and numerous concussion and stun missiles._

Marisa and reimu just looked at how alice got a notebook and pen from her doll, shangai that came out of nowhere.

Alice started taking notes, a little too pationally.

Marisa:"i think she is getting too many ideas from this"

Reimu:"i think you are right"

 _ **EE-3 CARBINE RIFLE**_

-fires in shor bursts

-scope-outfitted

-shoulder sling

-rock-a-bye rifle

 _Wiz: His weapon of choice is his EE-3 Carbine Rifle, an extremely accurate and powerful weapon which Fett often cradles like a child._

 **Boomstick: Yeah, I do that with my guns too...**

Reimu and marisa just keep staring at alice who was patting shangai on the head.

Alice turns towards them.

Alice:"something wrong?"

Reimu and Marisa:"nothing"

 _Wiz: That's... not weird at all, Boomstick. Fill us in on Fett's heavy weaponry_.

 _ **MITRINOMON Z-6 JETPACK**_

-hands-free

-up to 1minute of flight

-max speed: 145 kph

-magnetic grappling hook

-anti-vehicle homing rocket

 **Boomstick: Well, everybody and their grandmother knows that Fett can zoom around on his badass jetpack, but that jetpack also has a single anti-vehicle homing rocket, and believe me, you don't want to see this thing heading your way.**

The three of them had the same opinion of this.

Completly.useless.in.gensokyo.

 _Wiz: That's right, Boomstick. In short, Fett is a human Swiss army knife. He's killed hundreds of criminals, politicians and Jedi. He's even held his own against Darth Vader... twice._

They see black armored guy with a red glowing sword fighting bobba fett.

Marisa:"black cape?, definetly a villain"

Alice didn't know how a cape made marisa come to such a conclussion, then remembered who her master was.

Reimu:"how can you tell that just by a cape?"

Marisa gives reimu a flat stare

Marisa:"did you forget who teached me magic?"

Reimu just nodded, of course mima would know this kind of stuff.

 **Boomstick: Holy shit, that is hardcore!**

maybe?, they don't know how strong this vader is.

 _Wiz: He became leader of the Mandalorian mercenaries after the Galactic Civil War, and battled Mace Windu to a draw when he was 12 years old._

Alice:"battled way more experienced people when he was young?, sounds familiar"

She said while looking at the other two.

Marisa:"what?, jealous of our skill?"

Alice:"you mean that basic magic of yours?,not really"

Marisa just grinned.

Marisa:"that's because i don't need more than that to kick your ass"

Reimu couldn't care else about this, but they didn't let her hear the show so.

Reimu:"if you both ,don't shut up i will fantsy seal your asses into another dimension"

that made marisa and alice shut up they were also sweating bullets.

Fantasy seal is scary.

 **Boomstick: Sam Jackson's got nothing on him.**

Marisa:"who?"

Both alice and reimu just shruged they didn't know either.

 _Wiz: But with all his awesomeness, every so often Fett will totally blow it. He's fallen into the Sarlacc three times. Three! And the Sarlacc's not exactly running around looking for snacks._

They were shown a living hole on the ground with teeth and tentacles.

Marisa:first, eeeewwww!, second how did he fell three fucking times in that thing, because you know ¡he can fucking fly!"

Reimu:"... cause he is an idiot?"

Reimu couldn't think of other logical reason a highly trained warrior will make the same mistake three times.

Alice just did a facepalm, a very hard facepalm.

 **Boomstick: Three times? How do you even do that once? It's a giant hole in the ground with teeth, and he's got a jet pack!**

Exactly their thoughs.

 _Wiz: Still, even with his ridiculous flaws, Boba Fett is a whole new meaning of deadly_

Darth Vader:No disintegration.

Marisa:"surprisingly intimidating"

It didn't actually intimidate her, i mean she fought the god of makai with help of reimu, compared to that this guy didn't look like much.

Boba Fett:As you wish.

(*Cues: Lower Norfair - Super Metroid*)

 _Wiz: Samus Aran was infused with bird-like Chozo DNA at a young age, increasing her strength, speed, and athletic ability far beyond those of a normal human being._

Marisa:"... how does a bird DNA make someone stronger?"

Yeah she doesn't know how this works.

Reimu:"well it could be like a tengu"

Marisa and alice had no idea what a tengu is, they were about to ask but reimu told them that she will do that latter.

 **Boomstick: How do they do that?! I want me some bird DNA!**

Alice:"i'm staring to tink that boomstick is an idiot"

Marisa sarcasticly told her

Marisa:"nnnoooo, what gave you that idea?"

Alice just smirked.

Alice:"well he kinda reminds me of you"

Marisa:"... damn it i have nothing"

 _ **POWER SUIT**_

-shields entire body

-environmental protection

-easy to upgrade

-no restriction of movement or flexibility

 _Wiz: She wears the Power Suit, typically in Varia form, shielding her entire body without restricting any movement or flexibility._

Alice:"good defence and doesn't affect her mobility, a fine armor indeed"

Reimu just nodded not really seeing a point in armor herself, just don't get hit and everything will be fine.

Marisa:"yeah but she kinda looks like a dude in it"

 **Boomstick: Too bad it makes her look like a dude...**

Alice:"see marisa?, just like you"

Reimu snickered at that.

Marisa was just grumbling and thinking of how will she get back at alice for this.

 _ **ARM CANNON**_

-easy to upgrade

-power beam

-charge beam

-ice beam

-grapple beam

-missiles

 _Wiz: Her primary weapon, the Arm Cannon, has acquired numerous awesome upgrades over the years. Though, the basic Power Beam is a pea shooter with a pathetic range._

Marisa:"booooooh!"

 **Boomstick: But when it's fully charged, it'll blow your face off. BAM! Shoop Da Whoop!**

Marisa:"still worse than my master spark, but fuck yeah!"

Reimu and alice just shaked their heads in amusement.

 _Wiz: The Arm Cannon can also use an Ice Beam, a Grapple Beam, and a plethora of seeking and super missles._

That ice beam gave marisa some ideas for her hakkero but she didn't have any experience in elemental magic, lady mima never got to teach her that stuff.

 _ **SCREW ATACK**_

-powerfull electric charge

-temporary invincibility

-extremely fast

-namesake of an awesome website!

 _Wiz: Samus controls the skies with a powerful and speedy Screw Attack._

Alice:"can't help but feel we are missing somthing here"

Marisa nodded.

Marisa:"yeah like they are trying to tell us something"

Reimu wasnwith them on this.

Reimu:"who knows?, must be an outside thing"

 _ **MORPH BALL ALT-FORM**_

-1 meter diamter

-can release bombs

-jumping ability

-also called "maru mari"

-can access small or hard to reach places

 _Wiz: and if there's trouble on the battlefield, she can curl up into Morph Ball mode and slip away unnoticed._

Reimu:"just... how?"

Marisa and alice also wanted to know just what kind of flexibility you need to do that.

 **Boomstick: What the f...?! How does she do that?**

 _Wiz: Bird DNA, Boomstick. Bird DNA._

They are sure thats not how it works.

 _ **POWER BOMBS**_

-huge blast radius

-deals massive damage

-crystal flash healing ability

-deployed only in morph-ball form

 **Boomstick: Samus also has a freakin' huge supply of Power Bombs, which will destroy anything on the screen in seconds. Nothing survives!**

Marisa:"pretty cool, still no better than my master spark"

Reimu had enough of marisa braging about the master spark.

Reimu:"what do you mean "your" master spark?, didn't you copy it from yuuka"

Alice laughed out loud and marisa just glared at them.

Marisa:"why is everyone against me today"

 _Wiz: She is known to be the bounty hunter capable of taking on impossible missions, fighting massive beasts and even wiping out an entire species. However, she often makes mistakes. Somehow, she always seems to lose all her power ups and upgrades at the beginning of every mission._

 **Boomstick: Man, someone get this chick a purse.**

Alice:"oh, go fuck yourself boomstick!"

Reimu and marisa stared at alice a little surprised at her outburst.

Marisa:"alice chill, it's just a joke nothing really that offensive"

Reimu agreed with marisa.

Alice:"you two are okay with that?"

they just shrugged not really offended by boomstick coment.

Alice sighed at them, of course those two won't care about that kind of stuff.

Samus: Time to go.

Marisa:"samus totally has this in the bag, i mean she has better fire power"

Alice just rolled her eyes, it's always about power with marisa, but she was probably right samus did seem to have the better equipment.

Reimu was actually enjoying this, at first she though that it will be boring.

Reimu:"well since you are siding with samus, guess i'll take bobba's side"

She didn't really think he would win, but it was just to make this thing a little more interesting.

(*Cues: Metroid: Zero Mission - Title Theme Remix*)

Samus is shown flying through space in her spaceship. However, Boba Fett's ship, the Slave I, shoots at her ship, throwing it out of orbit and landing on Earth, where it crash lands somewhere in the middle of a futuristic city. Samus gets out of her ship and Fett hovers down to the where Samus landed.

Marisa:"kick his ass samus!"

FIGHT!

(*Cues: Star Wars Episode V - Attacking a Star Destroyer*)

Samus shoots her Power Beams, that fade out almost instantly, not even reaching her opponent.

Marisa:"whyyyyy!?, why use that!?"

Alice:"marisa!, shut up!"

Fett counters with a few shots from his blaster, but Samus jumps in the air, firing a missle at Fett, which hits. When she lands, Fett hits her with his flamethrower.

Reimu:"well bobba fett might actually have a chance"

Also marisa was too much into this.

Marisa:"come on samus do something!"

Alice:"she can't hear you marisa"

When Samus jumps back and shoots another missle, Fett flies up using his jet pack. However, Samus goes after him using her Screw Attack and eventually hits him, which forces him to the ground.

Marisa:"yeah! keep going like this!"

Reimu and alice had enough of marisa's screaming.

Alice and Reimu:"SHUT UP ALREADY!!"

Marisa blanched from the scream, and fell down hitting the back of her head.

She got up rubbing the top of her head.

Marisa:"ouch... sorry"

(*Cues: Star Wars Episode IV - Imperial Attack*)

When Samus lands, Fett shoots missiles at her. He then fires his anti-vehicle homing missile, which Samus escapes by going into Morph Ball mode and escaping through a doorway.

Reimu:"*sigh* looks like it' fett loss"

Alice and marisa stared questioningly at her, the fight was still going everything could still happen.

(*Cues: Unknown Theme*)

Fett cautiously creeps toward the doorway as Samus sneaks behind him in Morph Ball mode and plants a Power Bomb near his feet.

Reimu points at this.

Reimu:"see?, samus already won"

(*Cues: Unknown Theme*)

The bomb explodes and it takes off a large chunk of Fett's health. His suit having withstood the blast, Fett sees Samus and fires a missile at her.

Alice:"now he is just desperate"

Marisa was already throwing her arms up in victory.

Marisa:"YES!, in your face reimu"

Reimu shook her head, better let marisa have this it will be less annoying that way.

Samus dodges by stepping to the side and then freezes Fett using her Ice Beam. She then moves toward the frozen bounty hunter and begins charging her arm cannon. With the charge at its apex and Boba Fett's body slightly moving as he tries to break free of the ice, Samus positions her arm cannon toward his head.

Alice:"it's over"

Samus: You're mine.

With the charge at its maximum before Boba Fett could escape, Samus fires her Charge Beam point-blank, knocking his head clean from his body.

All of their eyes widened at the kill.

None of them could actually recall the last time they saw something actually get killed.

Alice"oh my..."

Marisa:"holy fuck!"

Reimu:"dear hakurei god..."

K.O.!

His head flies back downward, clanking on the ground.

(*Cues: Super Metroid - Main Theme (Orchestrated)* )

 **Boomstick: Holy shit! Did you see that, Wiz? That was insane!**

They recuperated quickly, they had seen this kind of stuff, it's just have beem a while since they have seen blood.

Marisa:" it was kinda brutal, should have expect it from the name on the CD's"

 _Wiz: Fett battled like a champ, but in the end, Samus' superior technology and athletic skill trumped him... hard. While her basic Power Beam failed miserably, Samus put her Chozo DNA to work by jumping and dodging around Fett's offenses. Boba Fett, who relies more on cunning and brute force, simply didn't have the means necessary to catch Samus._

All of them already noticed the adventages samus had over bobba fett.

Reimu:"it was onesided, but still entretaining to watch"

 **Boomstick: He was shooting all over the place, but that space chick was just too quick for him. He even tried to use his homing rocket, but anybody whose blown up a lot of shit knows anti-vehicle rockets don't work too well with people.**

 _Wiz: Exactly. Samus is about four times smaller than the average vehicle, so there's only about a one in four chance for a direct hit from Fett's rocket. Not to mention she kept moving, preventing Fett from getting a solid lock on her._

Marisa"it is in the name "anti-VEHICLE", obviously something like that won't work well with people"

Reimu:"also samus is fast, something like that won't hit someone with that kind of speed"

 **Boomstick: After that screw up, Samus managed to sneak around Fett and left a little surprise at his feet.**

 _Wiz: Fett's micro-energy field managed to minimize the damage he took from the power bomb, but by that point, it was all over. Samus froze Fett with her Ice Beam and finished him off with a Charge Beam to the face._

Alice:"i'm surprissed that his armor could take something like that"

Now she really wants some of that duraplast

 **Boomstick: She sure stopped him cold**.

Marisa:"...no, just... no"

Alice:"that was bad and you should feel bad for it"

Reimu:"why?..., it wasn't necesary so, why?..."

 _Wiz: That's right Boomstick. The Winner is Samus Aran_

Reimu:"well thay wa-"

Marisa interrupted reimu while pointing at the screen.

Marisa:"wait!, it's still going"

 **Boomstick: next time on death battle.**

The screen showed tha something was getting it in the dark then a flaming kanji apears kanji.

A little after that someone said "your soul is mine".

Marisa:"so..., next episode?"

Reimu and alice exchange a look then both turn to marisa.

Reimu:"meh, why not?"

Alice:"i have time"

Marisa smiles then gets to the CD player to start the next episode.

 **BOBBA FETT VS SAMUS ARAN END**

 _ **And that is the first chapter.**_

 _ **I didn't go super descriptiv with the imagery of the show because you already watch it, to not bother you with something you already watched.**_

 _ **Also i decided that the first time skip to the next game touhou 6 will be after chapter 3.**_

 _ **I'm still not sure what to do when the moriyas come but i have time to figure it out.**_

 _ **See you in the next chapter.**_


	3. Demon and Deceiver

_**update is here, BIATCH.**_

 _ **I'm also doing a quest on spacebattles called "Gensokyo sagas (touhou quest)", (probably should have posted it on THP but what's done is done) so please if you feel like it try giving it a look.**_

 _ **(Death Battle belongs to Screw Atack and Touhou project belongs to ZUN ).**_

 _ **Without further ado, here is the next chapter.**_

 **SHANG TSUNG VS AKUMA**

Marisa:"let's see what is the next one about"

(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)

 _Wiz: Street Fighter, Mortal Kombat. Kings of the fighting genre. And every good fighter needs awesome villians._

Alice:"more like a bunch of brutes that punch each other for stupid reasons"

Reimu didn't said it out loud but gensokyo is kinda the same thing, just that danmaku prevents the blood and dead.

 **Boomstick: Like Akuma, the ultimate badass of martial arts.**

A red haired "man" with a black gi with torn off sleeves, black skin and glowing red eyes.

Reimu:"he doesn't look like a devil at all"

Marisa:"probably just a nickname or something"

 _Wiz: And Shang Tsung, the sorcerous vanguard of doom._

Some old dude- no a young black haired man?, what?.

Alice:"but he was old, and now he is young, how? some kind of rejuvinating spell?"

Alice knew that youkai magicians didn't age thanks to their magic a normal like marisa could do it too.

said girl probably already did it but she wasn't sure.

 **Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.**

 _Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find who would win... a Death Battle._

Marisa:"huh they shorthened that part, nice"

(*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Old Temple*)

 _Wiz: Akuma, master of The Fist. Known as Gouki in Japan, he is a living weapon, ten times stronger than nearly every other Street Fighter._

Reimu:"so pretty much a martial artist monster"

 **Boomstick: Plus, he looks friggin' awesome, I totally want me some red, glowing eyes.**

Alice:"i remember my childhood when i wanted all my dolls to be dark and menacing, aaahhhhh... good times"

Reimu does agree with that dyin her hair purple when she was young was kinda stupid now that she thinks about it.

Marisa will **NEVER** put that purple outfit that lady mima made for her it was... just no.

 _ **GOU HADOKEN**_

-total control

-can fire multiple at once

-shinku-hadoken

-can be charged

-usable in midair(zanku hadoken)

 _Wiz: Akuma has dozens of powerful special attacks, including the Gou Hadoken. A powerful blast with precision control. He can even use the almighty Shinku-Hadoken, which is, basically, a giant fireball of death._

Marisa:"how the hell is he throwing fireballs?, they said he was a fighter not a magician"

Alice was with marisa on this one, what kind of fighter does that?.

Reimu:"he must be using ki or chi whatever you wanna call it, is like life energy or something"

Alice:"how do you know that?"

Reimu:"genji told me when i was younger"

When marisa heard that she asked something that has been troubling her for a while.

Marisa:"what happen with him?"

Reimu just pointed to the back of the shrine.

Reimu:"he's sleeping in a pond at the back of the shrine"

Oh, marisa though the turtle died or something.

 **Boomstick: Man, if I ever fire a Hadoken in real life, I'mma die happy.**

Marisa resisted the urge to laugh sure that hadoken is prety cool but once you see stuff like her master spark and the fantasy seal of reimu this didn't seem like much.

 _ **SPECIAL MOVES AND ATACKS**_

-gou shoryuken: "dragon fist"

-hurrican kick: "air slashing"

-teleport

-hyakki shuu: "demon flip"

 _Wiz: Akuma also uses the Shoryuken uppercut, a teleport ability, a swift multi-striking hurricane kick, and the Hyakkishu, A.K.A the Demon Flip._

Marisa:"that's not teleporting and you should not be able to fly by spinning and kicking"

Alice:"well marisa brooms shouldn't fly either but you use one and it flies"

Marisa:"shut up alice, those are completely different things"

Reimu was surprissed that these two hadn't started a danmaku fight, well atleast for now.

(*Cues: Hideyuki Fukasawa - Volcanic Rim Orchestral*)

 _ **SUPER ARTS**_

-shinku hadoken

-kongo kokuretsu zan

 **Boomstick: Also, Akuma's got tons of different Super Arts, but two really stand out. First there's the "Kongo...Kokuretsu Za... how do you say that?**

Everyone:"kongo kokuretsu zan"

Gensokyo **is** mainly japanese.

 _Wiz: No idea_.

Marisa:"wasn't he supose to be the smart guy?"

Alice:"he is probably just messing around with boomstick"

 **Boomstick: Well, I'm pretty sure that's Japanese for "Fuck You Up!" 'Cause basically, Akuma punches the ground and things explode.**

Announcer: K.O.

Marisa:"doesn't seem that pow-"

 **Boomstick: He shattered a whole friggin' island just by punching it. Holy shit!**

Marisa:"...nevermind"

Reimu was already thinking that this guy was an oni feigning to be human with the name of a devil.

Alice started to think that watching this will make her question life and how it works.

 _Wiz: But that's not the deadliest move up his nonexistent sleeve._

Akuma uses his deadliest move against a retarded looking guy in pink gi and he is probably dead.

 _Wiz: The Shun Goku Satsu, also known as the Raging Demon, literally means "Instant Hell Murder."_

 _ **SUPER ARTS**_

-Shinku-hadoken

-kongo kokuretsu zan

-shun goku satsu: "instat hell murder"

 **Boomstick: Man, I'm going to totally name my first kid that. The Raging Demon at full power is fatal, this guy's a frikin' onslaught of pain!**

Reimu felt really uneasy watching that move, she doesn't know why but those two are not telling them something.

 _Wiz: That's right. Boomstick, Akuma lives for one thing, and one thing only: fighting. He travels the world day and night searching for worthy opponents. He's an unstoppable human Holocaust, losing only once to his brother Gouken, but after a brutal rematch..._

Marisa:"...what the fuck"

She never had brothers or anything but that is fucked up.

Alice:"why... would he?..."

Back in makai she has a familly and this just made her be want to be with them again, to put it simply this was not right.

Reimu was prety silent, she really didn't know how to feel, her mother unfortunately died when she was born, she had the family pet genji basically as a father figure and as a mother the annoying gap hag so when it came to familly she didn't know how to handle it.

At the end she was just confussed.

 **Boomstick: Oh hey, look he can fingerpaint!**

Marisa:"that mother fucker..."

Alice just was perplexed by the coment, something is seriously wrong with him.

Reimu was taking the coment as bad as alice.

 _Wiz: It was rumored that Akuma sacrificed his soul to a demon in exchange for the strength to defeat Gouken, but this has been declared non-canon._

Reimu:"good, he has done enough stupid shit"

She wasn't one for cursing but the situation seemed too fit for it.

 **Boomstick: Akuma's got one major problem, though. His stamina is absolutely pathetic. He can dish out the pain, but he sure can't take it.**

All of them were still kinda on edge but were still watching this.

Alice:"so he has no defensive habilities?, seem's like a big weakness"

Marisa did not think that way, he may not like the guy but damn if he didn't have power.

Reimu wouldn't let anyone know that, she has that weakness too she got good at dodging for a reason.

 _Wiz: It's crucial for Akuma to have total control over the fight. He takes an extremely offensive approach. Always moving, always attacking._

 **Boomstick: Yeah, screw defense, Give me more ways to hurt people!**

Akuma: I am Akuma, and I will teach you the meaning of pain!

While there was no love for the guy, they could respect the strenght he has, reimu was sure that akuma will be the closest thing to an actual oni, marisa apreciated his fire power, and alice just knew that he shouldn't be messed with.

(*Cues: The Temple (Classic) - Mortal Kombat Trilogy*)

 _Wiz: Shang Tsung is the cunning sorcerer from Outworld, and scheming pawn of Shao Kahn. He's extremely adapt in magic and a well-rounded fighter._

Marisa:"huh a magician and a fighter?, weird combination"

Alice had shangai give her a notebook, maybe she could something for research here.

Reimu narrowed her eyes this guy was old and young sometimes kinda gave her a bad feeling

 _ **FLAMING SKULLS**_

-can atack in rounds of two or three

-fire damage

-swift and deadly

-unlimited supply of human scalps

 **Boomstick: This guy can shoot flaming skulls, which is totally awesome, but where the heck does he keep them? I mean seriously, how many skulls can a person carry around with them?**

Alice promply gave the notebook back to shangai, she wasn't into necromancy and it wouldn'treally help her with improving her dolls.

Marisa:"why skulls?, doesn't sound like a good proyectile"

Reimu didn't question it, she uses ying-yang orbs those aren't good proyectiles either but they work.

 _ **HOT ESCAPE**_

-teleport ability

-extremely fast

-wide range

-burns victims when appearing close enough

-sucker punch!

 _Wiz: Tsung can teleport around the battlefield with the special move called "Hot Escape"_

 **Boomstick: Wah! Sucker punch, bitch!**

Alice took the notebook from shangai, maybe he had more than just necromancy.

Marisa was looking at reimu while rubing her jaw, reimu has something like that but with a kick, contrary to what some believe physical combat in danmaku is allowed.( **A/N:** i know that how they fight in the fighting games is not canon but i don't care)

 _ **MORPHING**_

-can change into anyone he knows

-copies abilitie and stats of the subject

-enables hundreds of new strategies

 _Wiz: He can morph into whomever he wants, giving him tons of different skill sets, its like fighting a hundred different foes combined into one._

Well thats a pretty powerfull hability, a guy who could become as strong as other people with just knowing them.

Reimu knew there was something more to this and so did alice probably somethingnto do with his magic, marisa was just looking at the expressions of her friends she didn't know why they seem so angry.

 _ **STRAIGHT SWORD**_

-about three feet long

-secretly hidden

-of unknown make

-prefers fists and magic over swordplay

 **Boomstick: Man, I wish I could morph into anybody I wanted. I can have some fun with that! He also has a razor sharp Straight Sword, though he usually keeps it hidden for a surprise attack.**

Marisa:"didn't need to know that boomstick, and why have a hiden weapon weapon"

Alice and reimu:"for a surprisse atack"

Marisa's eyes bulgged when she saw reimu pull offuda out of her socks and alice had two dolls with knifes under her dress.

Reimu:"don't know what got you so surprissed, don't you have magical bombs under your hat?"

Marisa:"no i don't!"

Yes she does.

 _Wiz: Shang Tsung possesses one other strange, but useful ability. Long ago, when he was caught cheating in the Mortal Kombat tournament, he was cursed, by the elder gods, to rapidly age until an untimely death. The only way to prevent this fate is to absorb the souls of his victims._

Reimu was caught off guard by that, she knew of how to puriffy spirits, but never of **EATING** them.

Alice was a little escared of that just a little, she also ripped and destroyed the page we're she took notes of shang-tsung.

Marisa didn't know a lot about how the spirit stuff worked she was more about magic, but she is aware of how bad that is.

 _ **SOUL STEAL**_

-sustains youth

-restores energy and health

-gain's opponents memories and skills

-uses skills form morphs

 **Boomstick: He can literally eat your soul. Your soul! Not only can this heal him, but he gets the memories of the souls he devoured.**

(*Cues: The Soul Chamber (Classic) - Mortal Kombat Trilogy*)

 _Wiz: This helps him copy the move sets of other fighters when he morphs._

 **Boomstick: So really, his curse became his deadliest weapon. Good punishment there, gods.**

Reimu was facepalming, if gods really were like this it's a good thing that she never met the hakurei good.

 _Wiz: Shang Tsung has lived and fought for over a thousand years. His sorcery, powers, and brutal Fatalities are rivaled by few, and he's claimed the title of grand champion of Mortal Kombat several times, almost bringing about the winning streak necessary to allow Shao Kahn to invade Earthrealm, key word being almost._

Marisa:"he's over a thousand years old!?"

Reimu was trying and failing to discern how many souls he had devoured.

Alice:"let's never tell anyone how eating souls make you live longer, agreed?"

They all nodded this kind of stuff should not be comun knowledge.

 **Boomstick: Yeah, unfortunately for Shang Tsung, he pretty much sucks at actually accomplishing his goals. He's super powerful, but like most villains, he can never get around some goody-two-shoes getting in the way of global take-over.**

Reimu and marisa being the "goody-two-shoes" of gensokyo, even if they basically beat the living crap of everything that seems to be part of the incident, or when they're annoyed of someone.

 _Wiz: His only notable victories have included treachery and deceit. But, keep in mind, Tsung's not fighting any ordinary meat-heads. He's fighting demons, sorcerers, and gods, and even in defeat, he somehow keeps coming back more lethal than ever._

Shang Tsung: You... will... DIE!

Alice:"if shang tsung plays his card right he could win against akuma"

Marisa snorted at alice reasoning.

Marisa:"akuma is faster, stronger, and vicious tsung has no chance"

Alice:"but tsung has ways of dealing with that he just has to do it right"

Reimu:"i'm with alice, if tsung gets to morph into akuma, he woul have the upper hand.

Marisa:"well let's just see the fight and see who is going to win.

 _Wiz: alright the combatants are set, but before we end this debate i need some cash to buy rats for genetic testing._

Alice:"what?"

Reimu:"why?"

Marisa:"i should do the same"

The other two just gave her a stare.

Marisa:"something... wrong with that?"

 **Boomstick: What?.**

 _Wiz: from gamefly_

(*Cues: The Tower (Classic) - Mortal Kombat Trilogy*)

Akuma walks on the stage when Shang Tsung suddely appears behind him from his Hot Escape technique. Akuma jumps away to the other side of the battlefield, and prepares to fight.

FIGHT!

(*Cues: TGS '08 PV BGM - Street Fighter IV*)

Tsung shoots a Flaming Skull, which Akuma dodges by jumping over. He shoots two Gohadokens in the air, and Tsung blocks them. Akuma attacks Tsung's feet, and knocks him even more off balance by hitting him with a hurricane kick. and knocks him in the air with a Shoryuken uppercut.

Marisa was throwing her arms around like a crazy bitch almost hitting reimu and alice.

Marisa:"yeah destroy that old-er... i mean young-ummm...!,whatever just kick his ass!"

Alice:"stop moving already marisa!"

SMACK*

Marisa was rubing her head were reimu hit her with the gohei.

Reimu:"just sit and watch calmly"

While in the Air, Akuma hits him a few time and finishes the combo with a Shinku-Hadouken. Tsung lays on the ground and Akuma tries to finish him off, but Tsung transforms into Scorpion.

Alice:"why did he stopped"

Marisa:"i don't know but i don't like it"

She was about to curse at the top of her lungs but reimu will hit her again if she does it.

Reimu:"my best guess is pride"

(*Cues: Unknown Theme*)

Akuma stops and decides to see if this form is powerful enough to fight against, allowing him to get back up.

Reimj:"called it"

Scorpion: COME HERE!

Shang Tsung throws the Kunai spear at Akuma and drags Akuma over towards him. He uppercuts Akuma, cueing the "Toasty Guy", Dan Forden, to appear in the right corner of the screen.

Dan Forden: TOASTY!

All of them ignored that last part not really getting the joke but they didn't care enough to question it.

Marisa:come on akuma kick his ass already!"

Shang Tsung then keeps him in the air by hitting him with flaming skulls that burst out of the ground. Akuma falls behind him and throws him to right. He them teleports behinds him and kicks him, which Tsung blocks. He fires a Hadouken, but Tsung uses Hot Escape to get away, then reappears and slashes Akuma with his sword. He then grabs Akuma and tries to steal his soul, which heals some of his health and drains some of Akuma's.

Reimu:"humm seems tsung is going to win this"

Alice seems to be really smugh about it.

Alice:"see marisa?, just power can't win everything"

but marisa also has a smile of her own.

Marisa:"you are right but..."

Akuma breaks out of it by hitting him with a Hurricane Kick. Tsung runs toward him, but Akuma catches him off guard using the Kongo Kokuretsu Zan, which knocks him in the air. He then teleports over, hits him a few times, and then throws him. Tsung then lands on his feet and transforms into Akuma.

Alice:"but what marisa?"

(*Cues: Hideyuki Fukasawa - Volcanic Rim Orchestral Again*)

The two prepare for battle.

(*Cues: Theme of Gouken vs Ryu - Street Fighter IV*)

The two Akuma's then jump in the air and they attack, blocking each others' moves. One of the Akuma knocks the other into the ground. and then tries to finish him off using the Kongo Kokoretsu Zan. However, the other Akuma grabs him and finishes him off with a Shun Goku Satsu.

Marisa:"experience does"

Alice jaw slackened and her eyes widened

Reimu was also surprissed but she'll wait for wiz and boomstick to explain why akuma won.

As one of the Akuma's stands with his back to the screen with the iconic heaven kanji confirming the kill, it is then shown that the Akuma lying dead on the ground is Shang Tsung, who shortly turns back into his original form, releasing his souls.

Reimu:"that's... a lot of souls"

K.O.!

(*Cues: Street Fighter IV - Volcanic Rim Opening Version*)

 **Boomstick: Oh man, that was way too close!**

 _Wiz: No kidding, Boomstick! Akuma's raw power and speed pressed a distinct advantage early on. But Tsung's own cleverness and wide array of skills quickly even the odds._

Alice:"yes okay!, just tell us why akima won already"

Marisa:"someones angry..."

Alice wasn't really angry that akuma won she was angry that marisa was right after alice told her she was wrong.

 **Boomstick: It looked like Akuma had the whole thing wrapped up, but Tsung's morphing trick saved his ass.**

Reimu:"at that point it looked like he won"

 _Wiz: Akuma's pride for battle almost cost his life, as he stopped to see if his new face was worth a challenge._

Marisa was still miffed about that.

 **Boomstick: After switching up strategies, Tsung managed to steal enough of Akuma's soul for some extra health and new abilities.**

 _Wiz: But, it wasn't enough. In the end Akuma's skills as a fighter proved unmatched._

Alice:"how so?"

She already calmed down but she still wants a explination about the how he won.

 **Boomstick: I mean, Tsung loses to Liu Kang all the time, and compared to Akuma, Liu Kang's the nicest guy in the world. There was no way he could take Akuma's constant punishment.**

Alice:"well that's true..."

 _Wiz: As Tsung isn't used to winning anything on his own, he wasn't perfect on delivering the final blow, leaving him wide open for the experienced Akuma to unleash his greatest weapon._

Marisa:"see alice?, experience won him the fight"

Alice:"*sigh* i see... guess you were right marisa"

Oh how much it hurt to say that.

 **Boomstick: The Raging Demon of Instant-Hell-Murder-Awesomeness!**

 _Wiz: And so Shang Tsung fell once again releasing his devoured souls, again._

That still creeped reimu a lot.

 **Boomstick: Looks like Tsung's all souled out! Ha ha, get it, Wiz?**

Everyone in here just accepted the fact that boomstick will keep doing a lot of bad jokes at the end.

didn't mean they liked it.

 _Wiz: The winner is Akuma._

Marisa:"well let's see the-huh?"

Reimu and alice also noticed what marisa was looking at some kind of thick red mist.

Marisa:"oh come on!, an incident now!"

She really wanted to keep watching this stuff.

Alice:"well if it is an incident i'll need to see if my home is alright"

Marisa:"yeah you go do that, hey reimu let's just go and-"

Reimu wasn't here, she wen't outside and yep reimu was already going to do her job.

Marisa:"DAMNIT REIMU!!"

With that marisa took off, flying full speed towards reimu.

 **SHANG TSUNG VS AKUMA END**

 _ **Well this episode is finally done.**_

 _ **And a time skip too, so you will meet the staff of the scarlet devil mansion (yes flandre too).**_

 _ **I'll see you all the next chapter.**_


	4. Femefatale the first edition

_**This took way too long, and it will be like that for this fanfiction since this one is not my main project.**_

 _ **I'll still update it, just going to do it slowly.**_

 _ **(Death Battle belongs to Screw Atack and Touhou project belongs to ZUN ).**_

 **WONDER WOMAN VS ROGUE**

Two weeks have passed since the now dubbed "embodiment of the scarlet devil" incident resolved by reimu and marisa.

Marisa was pretty anoyed that she had to deal with that right when she was getting pumped for the death battle show.

She would have gone with reimu and keep watching it but in the incident she meet patchouli knowledge and her enormous library wich she has been borrowing from time to time to implement a multi-elemen master spark.

Know she is going with the box of death battle to the escarlet devil mansion or SDM, reimilia announced that she was gonna do a party this night and marisa couldn't find a better moment for showing the death battle thing to one of her friends in the SDM.

Said friends being flandre scarlet and surpringly hong-meiling, flandre was a good kid but she was pretty destructive, and she became friends with meiling thanks to flandre since both reimu and remilia let them deal with flandre when she losses it.

She was already here so she landed and saluted the gatekeeper.

Marisa:"sup mei, how have you been?"

Meiling notices her and smiles brightly.

Meiling:"oh!, marisa i'm doing fine, and you?"

Marisa:"meh, same as ever you know patchouli angry for the books and shit like that"

Meiling smirked at that, she was the gatekeeper but marisa only came to bug patchuoli something she was okay with, why? because patchouli always let's her deal with flandre alone, heck no one except koakuma and rarelly sakuya helped her with flandre.

Wich made her relasionships with the people from the SDM a little all over the place, patchouli thinks of her as lazy but in reality she just lets marisa pass so easily because meiling doesn't like her, koakuma is a good friend, flandre calls her big sis (something that remilia hates), sakuya is alway liking remilias heels and remilia herself liked her before but then flandre started calling meiling big sis literally replacing remilia from big sis to just sister.

Wow what a fuckfest.

Meiling:"what is in that box?"

Marisa smiled and just told her.

Marisa:"it's a surprise, so is everyone here or what?"

Meiling nodded.

Meiling:"yes, including cirno, daiyousei and rumia everyone should be here"

Marisa:"nice!, well let's go inside mei time to start this party!"

Meiling:"well i would bu-"

Marisa interrups her by grabing her hand and trying to pull her she fails miserably.

Meiling is atleas as strong as an oni what did she expect?.

Marisa:"come oooonnnnn!"

Meiling sighs and just goes along with marisa, because why the heck not?.

Once they entered through the gate they went inside the mansion to the dinning hald where everyone is eating, drinking or talking.

Flandre notices them and smiles like a child in a candy store.

Flandre:"marisa, big sis!!!"

They heard something crack probably the glass of whine of remilia, yeah she wants her status as big sis back.

Then it was remplased instantly most likely sakuya's doing

Reimu just nods their way and starts eating more fancy food, eating rice almost every day get's tiring.

And patchouli who was talking with alice hit's her head at the table probably because marisa is here.

The three most childish cirno, daiyousei and rumia looking start greeting and hugging meiling, if it's not obvious meiling is popular with children.

Koakuma waves at them and starts bandaging patchouli's head, because her body is ridicously weak.

Flandre gets close then notices the box.

Flandre:"marisa, What's in the box?"

This made alice and reimu to glance at marisa, both wondering why would she bring those here but decided that it wasn't that she probably just did it because she could.

Alice:"ah so you bringued those...what where they called?...oh right CD's"

Patchouli:"CD's?, so where did she steal them from?"

As you can see patchouli doesn't think highly of marisa.

Marisa:"nah, they just apeared on my home and we just watched them with the television that came with it, thesse things are surprisingly entretainnig"

Remilias:"entretaining how"

Marisa had gotten remilia attention, she got pretty interested about this CD's.

Flandre was looking at one of them and saw the name of the show.

Flandre:"death battle?, sound fun! sister can we watch it?!"

Remila twiched thinking to herself on how to get her status as "big sis" back, but also agreeing with flandre to watch "death battle".

Remilia:"Sakuya"

Said person just appears, even though everyone knows that she stoped time to get there to make it look cooler.

Sakuya:"yes mistress?"

Remilia:"prepare a comfortable room for us to watch this"

Sakuya gave a curt nod all professional and shit and dissapeared again... then came back.

Sakuya:"it is done"

Marisa was cursing that fucking life hack that was time stop (A/N: does she actually stop time?, i pretty sure i heard somewhere that she just accelerated her time or something).

Flandre, rumia and cirno where already celebrating in excitement.

Marisa:"this is gonna get good!"

/GIRLS ARE GETTING READY/

They all entered a big room, two big red couches, three small chairs and two thrones those last probably for the scarlet sisters.

Marisa opened the box in the ground ready to put them we're they could watch it comfortably.

Then it magically apeared in front of the couches.

Marisa:"... fucking time stop..."

Everyone got in their seats, in one couch we're marisa, meiling, reimu and koakuma, in the other one sakuya, patchouli, reimu and alice the chairs we're for the members of the recently made team of cirno, daiyousei and rumia and in the thrones the scarlet sisters.

Flandre:" come on!, start it already!.

Marisa just shook her head at fandres entusiasm, she was about to go and do that, and AGAIN it started magically.

Now marisa was glaring at sakuya so hard almost trying to destroy her with her eyes.

(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)

 _Wiz: Superheroines. Millions have been drawn to these modern myths of comic book lore._

 **Boomstick: Or you could, uh, just be drawn to the way they're drawn.**

Meiling:"what a way to start this off"

Alice:"you have no idea, what you're in for"

 _Wiz: Like Anna Marie, the Rogue_

In the screen a brown and white haired woman with yellow and green spandex and a green jacket appers flying.

 **Boomstick: And Diana Prince, the Wonder Woman.**

Then a black haired woman with a tiara, a really revealing red spandex,that makes her look a little too much like a stripper.

 _Wiz: He's Boomstick and I'm Wizard._

 **Boomstick: And we're here to watch two chicks duke it out! CATFIGHT!.**

Koakuma:"so... he is just the crazy-pervert guy?"

Reimu:"pretty much, but gotta give it to him, he can be funny..."

 _Wiz: It's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills-_

 **Boomstick: And maybe a few other things.**

Reimu:"when he isn't checking out other woman"

 _Wiz: -to find out who would win... a Death Battle._

Flandre:"yes!, start already!"

(*Cues: X-Men (2000) - The X-Jet )

 _ **POWER ABSORPTION**_

\- activated through contact

\- absorbs memories, talents, personalities, and abilities

\- temporary transfer

\- can use copied abilities

\- can be lethal with prolonged combat

 _Wiz: Rogue has possessed a variety of different powers over the years. For this duel in particular, we will use the most well known version; the original iteration from the comics and television show. Her deadliest weapon is her own skin. With just a touch, she absorbs a person's memories, talents, personalities, and abilities, whether superhuman or not, to use them herself._

Meiling:"so...bad touch"

Marisa:"and not in a sexual way, neat"

Marisa and meiling did a high-five, making sakuya eyebrow to twitch a little, she new of marisa and meiling friendship and she honestly didn't like it, she was sure most of the time that marisa got into the mansion just because meiling let's her in.

 **Boomstick: Too bad it knocks them out cold. And if she holds on long enough, it's game over.**

Patchouli:"her skin is parasytic in nature, that explains her gauntlets, not only that shesteal power and energy, definetly a dangerous power"

Flandre:"only you will look at the boring stuff"

Patchouli:"i prefeer to call it informational stuff"

 _Wiz: Tenacious foes like Juggernaut can resist it, but in the end, nobody is safe from Rogue's parasitic touch._

cirno:"why is that guy so big!?, what training did he take!?, what kind of juice did he drink!?"

Diayousei:"cirno calm down, he was probably born like that"

 _Wiz: For every second of contact, Rogue can keep these powers for a full minute. Though sometimes, there's unforeseen side effects._

Reimu:"like?..."

(*Cues: X-Men Theme - Hard Rock Remix*)

 _ **MS. MARVEL POWERS**_

\- super strength

\- flight at subsonic speed

\- near-invulnerability

\- enchanced reflexes

\- telepathic resistance

\- seventh sense

 **Boomstick: She held on to Ms. Marvel for so long she absorbed her powers permanently. Now, she's got super strength, speed, and near invulnerability. Not that I blame her, though. I'd be holdin' on to Ms. Marvel for as long as I could! Plus, then when she's unconscious I could...**

Reimu:"if she holds to someone a lot she gets permanent power, also boomstick that's fucked up"

Unfourtonatetly, flandre, cirno and rumia didn't get what boomstick said and they of ourse had to ask about it.

Here is a thing about youkai, even if they are older than they look like, that doesn't mean they'll act that age, flandre and remilia being a prime example of that.

Flandre:"what is he gonna do to her when-?"

Koakuma:"Things!"

Cirno:"what kind of th-?"

Alice:"normal things!"

Rumia:"Is he going to eat he-"

Marisa:"i a wa-no i mean mayb-ummm!, who knows!?"

Reimu:"damnit marisa..."

 _Wiz: She also gained a seventh sense, the ability to unconsciously predict her opponents' moves._

Koakuma:"kinda how meiling, can sense the Qi around her"

Meiling:"no, it's more like the mistress is able to see possible fates"

Reimilia, sputered losing all her composure in only a second.

Reimilia:"i have already told you that i control-"

Reimu:"then why did we win?"

In that moment remilia knew of the true meaning of humiliation, she slumped on her chair, with sakuya trying to reasure her mistress, and sometimes sending meiling a smal glare, meiling just scracthed the back of her head nerviously, while koakuma shook her head while smiling, patchouli just sighed in exasperation at the scene.

 **Boomstick: But her seventh sense doesn't seem to always work. That or the writers just forgot about it 'cause, uh, Rogue gets her ass kicked a lot.**

Patchouli:"what a usseless abilty to have then"

Marisa:"like your punches"

Patchouli:"mmmmmuuuukyyyyuuuu!!!"

She threw her book at marisa, it didn't even reach three feet before failing to the ground.

Koakuma:"i'll... just grab it"

 _Wiz: For plot convenience._

Alice:"sounds more like bad writing to me"

 **Boomstick: And damn, she's got a hot ass.**

Meiling:"uuuuuhh... what?"

Reimu:"just ignore him, it's better that way"

Cirno:"why is her ass hot?, should i-"

Daiyousei:"no cirno no need to cool it"

Remilia:"...what?"

 _Wiz: What?_

Marisa:"was that an echo?"

 **Boomstick: Hey, that counts as a superpower in my book, Wiz! But while she's not invincible, she doesn't have any real weaknesses either. She's a classy southern belle, who I'd like to take out to dinner.**

Reimilia:"that'll never happen"

Sakuya:"Obviously"

 _Wiz: Who can fly, lift buildings, and kill people just by touching them._

 **Boomstick: Never mind.**

Marisa:"pussy"

Rogue: Ain't that enough?

(*Cues: Wonder Woman (2009) - Ending Theme*)

 _Wiz: To the uneducated nerd, Wonder Woman may seem a cheap clone of Superman._

Remilia:"who?"

 **Boomstick: With Superboobies**

Sakuya:"why does he exist?"

Alice:"because shows of this type always need a funny guy"

 _Wiz: But in reality, she's a whole different story. Created from earth, born by gods, trained by ancient warriors-_

Reimu:"born by gods but created by earth?, how just how?"

Remilia:"some people just have it easy"

Everyone was looking at her.

Remilia:"i never said lfe was hard for me"

At least she is honest about it.

 **Boomstick: Maker of Wonder Bread! Designer of the Wonderbra!**

That got a laugh out of everyone.

Marisa:"pppppppfffftttt...hahahahahah!"

Koakuma:"hehehehe!, okay he can be funny"

Remilia:"hihihihi that was pretty good"

Flandre:"see marisa?, i told tou my sister laughed like a school girl"

Remilia:"oh shut up you"

 _Wiz: Boomstick, that's not true!_

Meiling:"but it was funny as hell!"

 **Boomstick: See, I can do it too Wiz!**

Alice:"do what?, a dumbass out of yourself?"

Cirno:"i think i should be offended by that..."

Rumia:"it's cause you're stupid"

Cirno:"yea-, Hey!"

 _Wiz: Wonder Woman is the incredibly powerful and near invincible ambassador of Themyscira, and self-appointed protector of the Earth._

Patchouli:"i think i read of a place with that name before..."

Koakuma:"i think it was of greck mythology"

 **Boomstick: And she dresses like a stripper. A patriotic stripper!**

Meiling:"i mean... he's not wrong"

Marisa:"aren't you showing your lega most of the time?"

Meiling:"that's different and you know it"

Flandre:"what's a stripper?"

Marisa and Meiling:"nothing important"

Flandre:"like my sister?"

...damn.

Remilia was sulking in her chair again, sakuya didn't know what to do about the situation.

 _ **MASTER COMBATANT**_

\- trained since childhood

\- skilled at armed and unarmed combat

\- prefers fists over blades

\- the best of the amazons

 _Wiz: Diana Prince has been trained by the Amazons as a master combatant since childhood. She dueled the best of the best for the right to be crowned Wonder Woman._

 _ **POWERS FROM DEMETER**_

\- superhuman strength

\- super human durability (resists all but blades and bullets)

\- magic resistence

\- enchanced healing factor

 _Wiz: Her unearthly powers are divine, granted by ancient Greek gods and goddesses. From Demeter, she received superhuman strength and durability._

Marisa:"Blessed by the gods to be strong, sounds familiar"

Marisa and everyone else was looking at reimu.

Reimu:"It's not the same"

Rumia:"true atleast wonder woman meet said gods, you don't even know who you are praying to"

Reimu:"that's... ouch, that one hurt"

Koakuma:"both flandre and rumia are very blunt people"

(*Cues: Justice League - Main Theme*)

 _ **POWERS FROM HERMES**_

\- flight up to mach-5 speed

\- superhuman reflexes (faser than superman)

\- super human speed (up to hyper-sonic)

 **Boomstick: 'And you know that bitch Mailman god with the wingy shoes?**

 _Wiz: Hermes?_

 **Boomstick: Whatever. He gave Wonder Woman the ability to fly and move at hypersonic speed.**

Marisa:"a mailman god grants you incredible speed... that sounds really stupid"

 _ **OTHER POWERS**_

\- they don't really matter so not even going to bother with them

 _Wiz: She was given numerous other powers from enhanced senses, animal rapport, and blessings of wisdom and empathy._

Reimu:"why so many?"

Rumia:"cause unlike you she is loved by the gods"

Meiling:"rumia, stop antagonazing reimu"

Rumia:"i'm just saying the truth"

Reimu had this gloomy expression in her face, she was pretty much told her truths by a human eating youkai, what has life become?.

 **Boomstick: Aside from the obvious cannons rested right below her neck.**

Paychouli:"he has nothing else in his brain, does he?"

Marisa:"pretty much, at least the guy is funny"

 _ **LASSO OF TRUTH**_

\- forged by hapheastus

\- unbreakable

\- infinitely elastic

\- forces prisoners to tell the truth

 **Boomstick: she's got a pretty bizarre mix of weaponry. Her Lasso of Truth is a piece of unbreakable string that, well, makes you tell the truth.**

Flandre:"i wish i ahd it, i'll put it in my sister and make her tel me if she eated my flan!!!"

Remilia:"i didn't!, you just want to balme so i buy you more out of guilt!"

Flandre:"you?, i though you sended sakuya to get it you lazy baby!!"

Remilia:"baby?, aren't you the one that has to get help from meiling when you don't want to eat something!!!?"

Almost everyone was looking at the scene of sisterly... love?, all of them a little uncomfourtable.

Except for patchouli who was staring straight at the television consntantly thinking, "let them fight for it patchouli, just let them get it out of their system", yeah she was the one wo eated the flan.

Hippolyta: What other depraved thoughts must you be thinking?

Col. Steve Trevor: God, your daughter's got a nice rack.

Sakuya:"seems like a waste to use that lasso just to find, the perverted thoughs"

Meiling had a shit-eating smile on her face.

Meiling:"perverted thoughs?, that makes me remember you when you were little, you were always star-"

She didn't get to finish because sakuya, apeared behind her covering meiling's mouth.

Sakuya:"i'm not like that anymore!"

Reimu, marisa and alice, were surprissed to see sakuya lossing her composure so easilly.

 **Boomstick: Hell yeah, she does!**

Koakuma:"i mean... yes she does"

Patchouli:"please don't go back to your succubi tendencies, it was hard to dealt with you the first days"

Koakuma:"i said i was sorry..."

 _ **BOOMERANG TIARA**_

\- returns after each use

\- razor-sharp edge

\- can cut through most substances

 _Wiz: She uses her tiara as a long range throwing weapon, using its razor sharp edge to slice open her enemies' throat._

Marisa:"why a tiara?, couldn't she get like an edged boomerang or something?"

Reimu:"because she felt like it, i guess"

 _ **BRACELETS OF SUBMISSION**_

\- indestructible

\- formed from the aegis of zeus

\- blocks blades, bullets, beams and other attacks

\- can discharge lightning

 **Boomstick: Wonder Babe here uses the Bracelets of Submission, indestructible steel gauntlets forged from the remains of Zeus' legendary Aegis. These babies can block all sorts of attacks.**

Meiling:"the times that would have save mw the pain..."

Marisa:"hey, i didn't master spark you to hell, so stop lookng at me"

Reimu:"i already said i was sorry, for starting with fantasy seal..."

Meiling:"are you reimu?, are you?"

 _Wiz: She has persevered throughout the years, fighting a huge variety of foes, even killing the Greek God of War, Ares._

Remilia:"so she killed a god no biggie"

Flandre:"what do you mean by no biggie!?, that's awesome!"

Remilia:"sarcasam flandre!"

 **Boomstick: Hear that, Kratos? A chick beat you to it!**

Marisa:"who?"

Alice:"no idea"

Cirno:"no matter what those two do!, i'm still the-"

Everyone (except daiyousei):strongest, we know"

Cirno was now in fetal possition, in her chair.

Cirno:"didn't even let me finish my thing..."

Daiyousei:"calm down cirno"

Wonder Woman bashed the edge of the shield down to Mad Harriet.

Wonder Woman: Let's see you smile now!

Marisa:"savage!"

Patchouli:"well as i see it, this fight will be decided on wether wonder woman is touched by rogue or not"

Meiling:"then rogue has this then"

Marisa:"what are you talking about?, wonder woman has rogue outclassed"

Alice:"hate to agree, with marisa but rogue is just no match for wonder woman"

Koakuma:"yeah but, wonder woman just needs to fail once and it' game over"

Flandre:"i don't care just destroy each other already!"

Remilia:"i really don't care who wins, but i'll say wonder woman she just has the adventage in almost every way"

Sakuya:"then i'll go for wonder woman too"

Rumia:"sakuya is a kiss ass"

Sakuya:"...shut up"

Cirno:"wonder woman wins, she is stronger"

Daiyousei:"i don't think that's how this is decided cirno..."

Reimu:"rogue is probably going to win, just if wonder woman screws up, and yes rumia sakuya is a kiss ass"

(*Cues: Rogue's Theme - X-Men vs Street Fighter*)

Rogue is shown flying in the sky. The Invisible Jet descends in background and Wonder Woman flies out. She kicks Rogue in the face, and both superheroines fly down to the ground.

Meiling:"i understand rogue's pain, just flying around attacked out of nowhere..."

Reimu:"just let it go already!!"

Meiling:"never!"

FIGHT!

(*Cues: Wonder Woman (2009) - The Battle/Origins*)

Wonder Woman throws her tiara at Rogue, runs behind her, and roundhouse kicks her. The kick sends Rogue flying, Wonder Woman then flies after her, kicking her multiple times before dashing behind her again and punching her.

Marisa:"see meiling?, wonder woman has more power and expirience, rogue already lost this"

Meiling:"Just wait, she will turn this around..."

She grabs a dazed Rogue with the Lasso of Truth and slams her on the ground numerous times, drags Rogue near her, and uppercuts her in the air. She darts around the airborne Rogue with a flurry of punches.

Remilia:"...yeah i can see how she is going to win"

Meiling:"Okay, that doesn't help my case, but you just have to wait a little more"

Koakuma"she is getting destroyed..."

Cirno:"you see?, she wins cause she is stronger"

(*Cues: X-Men Theme - Hard Rock Remix )

When she punches Rogue in the face however, she absorbs some of Wonder Woman's powers, she absorbs more of her powers when she takes off her glove and touches her leg.

Meiling:"hey marisa do you hear that ringing?"

Marisa:"i don't..."

Meiling:"because i freaking called it!"

Remilia:"goddamnit wonder woman"

Patchouli:"and just like that it's over"

Reimu:"she commited that mistake way sooner then i was expecting"

While Wonder Woman breaks free, Rogue strikes her from behind, elbows her in the neck, and sends her soaring with a quick kick combo. Wonder Woman throws out her Lasso of truth again, but Rogue grabs it, tugs it, and slams her on the ground.

Flandre:"yes violence!, Punch her more in the face"

Marisa was staring at meiling, no emotion just a stare.

Meiling:"yes i'm still working on her violent tendencies"

Alice:"doesn't seem like it"

Meiling got pretty anoyed at that.

Meiling:"Wanna do it for me?"

Alice:"no, no you are doing a good work"

Rogue flies behind her again and launches her tiara again, but Rogue blocks it, -propelling it back on her head- kicks her in the air and uppercuts her. Wonder Woman stops Rogue with several punches, but her finishing kick is blocked and she is knocked in the air.

Koakuma:"so rogue is going to win"

Marisa:it's not over yet!, i think..."

(*Cues: Wonder Woman (2009) - The Battle/Origins again*)

Rogue flies after her in the air, and is responded by a commotion of punches, Rogue blocks on of them and delivers some of her own, which is later returned back by Wonder Woman. She is then knocked down to the ground by a dive kick delivered by Wonder Woman. Both combatants fly down to the ground. Woman Woman dashes towards her with a flying kick, but it is interrupted by Rogue, who grabs her.

Koakuma knew what rogue was doing, and she was going to love it.

So does meiling and marisa as they get umeiling rushes at flandre and cover her eyes and marisa does the same with cirno and rumia, daiyousei had already closed her eyes.

Flandre:"big sis!, why!?"

Meiling:"no reason!"

Cirno:"wha!?"

Rumia"is something hapening?"

Marisa didn't know how a human eating midget, could be so innocent.

Rogue: Good night, sugar!

Rogue proceeds to plant a kiss of death upon Wonder Woman's lips, killing her.

Reimu:"that... was so unnecesary"

Patchouli:"why?, why did she do this?"

Koakuma:"BECAUSE IT WAS HOT!!"

Patchouli:"koakuma!"

Koakuma:"i couldn't supress it forever!!!"

Sakuya:"what is even happening anymore?..."

Meiling and marisa go back to their seats, while cirno, rumia and flandre try to figure out what just happen.

K.O.!

Rogue then strikes a pose.

(*Cues: X-Men (2000) - Main Theme*)

 **Boomstick: Woo-hoo-hoo! This goes down in history as the best DEATH BATTLE! ever!**

Marisa:"just tell us why rogue won!!!"

Alice:"someone's angry"

 _Wiz: Poor Wonder Woman was more than a match for Rogue, but then she touched Rogue's face._

Remilia:"why did that happen anyway?"

 **Boomstick: Wonder Woman is a trained fighter, so naturally she would strike her opponent's weakest spots, like the neck, stomach, joints and, well, the face.**

Remilia:"...fair enough"

 _Wiz: In the end, her failure was a result of her thorough Amazonian training._

 **Boomstick: And her stripper outfit! Her leg was just begging the be grabbed there. Though personally, uh, I might have grabbed elsewhere.**

Patchouli:"koakuma no"

Koakuma:"koakuma yes"

Meiling slaps the back of her head.

Meiling:"no, bad succubi, bad"

 _Wiz: Wonder Woman's powers may be godly, but Rogue's taken similar powers before, so there's no reason to say she couldn't here. Adding Wonder Woman's strength and speed to Rogue's own power gave her a huge advantage, drastically turning the tide._

Reimu:"so she can steal the power of gods... why not?"

 **Boomstick: A few high flying combos and our favorite X-Girl had Wonder Woman on the ropes.**

 _Wiz: And with her combined reflexes, speed, and seventh sense, she outmaneuvered Wonder Woman with one fatal kiss._

Koakuma:" _god so hot..._ "

Meiling:"koakuma..."

Koakuma:"yeah, yeah i'll let it go"

 **Boomstick: Rogue sure "made out" in this fight!**

Sakuya:"that joke, just killed me a little inside

 _Wiz: The winner is Rogue._

 **Boomstick: Next time on death battle.**

A walking mushroom and a turtles are shown... yeah those are the next fighters.

Marisa:"so... next episode?"

Remilia:"yeah, why not?"

Flandre:"yeah! mindless animal violence!"

 **WONDER WOMAN VS ROGUE END**

 _ **Well next they'll see a turtle and a mushroom beat the shit out of each other.**_

 _ **Just another normal day in gensokyo.**_

 _ **See you in the next chapter.**_


	5. It' back baby!

**Putting some though into it, i decided to abbandon one of my other stories to make time for this one.**

 **That means that "touhou's react to death battle" is gonna keep going!.**

 **I already have like half of the next chapter done, give me a week or two to finish it.**

 **I'll see you guys when i post the next chapter.**


	6. The basic bitch

**Here is the next chapter.**

 **I removed the screens that show an explination of certain abilities or equipment of the character of the death battles, mainly because you people already saw death battle so you already know what's in those.**

 **You all tell me if i should pull them again or not.** **Now let's get on with it.**

 **GOOMBA VS KOOPA**

Reimu:"i though i have seen everything gensokyo had to offer... and now i'm about to watch a turtle and a mushroom kill each other"

Marisa:"i wonder how is that going to work"

Everyone was asking themselves that on thier heads, how the fuck are a turtle and a mushroom going to fight eachother?.

Flandre:"whatever!, i just want to see the violence!"

Remilia:"flandre... can you calm down?, just a little"

Remilia loves her sister but she is too... eager, yeah let's go with that.

Flandre:"but this _is_ calm for me"

Remilia hates how true that statement is.

Meiling:"maybe you shold start the episode already marisa"

She did as told starting one of the weirders experiences in their lifes, and the have no idea that it would get weirder.

(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)

 _Wiz: The Mushroom Kingdom is a world that houses many strange and interesting creatures, like the Goomba, a walking brown mushroom with fangs._

Meiling:"we already know who is marisa betting on"

Marisa wanted to deny this but she couldn't gaining a few laughs for the group.

 **Boomstick: And the Koopa, that stupid turtle who always gets himself killed.**

Reimu:"sounds a lot like fairies..."

Cirno:"who is the one that kills them again?"

Yeah cirno just called out reimu, that just happened.

Cirno:"what?, need some ice with that burn?"

And it just keeps going, poor reimu doesn't know wat to do in this sittuation she was never bullied by a fairy, hell she was sure that fairies were incapable of doing that.

Rumia:"poor reimu"

Daiyousei:"she did beat me up for no reason..."

She just appeared in front of reimu to ask why was she beating all fairies just to eat a lot of 'fantasy seal'.

 _Wiz: Every video game has its share of basic endless common enemies, and you can't get anymore common than these two._

Remilia:"every army needs the fooder soldier"

 **Boomstick: But which is the best of the worst? He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.**

 _Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle._

(*Cues: Melty Molten Galaxy - Super Mario Galaxy*)

 _Wiz: The Goombas used to be steadfast allies of the Mushroom Kingdom. After years of oppression due to their low intelligence and short stature, they betrayed their own mushroom brethren and became the backbone of Bowser's vast army._

Koakuma:"that's... kinda morbid"

Cirno:"kinda like fairies..."

Oh yeah she is not letting that go for a while

 **Boomstick: The Goomba's main combat strategy is just to walk directly into its opponents. While this isn't the smartest thing to do, it takes some real "spores" if you know what I'm saying. Plus, they also have these vampire fangs, but they don't ever seem to use them, and... thinking about it, why does a mushroom even have a mouth?**

Sakuya:"atleats they're determined"

Patchouli:"kinda like you when reimu and marisa first came here"

Marisa and reimu remember that sakuya just didn't want to stay down at some point marisa though that she was somekind of zombie.

 _Wiz: When available, the Goomba will use the green Goomba's Shoe to get the jump on its foes, easily able to hop over twelve feet in the air. Goombas can also sprout wings, becoming Paragoombas, capable of barely sustained flight._

Patchouli:"that... how does that work?, magic?, mutations?"

Remilia:"patchy don't think too much into it"

 **Boomstick: And when flying, the mushroom thing can bomb victims below with Micro-Goombas. You know you're a badass when you throw babies as weapons!**

Alice:"that's horrible..."

Marisa:"don't you kinda... do the same?"

Well this got awkward.

Meiling:"oh god marisa, why did you say that?"

Everyones else was thinking the same but didn't voice out their oppinion.

Alice:"explain"

Her voice was colder than cirno after a human tried to bully a fairy in front of her, nobody knows where he is now.

Marisa:"you made dolls... you want to make them sentient... so yeah you do it a little bit of that"

Alice was going to deny it... but found out that she actually couldn't, her eyes glassed ove and she looked death now, reality coming down on her.

Marisa for his troubles got a small fist to the nose probably breaking it, this came from shanghai who looked quite angry.

Meiling:"marisa you fucking idiot..."

She muttered while inching the bridge of her nose.

 _Wiz: The traditional Goomba may seem a useless pawn, but these troopers have been know to accomplish the impossible._

Patchouli:"how... how!?"

Yeah she can't accept the bullshit that is the goomba.

 **Boomstick: Wait a minute, is that Goomba playing baseball? With no hands? Oh my God, it has telepathy powers!**

 _Wiz: Telekinesis? No, it doesn't._

This amount of dumb shit even got alice out of her past state.

Alice:"what the ..."

Patchouli:"i... mukyuuuuuuuu!!!!"

She probably got brain damage from that one.

Remilia:"I don't get this anymore"

Flandre:"this is weird, can they kill each other already?"

 **Boomstick: Well then how's it holding it?!**

 _Wiz: Goombas are unwaveringly brave, never backing down from a fight and always ferociously charging into battle without hesitation. Though, sometimes their stubborn courage can backfire._

Marisa:"Sounds a lot like little cirno here"

Cirno:"or like your necesitty to steal stuff"

Jesus, what's up with cirno!?, she is being a savage.

Meiling:"okay, cirno don't know what got you so riled up, but calm yourself a little"

Cirno nodded at meiling, who was wondering if cirno has a problem on how people look at fairies and the goomba's problem reminded her too much of that.

 **Boomstick: Yeah, you'd think it would stop walking when impending death is directly in front of it.**

Rumia:"mushrooms are retards, does that make marisa one too?"

Jesus christ kids are scary, they always insult in an aquarate way.

Meiling:"i told it to cirno and i'll tell you too, calm down"

Sometimes being the big sister of... well all the kids get's a little tiring.

 _Wiz: After dissecting a... voluntary Goomba myself, I discovered it's brain to be less than half the size of an acorn, proving what we've always known._

Patchouli:"so they are so dumb they ignore logic"

Koakuma wasn't convinced with this theory.

Koakuma:"that doesn't make a lot of-"

She stoped once she saw patchouli face, better to shut up before she dies in a horrible way.

 **Boomstick: Goombas are fuckin' morons.**

This time no one made the comparassion with cirno, sakuya though about it for a second but it didn't end well for marisa and reimu so better not to risk it.

Also cirno was looking at her like expecting her to say something.

(*Cues: New Super Mario Bros. Wii - Castle Theme*)

 _Wiz: Bowser's second most common foot soldier is the Koopa Troopa, the Turtle Warrior._

Sakuya:"his foot soldiers are mushrooms and turtles i shouldn't expect a lot about this bowser"

 **Boomstick: Like Ninja Turtles!?**

Flandre:"... that sounds amazing!"

 _Wiz: No, not Ninja Turtles._

Flandre:"bbboooooo!!!!!"

 **Boomstick: Awh...**

 _Wiz: While the Goombas are the backbone, the Koopas are prevalent enough to have Bowser's army named the "Koopa Troop"._

Rumia:"hey... if they are technically in a higher possition than goombas, shouldn't the koopas be stronger?"

Alice:"maybe?..."

 **Boomstick: Koopas have their own set of Paratroopa wings that can fly for several minutes with no problem.**

Marisa:"sure give anything wings and it can fly inmidiatly"

Alice:"don't you fly on a broom?"

Marisa decided to not answer her question.

 _Wiz: Koopas are also fairly skilled in Tennis, Baseball, Basketball and Go-kart driving._

Flandre:"that doesn't sound very deadly"

Koakuma:"atleast it probes to be smarter than the goomba"

 **Boomstick: Are you sure it's not a Ninja Turtle?**

 _Wiz: Their best offence is also their finest defense, the Koopa shell, made of a tough steel-like substance capable of withstanding over 200 pounds of pressure._

Meiling:"kinda impressive... just kinda"

She was sure that if she hitted it she will probably break the shell, atleast it was sturdier than your avarage shield.

 **Boomstick: As an offensive weapon, the Koopa shell can destroy almost anything. It's a living torpedo of pain!**

Reimu:"interesting choice for a proyectile"

Rumia:"because ying-yang orbs make so much sense"

Reimu is starting to consider just beating the crap out of this kids then remembered that it would mean they won for getting the better of her.

She hates this, a lot.

 _Wiz: There seems to be a common misconception that it takes Mario two hits to kill a Koopa. Actually, it only takes one. There just happens to be this durable shell in the way. However, this leads to the Koopa's greatest weakness. When Mario jumps on a Koopa's back, rather than retaliating, it retreats into its shell. Why?_

 **Boomstick: 'Cause they're a bunch of pussies!**

Daiyousei:"not... really i usually see a lot of fairies that do the same because dying os a horrible expeience... the endless void that we fairies see when we die... just because we can come back... where nobody can hear us, then they lose their minds and well they lose a lot f brain power"

Well that's fucked up, almost everyone was looking away from her aside from meiling, koakuma, remilia, patchouli, rumia and cirno.

Meiling was glad to be so good with kids that she always managed to persuade the fairies of leaving the SDM alone.

Patchouli feels good about not being part of what's technically genocide.

Koakuma likes her job even more than before.

Cirno and rumia rarelly even do anything to fairies since unless the fairies are three very specific trio.

And believe it or not remilia is actually really nice to everyone in the mansion including the fairy maids, yeah she is actually good at keeping the SDM in a good state, and you people though that all that was sakuya.

Sakuya will literally plug a knife into anything that fails to do a job as good as she would do it, and with her ridicolous high standards remila decided that it was better if meiling and her should dealt with the fairy maids.

Or when marisa will just blast them because they were on sight and she was just in the mood.

Or when reimu needed someone to get her frustrasions about the amount of money she uses to live.

Or when alice chucks a army of dolls because they were playing close to her home.

Yeah better keep going with the show.

 _Wiz: That's right, Boomstick. The Koopas are cowards, afraid to face a dangerous foe. Some run from danger but most just hide in their thick shell._

The room is still kinda silent after what daiyousei said.

 **Boomstick: Then again, if I were carrying an impenetrable fortress on my back and some large Italian man was trying to murder me, I'd probably hide in it too.**

Sakuya:"what an interesting mental image that is..."

Yes she of all people is trying to bring up the mood, now you know how bad this actually is.

 _Wiz: But you'd think as soon as Mario picked up the shell, it would a perfect time to counterattack, right? And even when they're flying after a good kick, they refuse to stick their feet out and stop themselves._

Daiyousei:"not everyone has it in themselves to try to fight your would be murderer"

Because if someone tries to kill you either run or fight.

 **Boomstick: Well... eh... ah, yeah, you're right, they're bitches.**

(*Cues: Super Marioland Theme - Remix*)

Marisa paussed the video.

Marisa:"so... let's things calm a little before we continue"

Yeah they just found out that they literally are the main reason of fairy stupidity, well not all of them but they still need time to process that information.

The Koopa emerges from a Warp Pipe and calmly walks through the field. When he meets the Goomba, he stops.

FIGHT!

(*Cues: King Bowser - Super Mario Galaxy*)

The Koopa and the Goomba both sprout wings, becoming the Paratroopa and the Paragoomba. They take to the air and fly into each other 4 times.

Meiling:"this is more than i expected from them"

Marisa:"yeah, i though they'll just run into each other by now"

After flying in a circle, the Koopa tries to hit the Goomba by doing something similar to the Spindash from Sonic the Hedgehog, but misses.

Koakuma:"that attack seems counter productive"

Remilia:"it's because it is"

As the Goomba smiles, the Koopa ricochets of a wall and hits the Goomba, who falls under a Thwomp, which he manages to avoid, He also avoids 3 more Thwomps but gets hit again by the Koopa, who is squashed under a fifth Thwomp.

Marisa:"living cinderblocks, because reasons"

Patchouli:"what a weird... speciment"

The Goomba lands near a cannon, followed by the Koopa. As they both fly up, the cannons fire at them both.

Reimu:"danmaku flashbacks..."

Flandre:"i wonder if we can put cannons in the mansion..."

Remilia now had to deall with her sister wanting cannons in the mansion, she is going to need meiling for this one.

As they dodge the cannonballs and Bullet Bills, they trade a few blows. The Koopa tries to hit the Goomba using the trick he tried earlier, but mises and continuously ricochets of the walls again.

Remilia:"yeah because that worked the first time"

When he stops, 6 Bullet Bills fly up, but the Goomba stops them by dropping Micro-Goombas onto them.

Alice:"... not like them"

Marisa decided to not say anything about that fearing another punch from shanghai.

After dodging 2 more Bullet Bills, the Goomba and Koopa are high in the air. As they fly into each other some more, the Angry Sun attacks the Goomba and the Koopa. While the Koopa successfully evades the Sun, the Goomba is hit and loses his wings.

Patchouli:"so everything is just alive there, even the sun"

Patchouli was geting a migraine put of shear stupidity.

Luckily, he lands in a Kuribo's Shoe. As the Koopa descends, the Goomba hops towards his opponent in the shoe. The Koopa hides under a line of breakable blocks as the Goomba hops on the Blocks above him.

Cirno:"look at the mind games..."

Rumia:"isn't the koopa the smarter one?"

The Koopa tries to escape by flying to the right then quickly flying into the pipe, but the Goomba hits the Koopa, knocking him into the Pipe.

Rumia:"nevermind"

Daiyousei:"guess the goomba is smarter"

The Goomba hops after the Koopa, but gets attacked by a Piranha Plant emerging from the pipe.

Daiyousei:"nevermind..."

The Koopa (who lost his wings from the attack) come out the other end of the pipe, to meet a group of Red Goombas who live underground. The Goomba appears and hits the Koopa, causing him to hide in his shell.

Marisa:"after all of that... he get's scared by someone hopping in his shell"

Reimu:"pussy"

As the Red Goombas dance victoriously, the Goomba spots a pool of Lava near the Koopa.

So did flandre for some reason.

The Red Goombas continue to dance as the Goomba advances towards the Koopa and kicks him, causing him to slide towards the lava. Luckily, the pool of Lava is small enough for the Koopa to slide over it and hit a block, causing him to slide into the Goomba and the Red Goombas. Unfortunately, he also slides into a much larger pool of Lava, reducing him to a skeleton (Dry Bones).

Cirno:"...so who won?"

Double K.O.!

Cirno:"fair enough"

(*Cues: Desolate Path - Super Mario 64*)

 **Boomstick: Oh man, I thought this was gonna suck! That was awesome! Who knew those little fuckers could fight like that?**

Sakuya:"no one?, you did made them seem pathetic"

 _Wiz: The Goomba's arsenal proved effective enough, but its own stupidity became its downfall._

No one made a jab at cirno fearing that they would get humilaed just like reimu did and marisa did.

 **Boomstick: Then the Koopa wussed out and kept to the safety of his shell, not stopping in time to avoid the Giant Pool of Lava Death.**

Cirno:"and they call me stupid..."

 _Wiz: Even the Koopa's tough shell can't protect it from fire._

Marisa:"no shit"

 **Boomstick: You might say this battle really heated up in the end.**

Alice:"that... was not as bad as i though it would be"

Koakuma:"like a 6/10"

 _Wiz: This battle is a Draw_

 **Boomstick: Next time on death battle.** Two incredibly muscled up men appaered on scree, a battle of machos.

While koakuma was imaginating herself in a certain... situattion between thos two everyone else were bussy doing something else.

Marisa:"was that guy piledriving a shark?"

Flandre:"yes he was..."

Meiling:"next episode now"

Marisa started preparing the next episode.

 **GOOMBA VS KOOPA END**

 **And that's it.**

 **Fairies have it bad, getting killed for just abou everything lie flies.**

 **Cirno roasting the main characters of the series.**

 **More on that on the next chapter!.**


	7. Maximum testosterone

**I'M BACK BABYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!.**

 **And the writting no longer looks like a baddly-written script now it's a baddly-written story, and my grammar still sucks but i like to think i'm getting better.**

 **Now i feel like i have to tell you all why this took so long and while i mentioned it in "the (kinda) devil hero i never did it here so here is the shortened version.**

 **My tablet blew the fuck up, losed a chapter from this fic and the other one had to wait for this laptop that's shitty and doesn't even have a battery i had to writte this thing all over again and now we are here.**

 **Sorry for the wait and (probably) enjoy**.

 **ZANGIEF VS HAGGAR**

"okay, the next episode is going to be about shirtless men wrestling each other... meiling keep an eye on koakuma" marisa said already knowing how koakuma is.

said meiling who was giving koakuma side glances to keep an eye on her

This was what is happening right now, marisa and all the residents of the SDM were very wary of how koakuma would react to all of this.

"oh come on!, i won't do anything bad..." she said a little annoyed at everyone.

Nobody believed that, not even koakuma herself but can you blame her?, who woul-

Then she got slaped in the back of the head with a book, courtesy of pathchouli.

Patchouli who was staring at her blankly "no, i know what you are thinking, bad sexual powered demon" she deadpanned

Koakuma had mixed feelings about being talked like a dog, on one side she was being humilated in the other side she was being humilated.

wonder what that says about her?.

(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)

 _Wiz: Capcom has produced hundreds of deadly warriors, but few can best these two hulking leviathans._

 **Boomstick: Haggar, the mayor elect of whoop ass.**

That got meiling's attention "is boomstick being respectfull?".

Sakuya answered "yes...he is" she was a little surprissed by that she expected boomstick to be alway disrecpectfull of everyone.

 _Wiz: And Zangief, Russia's red Cyclone._

 **Boomstick: These two wrestlers have never met in person but their rivalry is legendary and it's about time they duked it out!.**

Cirno didn't know how that worked so she decided to ask "how does that work?".

Alice decided to answer her question "it means that people that know about them want them to fight".

"oh, thanks" said cirno to alice with a small smile.

 _Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick, and it's our job to analyse their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle._

(*Cues: Muscle Bomber/Saturday Night Slam Masters - Mike Haggar (Original CPS1 Arcade Version*)

 **Boomstick: Standing 6 foot 7 and weighing 266 pounds - 30 of which is probably in his manly mustache - it's Mike Haggar!**

Reimu really didn't believe that fact about haggar's mustache weight but she still gave her opinnion "that's some heavy hair...".

 _Wiz: For many years, Haggar was a champion wrestler of Slam Masters until being elected mayor of Metro city, a metropolis overrun with street gangs._

Well now this got reimu's attention haggar seemed to deal with problem people, just like herself.

 **Boomstick: Too bad there aren't more badasses in office. Most mayors would just put up laws against crime or increase the police force but Mike takes matters into his own hands.**

"if only the chief of the village was like this guy..." said reimu wistfully, really keine was more the leader of the human village than the chief himself that guy is very unpleasant.

"yeah that's never going to happen" marisa rebutted having meetthe chief herself when she left the village to learn magic, hegave her a lecture that she didn't listen to then told him that she was going to kick his ass if he didn't shuted up he did so instantly literally beging for his life.

Rumia know's about that guy too he pissed himself the first time she meet him and she didn't even showed her teeth to him.

 _Wiz: Haggar is a former pro American wrestler, specializing in grabs, holds and quick strikes. He's of Scottish ancestry and proud of it, even having a scottish flag on his gym. It's likely he has also trained in Scottish backhold wrestling, which involves bearhugging an opponent and keeping your balance while overpowering theirs._

Meiling nodded aprovingly, she really preffered her chinese martial-arts but she wouldn't deny that haggar's type of wrestling seemed incredible.

 **Boomstick: Haggar's got a devastating moveset ranging from Suplexes, Body Splashes, and his own invention: the Spinning clothesline double lariat, which Zangief stole for his own use. To even the score, Haggar copied Gief's spinning piledriver. When Haggar isn't overpowering people with his pure manliness, his weapon of choice is a blunt pipe. Hey, he's a mayor that kicks ass and recycles!**

"yeah he is very manly..." koakuma said her voice giving away her thoughs wich got her another slap in the back of her head courtesy of patchouly

The fairy duo of the group already respected the guy he is strong and recycles? he is good on their book.

(*Cues: Unknown Theme*)

 _Wiz: Even after his victorious election, Haggar continued his vigorous training._

 **Boomstick: By piledriving sharks!**

Meiling had done some hardcore training herself... but piledriving sharks? that's a new one maybe she should try it the mansion does have a pool...

Sakuya noticed this and quickly shot down the idea "no meiling we are not putting sharks in the pool for you to train with".

Unfurtonatly flandre was okay with the sharks "but sakuya!!!! i want to see meiling piledriving sharks!".

Sakuya looked at remilia for help to her growing dread she just waved her hand lazily "don't worry sakuya we don't even use that pool for anything important".

Yes the maid knew that, why vampires would have a pool considering that they're weak against water eluded her but it wasn't her job to question it, but she let a little anger shown when she saw meiling pumping her fist in victory.

 _Wiz: It appears Haggar wrestles Bull Sharks, one of the deadliest sharks on Earth. These can grow up to 11 feet long and weigh up to 500 pounds. Wrestling these proves Haggar's proficiency in the Scottish backhold, as he keeps his balance against the thrashing sharks until he can piledrive them into the beach._

Patchouli was somewhat surprissed by this little humans have that kind of physical strenght, and he got it just by training? impressive.

And koakuma wanted to be her training partner, after all wrestling is all about getting close and intimate...

"koakuma..." she heard the voice of alice who noticed her expression.

 **Boomstick: Next Jaws movie needs more Haggar!**

"the hell is a jaws?" asked marisa.

"most likely a type of shark" said patchouli who threw a wild guess of what a jaws is

 _Wiz: Unfortunately, during his time as mayor, Haggar was undoubtedly forced to prioritize politics over training. It's likely he didn't have much time to learn new techniques or train against many other wrestlers. As a result, he uses moves and skills from an older era._

Remilia knew of this issue when the mansion was first created she loosed a lot of time keeping everything in check with her sister being in a... foul mood in those time's, it was really troublesome but with time she meet her friend patchouli found meiling and sakuya stumbled into the mansion and she found herself with a easier time handling the mansion.

"being a leader ain't easy..." the vampire wispered to herself.

Patchouli recognised the look on her friend's face, asked "remembering old times?" there was something in her voice that didn't appear often and that was mischief.

"screw you patchy, you don't know how those 100 years handling the mansion where for me..." she just slept and worked in those times no time for the fun stuff that vampire's do, not even one vampire hunter it was fucking BORING and STRESSFULL.

 **Boomstick: But they seem to work pretty damn well.**

"there is no useless technique's" said meiling with determination that is just seen when she is deffending the mansion.

Marisa just stared at meiling for a while "you got pretty riled up for nothing..."

 _Wiz: He certainly hasn't lost his touch._

Announcer: Mike Haggar, the candidate who puts people first.

Haggar growls and kills a Bald Eagle perched on his arm.

"why?..." questioned alice who didn't knew why the hell he just killed a eagle.

"don't question it just enjoy it" came flandre's reply who was a little too happy about the eagle's death.

(*Cues: Zangief Theme (Atomic Fusion Remix) - Street Fighter II*)

 _Wiz: Zangief stands 7 feet tall at 350 pounds, weighing in as one of the strongest on the Street Fighting circuit._

"i hope he is tall in..." koakuma trailed off, the look's everyone was giving her except for the child-like youkai stoping her train of though knowing full well that if she continued her words she may find herself facing a horrible end.

 **Boomstick: And as a testament to his manliness, check out that wicked shin hair!**

"that's disgusting..." sakuya said annoyed at the sight of what basically was a human ogre she just couldn't stare at zangief for long, at least haggar was a respectable leader.

 _Wiz: Zangief is a champion wrestler in Russia, using push and pull techniques to throw his opponents off balance. He also specialises in Sambo, a combination of wrestling and martial arts. He's not skilled in leglocks and chokeholds but his grappling, submissions and groundwork are second to none._

"well then... that sounds familiar" said reimu who noticed that zangief's fighting style was similar to haggar's.

Marisa agreed with her "yeah it's almost like a mirror match".

 **Boomstick: Zangief's best moves include his double Lariat, Atomic Suplex, Flying Power Bomb and a wicked backhand called the Banishing Flat, a move Zangief learned specifically to counter projectiles. Zangief. HATES. Projectiles**.

"bullets aren't that bad..." said reimu feeling that zangief's hate, while justificated was a little exagerated.

"say's you how danmaku seem's to miss you just because sometimes..." grumbled remilia who fought reimu and she was sure that her danmaku hit her at least once.

The miko just shrugged her shoulders "i'm just good at dodging that's all".

"i think you got TOO good at it" marisa said a little annoyed at the miko's stupid ability to dodge stuff.

 _Wiz: His signature move is the Spinning Piledriver, which he learned after getting caught in a cyclone while piledriving a bear._

Flandre got giddy instantly "i want that!" she said enthusiastically.

"that sound's really dangerous... i'll try to do it" meiling said feeling that this could be a challenge to pull of she could find somekind of yokai bear but the tornado part could be difficult... maybe patchouli could help with that.

As if reading the mind of the gate keeper patchouli shaked her head in denial "no meiling i'm not using my magic to create a tornado for you".

 **Boomstick: That is the most awesome thing I've ever heard!**

"i know right!?" said flandre with a ear splitting smile.

Remilia sighed in resignation she probably should have said no to marisa when she offered to watch this thing, meiling and flandre will rundown the mansion with the crazy ideas they get from this.

 _Wiz: Actually, wrestling bears has been Zangief's favourite training exercise since he was a kid. Supposedly, he wrestles Grizzly bears, but these are not native to Russia. It's far more likely he wrestles Ussuri Brown Bears, which can weigh up to 1500 pounds, well over twice the size of a full grown Grizzly._

"is it even possible for normal humans to pull this kind of stuff without becoming youkai?" asked reimu in wonder, yeah she, marisa and sakuya can pull some crazy stuff but that's mainly their abilities at work and in marisa's case magic but these guys are technically still human and are pulling some super human stuff with just fisical training.

Alice came to answer reimu's question "apparently, these two are the prove of it, but it does seem to require a lot of time and patience to make all those training hours".

Reimu couldn't help but think that she should maybe do some of that training, she IS bad at taiking the hits that while rarelly land do leave her kinda tired.

 **Boomstick: Holy shit! He piledrived one of those into a Tornado!?**

"why in a tornado though?" patchouli couldn't help herself but ask the question.

The ice fairy of the group who understood zangief's animal training, she does similar stuff to froggs answered "because he can".

 _Wiz: Battling such a massive beast corresponds with his Russian wrestling training perfectly, forcing the bears to lose their balance and knocking them out cold! Zangief is a loyal Russian through and through, always fighting for his country rather than personal gain. He is often employed by the Russian President as the country's official fighting representative. That said, Zangief is pretty dimwitted, more a follower than a leader. He fights with instinct rather than reason._

"well... at least he has good qualities" sakuya said, apparently there was more to the brute than she though he was loyal and knew that he wasn't fit to lead so he diceded to follow the leader of rusia.

"someone that sticks to his strenghts is okay in my book" this was meiling who was very much like zangief in personality.

 **Boomstick: All the more reason to get out of his way!**

Zangief Attacks the Duck Hunt Dog and piledrives it.

"seriously, are muscular guys againts animal life or something?" wondered patchouli.

Zangief: Mmmmhhh! Me Zangief broke you!

"maybe? seems like they did it more because they feel like it" said marisa who didn't see actual malice in their actions.

The younger vampire didn't give a shit "who cares? let's just enjoy the carnage".

"the fight, you mean the fight right?" asked remilia to her sister just trying to make sure flandre wasn't TOO exited.

"yeah whatever" flandre said without looking at her.

Well that's a red flag.

(*Cues: Intro Theme - Saturday Night Slam Masters*)

Zangief and Haggar stand in a deserted street. Haggar stretches his muscles and rips his shirt while Zangief removes his cape, points upwards and laughs, and drinks a bottle of beer before crushing the bottle.

For some reason cirno felt like screaming so she did "ARE YOU READY TO RUUUUUMMMMMBLEEEEE!!!!????"

Meiling felt like giving cirno a lecture but something about what she screamed seemed to fit in the fight so she let it slide.

"did he got a beer from his underwear?" asked a surprissed and disturbed alice.

Koakuma saw the chance to make an indecent joke and she took it "well it makes sense, he needs a LOT of space to keep it in his pants".

Marisa and meiling where about to punish the demon but...

"was that a joke? can you explain it to me?" asked flandre who got distracted from the fight.

And remilia was looking at koakuma with cold rage said demon just stared at the TV with a smile but the sweat in her revealed her feelings right now.

FIGHT!

(*Cues: Lobby Screen - Street Fighter IV*)

Haggar and Zangief both grab each other and look each other in the eyes before Zangief throws Haggar behind him. He tries to attack Haggar with a flying kick, only to get blocked. He tries to punch him, but his punches get blocked too.

"so if the fact that they gave us are right zangief must have the strenght advantage..." said patchouli who remembers that zangief throws around bigger animals than haggar.

"yeah but i'm pretty sure that haggar has more experience" responded alice since haggar seemed to have the experience on his side.

(*Cues: Unknown Theme*)

After dodging Zangief's lariat, Haggar suplexes him, attacks him with a lariat and kicks him. Zangief suplexes Haggar twice and piledrives him before throwing him across the street.

"well the battle went from defensive to offensive in a second" said meiling who was surprissed by how the two fighters went for it.

"it's a fight to the death they are going to take all the chances they can" remilia said knowing full well that in a fight for your life you are probably not going to play fair.

As Zangief advances, Haggar kicks him and attacks him with a steel pipe but Zangief counters with the Banishing flat, knocking him into a building, which Zangief enters to finish the duel. As they fight, they also go upstairs. A couch, a globe, Princess Peach, a Dragon ball, Big the Cat and Pedobear get thrown out the building.

"well this just keeps getting better and better" flandre said with a stupidly big smile.

Cirno was staring at said vampire then turned towards daiyousei and rumia "that girl scares me sometimes" now she might be the strongest but there is something a little disturbing from flandre's love of violence.

"that's a lot of property damage..." comented reimu who wasn't sure how to feel about the damage they wre causing in the fight.

Marisa shrugged her shoulders "but you were completely fine entering the SDM through the rooftop".

"yeah... well mistakes were made" said reimu not noticing the looks the whole SDM crew are giving her.

(*Cues: Historic Distillery Stern - Street Fighter IV*)

Haggar and Zangief's fists hit each other and Haggar tries and fails to hit Zangief but Zangief suplexes Haggar near a window and, after a few blocked punches, throws himself at Haggar, sending them both out the window.

"ah so zangief wins then..." said meiling confusing some of the people here.

"why would you say that?, looks pretty even to me" reimu pointed out that the fight still looked even.

Zangief tries to pile drive Haggar into the pavement, but then Haggar begins to turn the tides and tries to piledrive Zangief, then Zangief tries to piledrive Haggar, then Haggar tries to piledrive Zangief.

Meiling nods "yes, but that was because haggar experience but right now they are in the air so strenght and technique are the key factor and only one of them trains more than the other" pointed out meiling.

"oh... guess that makes sense" said koakuma a who was a little all over the place this episode, she has a thing for muscular guys and that clouded her... judgement.

"damnit big sis! you ruined the end!" screamed flandre who was enjoying the whole thing until meiling spoiled the end, the gatekeeper just shrugged her shoulders nerviously.

This goes on for a while until they both hit the pavement. As the dust clears, Haggar and Zangief are both seen lying down on the pavement. But Haggar has blood around his head, indicating his death, then, Zangief stands up, points both arms upward and laughs triumphantly.

"...how is his head still in one piece?" asked rumia surprissed that a human skull could take that damage, well haggar is still dead but his dead wasn't as brutal as she expected it from such a big fall.

"who knows?" said cirno not really caring about it.

K.O.!

(*Cues: The Next Door: Indestructible (Instrumental)*) - Ultra Street Fighter IV

 **Boomstick: *Sighs* A great man has fallen today...**

"great in more than one way..." you know who said that.

"just... shut up koakuma" the annoyed patchouli said to her familiar.

 _Wiz: Haggar and Zangief's similar moveset appeared evenly matched, anticipating each other's moves and countering with their signature attack_.

"yeah but that wasn't going to last forever" comented remilia.

 **Boomstick: He led a long productive life, kicking ass, ruling Metro City and keeping the beaches safe from rogue sharks...**

Alice rolled her eyes at boomsticks dismay "yeah he was really respectable man we get it" but he was getting annoying.

 _Wiz: Not only is Zangief almost 100 pounds larger than Haggar, he's also 13 years younger and been training all his life._

"yeah experience can only get you so far in a fight" said reimu who was probably someone who shouldn't talk about it considering that she was born this strong.

"you only said that because of your stupid talent..." muttered sakuya who recieved the worst of reimu when she came to the SDM.

 **Boomstick: I'm gonna miss that wonderful mustache!**

"well yeah that's a pretty cool mustache..." cirno said not really adding anything to the conversatin she just like the mustache make him appear stronger.

 _Wiz: Zangief's youth and lack of political agenda were enough to give him a slight edge._

"yeah because if you have nothing to do just train and get stronger and time will just pass by" said meiling who trained when no one dcided to try to enter the mansion, she has a lot of free time.

 **Boomstick: Poor Haggar. He may piledrive sharks, but Zangief's bears were three times larger and probably twice as dangerous. Sure Haggar can grapple a half ton shark without falling over, but if Zangief can push around 1500 pound bears as a hobby, Haggar didn't stand a chance.**

"and this just proves my point "with enough power you can do anything"" said marisa cockily she knows that putting it your all in every attacks is the best way to go in any kind of fight.

Flandre agreed with marisa just because more power means more explosions.

And sakuya just rolled her eyes at the magician "only you would think that..." and the little mistress to but she isn't going to say that one out loud.

 _Wiz: He definately put up a great fight though._

"wouldn't be fun if he didn't" said a satisfied flandre this fight was quite entretaining.

 **Boomstick: That he did. 'Gief just found his window of opportunity.**

"5/10 not enough muscle jokes" said koakuma instantly.

"no it was just a bad joke all around" deadpaned patchouli who was glad this was over and her familiar's libido should lower down.

 _Wiz: The winner is Zangief._

 **Boomstick: Next time on death battle.**

"are those..." said a kinda perplexed reimu yeah gensokyo is weird but...

Marisa nodded "yeah they certanly are".

"well this is gonna get good" said remilia who found the prospet of turtles that are also ninjas pretty good and it was a battle royal wich could get even more interesting.

"NEXT EPISODE!" said a overly happy flandre, who si probably going to enjoy the next episode.

"well here we go again" said meiling who got up to pull the next episode.

 **ZANGIEF VS HAGGAR END**

 **So i'm gonna instanty start to writte the next chapter because i have kept this fic in the back while i wrote "the (kinda) devil hero, and it's time to give some love to this one.**

 **Not much else to say, i'll see you all next time!.**


	8. Family of four

**So... this death battle has come and i have some history with this one, considering that's the only death battle who shows more emotion than others i'm talking about how leonardo looks at the end of the animation.**

 **Wich makes me wonder why was it the ONLY (or atleast i think it is) deathbattle that shows that the characters that are fighting are not (always) bloodthirsty maniacs, after this one the reason that the fights happen are suden and make no sense but the animations are cool so whatevs.**

 **Then there is the fact that this deathbattle is... unusually brutal and there is the factor that they're brothers so it's even more fucked up why it was animated with such brutal deaths is beyond me, seriously haggar fell from a fucking building while he was being piledrived and they just showed some blood on his head then the next one shows BROTHERS brutally dismembering each other, that's quite the jump on the violence meter.**

 **Furtunatelly this gives me and opurtunity regarding... nah forget it just read to find out.**

(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)

"so yeah this episode has ninjas... that are also turtles" meiling comented not really weirded out by it, even if it was weird.

"who cares? as long as the fight is entretaining i don't care" said flandre who was tempting fate a little too much.

 _Wiz: Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo, Raphael. The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were grown from ooze and raised by a warrior rat in the sewers of New York to be the world's most fearsome fighting team._

Daiyousei stared "... that's a very interesting childhood" she really could't say more.

"that's pretty cool, but not as cool as me!" exclaimed the ice fiary that noticed how everyone was staring at her in either horror or exasperation "did i say something funny" or well at least it SEEMED like she noticed.

Rumia just patted in the back her kinda stupid friend "don't worry about it's nothing important" rumia knows how unaware cirno can be such as the fairy not noticing her horrible pun.

 **Boomstick: Lots of superheroes have some weird origin stories but this one is plain ridiculous.**

"thanks boomstick your ability to state the obvious sure comes in handy" the ever moody sakuya said who will never stop insulting him... even if he can't hear her.

 _Wiz: Their greatest advantage in battle is their family bond and teamwork. But, on their own, which Turtle is deadliest?._

Remilia knew that this death battle could go in a very bad direction, considering that theyare about to watch family kill each other wasn't that apealling much less with her SISTER right next to her.

And all of the more mature people also noticed this and were wondering if this was a smart idea.

 **Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.**

 _Wiz: And it's our job to analyse their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle._

Leonardo

(*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) - Main Theme (MARCH REMIX)*)

 _Wiz: Leonardo, the leader of the team is smart, strategic with a strong sense of honor._

 **Boomstick: Too bad he traded his sense of humour for that sense of honor. This guy always means serious business. His weapon of choice is the Ninjaken swords: Shorter, sturdier and straighter than an ordinary Katana, and designed for swift deadly strikes! Out of all the Turtles' weapons, the Ninjaken is the only one specifically designed to murder people! What's better than one Ninjaken? Two, Damnit!**

Meiling just shrugged her shoulders "i mean most warriors always have just one objective in mind usually honor or strenght".

"those swords of him... are like weird katana's, ninjaken i never heard of them" said sakuya not really sure if the ninjaken were even usable, but she doesn't know enough about japan weapons to tell.

 _Wiz: In many timelines, Leonardo's the one who ultimately defeats The Shredder, though always with plenty of help. As leader, he is usually the one with a plan. He spends most of his time training his body and mind under his Master Splinter's instruction and follows Bushido, a strict Samurai code of honor and duty. At one point, he even fought and killed a sort of physical embodiment of the Devil._

Remilia was impressed "that's impressive i just wonder WICH devil he killed" after all she is the escarlet devil the there was satan but she never saw that guy.

"if a turtle defeated it it could't compare to you mistress" said sakuya who needed to be a kiss ass, or she really just respected her master that much.

"kiss ass~" the youkai of darkness said making sakuya consider if she should take some kind of target practice with the blonde girl.

 **Boomstick: Giving Keanu Reeves a much needed break!**

 _Wiz: However, Leonardo finds it difficult to accept failure. Should things go horribly wrong, his concentration can quickly slip away from him, leaving him sloppy and inprecise._

"kinda like sakuya" marisa said meeting the stuborn maid of the SDM in the incident was a tiring experience more because her cockiness was a little over the top.

"yeah definetly like her" reimu agreed she saw sakuya when she lost to her the maid looked as she had found a whole new world.

Said maid was getting patted on the back by her mistress who saw how tense that maid was knowing that sakuya was probably having an internal struggle with herself about not killing the guests.

 **Boomstick: Leo doesn't like to lose.**

 _Leonardo (1987 cartoon version): "Quit clowning you guys! This is serious!"_

(*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2 (1991) - Cowabunga*)

 _Wiz: Donatello is the brains of the bunch._

 **Boomstick: He does machines!**

"so the patchouli of the group" marisa comented making the purple clad magician gave her a flat stare but did't said anything since she knows she is the brain of SDM.

 _Wiz: Right, Boomstick. Somehow, he learned to operate and manipulate both Human and alien technology without any formal education or budget whatsoever. He also speaks 100% fluent Techno-babble._

"techno-what?" a confussed cirno questioned.

Daiyousei just shrugged her shoulders not knowing the answer either.

 _Donatello: "The resulting intermit multi-polar flux should create the Electromagnetic Pulse!"_

Cirno was even more confussed now "seriously, what?!".

Reimu just sighed in exasperation "stop asking no one knows what he said".

 **Boomstick: What the hell did I just hear? All that gibberish means he's probably trained less than the others, devoting more of his time for Science!**

"you see patchouli?, you should do more training even this turle is more fit than you" exclaimed meiling, who has tried to get the magician to do something else besides reading books all day.

The magician just shook her head and said "never" those words had more conviction than usual.

 _Wiz: Fortunately, his useful Bo Staff makes up for his lack of constant training. Durable Oak and Six feet long, the Bo gives Donatello far more attack range than his other brothers._

 **Boomstick: The range is nice, but it takes a lot of time and patience to kill anybody with a stick!**

"well that's because you didn't try hard enough" said... daiyousei and cirno was nodding besides her.

Everyone else just estared at the duo wondering what the hell did they mean.

"you don't know, but fairies can take somethings too literally" cirno mentioned, not saying that they were playing gladiators and some fairies took it too serously with their sticks.

 _Wiz: He's no expert strategist, that's Leonardo's turf, but Donatello's considered the most level-headed of the Turtles. Even with his time spent tinkering, he's still a very capable warrior, easily keeping up with his brothers and even killing the Shredder in an alternate dimension._

"well i'll be... a badass nerd" said rumia who felt a chill on her spine noticing how the other magicians except marisa were glaring at her.

And marisa didn't really care, she usually tries really dangerous stuff that ends up working so she isn't really a bookworm, but she definetly knows her stuff... even of some of it is stole- i mean borrowed.

 **Boomstick: An ass-kicking nerd? I don't believe it.**

 _Donatello (2003 cartoon version): "Eh, I'm making this up as I go."_

(*Cues: TMNT: Turtles in Time - Big Apple, 3 AM*)

Wiz: Michelangelo is the youngest of the turtles. He's lazy, undisciplined and easily distracted. He spends his free time playing video games, watching TV, reading comic books, and eating pizza.

"okay?" said remilia whowasn't even sure that was part of anything meaningfull on that analisys.

 **Boomstick: That turtle is fucked up!**

 _Wiz: What?_

"i'm with wiz on this, the fuck?" marisa almost screamed at how sudenlly this became a contest to insult a turtle.

 **Boomstick: Come on, you can't tell me that that turtle is not on drugs!**

"isn't the point of this to not be biased?" asked koakuma who noted that they haven't said anything really importan about michelangelo.

 _Wiz: I don't know, I always thought he was dropped as a kid._

"not really important" said meiling weirded out aboutthe change of actitud of the hosts.

 **Boomstick: Okay, look! He has all the signs! Strange eating habits, inability to pay attention, incoherent phrases...**

 _Wiz: Moving on, his weapon of choice..._

"okay finally" rumia said a little glad that they were over with the insults.

 **Boomstick: The bong,**

"wha?!-" almost everyone in the room screamed.

 _Wiz: No, the Nunchaku, isn't really a weapon at all. It's a farming tool for threshing grain. These "weapons" are unnecessarily overcomplicated clubs with the effectiveness of a tattered flyswatter. Yet SOMEHOW, Michelangelo has been able to blunder his way through fights to victories he really doesn't deserve!_

"nevermind..." said rumia feeling a little sense of deja-vu.

 **Boomstick: He even beat Raph once.**

 _Wiz: Sure, I get it, swing chuks around gives him momentum to hit with them, blah, blah, blah, but in the end, a baseball bat will give you the same effect and more with much less effort. Seriously, who came up with these things? They're preposterous!_

"are you going to tell us anything importan about michelangelo?" sakuya asked pretty much done with the useless insults and no info or meaningfull background of the character.

 **Boomstick: You're prepostemous! I don't know.**

 _Wiz: And, for some reason, in all his infinite wisdom, the great master Splinter gave the most complicated weapon to the retard of the group. WHY?_

"okay so anything important now?" patchouli said wondering if anything good was going to be said.

 **Boomstick: ...Mikey's not gonna win this fight, is he?**

 _Wiz: He'd better not._

"...wait, THAT'S IT!?" alice screamed they literally know next to nothing about michelangelo, what was the point of this then?

 _Michelangelo (2007 movie version): Ho ho, someone's cranky!_

"more like angry and unreasonable... like reimu when she is solving incidents~" rumia still spitting fire... and probably putting herself in danger.

(*Cues: I Beam Fight - TMNT*)

 **Boomstick: Raph is cool but crude! Hell, forget crude, this guy's borderline psycho!**

 _Wiz: Sure to throw the first punch, Raphael is certainly the most vicious of the team. He's constantly butting heads with the others and challenging Leonardo's leadership._

"like reimu and marisa?" cirno asked, even she can notice who are the one's to throw the first punch.

"that's... just half true" said the miko but she will admit that she does throw the first attack, usually because she is annoyed.

Marisa didn't care, the first move is the most important after all.

 **Boomstick: He uses twin Sai, which is like a combination of a pitchfork, dagger and Wolverine's claws.**

 _Wiz: Like the nunchuk, they also humbly began as a farming tool but were re-evaluated to counter the oppressive samurai._

"but unlike the nunchuk this one is usefull... or atleast that how he makes it sound" remilia said still wondering they even bothered to add michelangelo if they weren't gonna do... a lot with him yeah let's go with that.

 **Boomstick: They're best used as a close ranged defensive weapon. The triple prongs are designed to block, trap, and control an opponent's weapon, while using the pommel to beat the enemy into submission. Raph's Sai can even snap swords!**

"so the sai's are for destroying another weapons" sakuya said noticing that it gave raphael a good advantage againts most of their brothers... not that he would use it with his attitude.

 _Wiz: Raphael is not exactly the smartest fighter, usually rushing into a brawl without a plan and just overpowering a foe. Because of this, Raphael spends much of his time honing his combat skills. It is very likely he is physically the strongest turtle._

"the best physical fighter of the bunch, i... actually think he can win" said reimu aparently this guy was the best fighter, that should count for something the only one she can think would be able to beat him is leonardo.

"huh, you and me reimu we are thinking the same thing... maybe" said marisa who, of course will band herself with the guy with more power.

 **Boomstick: Also, this guy's in some serious need of anger management!**

Flandre also noticed that this guy is a lot like herself, except he is always angry and she is always... very entuciastict of violence but they seemed to have similar problems, they don't like the leaders she herself can't trust her sister, in the end flandre herself dicided to trust her and went to the basement and stayed in there hoping that remilia would help her, and she did... it just took 400 years and a shrine maiden beating the living shit out of her.

so yeah there was bound to be some trust issues from that experience.

 _Wiz: He is naturally hot-headed and sometimes loses control of his rage. He is much more vicious than the other turtles and, at one point in the comics, even became the Shredder himself._

Well... yeah she did went a little over board when she finally came out of the basement and playing danmaku with marisa too harshly, the magician WAS limping after that fight.

 _Raphael (90s movie version): Damn!_

(*Cues: 1987 TMNT Sewer BGM*)

But before all of this rumia could't help but ask "are we really about to watch familly kill each other?~" she herself didn't care being probably more used to violence than even the vampires here probably at the same level of the maid that reeked of blood a little bit more than the vampires themselves but she knew that her two friends were not that used to this kinda stuff that could get emosional at time, the youkai of darkness know this since a good chunk of parents and son's came for vengeance againts her.

"i mean... what's the worst that could happen?" said alice who was a little uncomfortable with the idea doesn't think that it would be that bad.

But she didn't know that murphy is omnipressent.

In the sewers of New York, the turtles face each other and they draw their weapons.

 **FIGHT!**

(*Cues: Unknown Theme*)

Leonardo goes after Michelangelo and both trade blow for blow. Meanwhile, Donatello faces Raphael and Leo backflips past them. As Michelangelo attacks him, Leo stabs him with his swords, then leaps over him and slices off his arm, followed by his head, then Michelangelo was decapitated.

"Well this just fucking started and we already see that kind of shit!" exclaimed marisa surprissed of the brutality between brothers.

Reimu just kinda stared some bad memories form when she was younger came back, of when she was born and her mother...

Alice was almos slack jawed but keep herself from showing too much, remembering her familly back in makai then looking at this... all because she without knowing tempted murphy.

Remilia won't let this get the better of her... it was unerving watching this right next to her sister who was oddly still.

(*Cues: Mouser Arsenal - TMNT 2K3 Game*)

Don and Raph continue fighting. Both seem evenly matched until Don throws Raph past Leo. Leo tries to attack Don, but Don leaps on a stack of crates and begins hitting Leo in the head with his staff.

"seems pretty tame..." and with cirno words everything went bad... again.

(*Cues: Stars Align - TMNT*)

Raph gets up and knocks the crates down, sending Don flying backwards onto the floor. Raph proceeds to stab Don with his sai 24 times and then faces Leo.

Flandre who compared herself tho raph before didn't see raphael and donnatelo, she saw herslef and remilia, and she won't get that image out of her head for a while... and make her question her own action for a while.

"you and cirno can stop looking if you want to" while rumia really didn't give a fuck, she does eat people alive but knows full well that this kind of brutatlity is somewhat new for them and she does care about those two.

Daiyousei did so quickly enough, but cirno kept staring soething in her eyes showing her something else, she didn't like it and she will fix it.

They both fight each other and Raph knocks Leo into the water. As Leo resurfaces, Raph jumps into the water. They both trade blows with their weapons. Both seem to be at a stalemate until Raph catches Leo's swords with his sais. Eventually, the sais break Leo's sword and then both stab the other. Raph, however, is stabbed in the throat while Leo's wound isn't fatal.

"ah so that's it..." patchouli said who knew of what sakuya does to... remilia's and flandre's food but being as secluded as she is and reading so many books then she hans't seen this type of brutatlity she is used to blood and death but violence for the sake of it is something she luckily hasn't dealt with.

Said maid knew that she shouldn't comment at this since her job is to take all the blood from the outsiders yukari gives them so she kept silent knowing that she wasn't the one to said anything about this.

 _Raphael: DAMN!_

Raphael falls below the surface of the water, which is coloured red by his blood. Leo sits down in the water and looks at the sai in his body.

 **K.O.!**

(*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) - Main Theme (Rock/Metal Cover)*)

 **Boomstick: Woah-ho-ho, somebody call an ambulance! Or a vet, I don't know.**

"oh right, this guy" said meiling knowing that the situation is kinda bad rightnow and the last thing they need is boomstick bullshit.

 _Wiz: There is a reason why Leonardo is the leader of the team. Not for strength or speed, but for strategy. Leonardo understands the strengths and weaknesses of the other turtles. His biggest threat was Raphael's sword snapping Sai, so he attacked the weakest of the group first._

"know yourself and the enemy and the result is clear" this was rumia, this is the basic rule of predators well it is if you are dealing with other youkai.

 **Boomstick: This means Leo let Donny beat the hell outta Raph, who couldn't compete with Don's range. By the time Raph got his revenge, Leo was in way better shape for the final duel.**

 _Wiz: And I can hear all the fanboys raging "But Raph won in the movie! He should win here! Nyah nyah!" No! Four reasons. One: The result of the fight was specifically plot constructive, which is rarely accurate. Two: Leonardo absolutely decimated Raph in the fist fight beforehand. Three: Leonardo didn't want to fight at all. If he did, he would've killed Raphael right here._

"well... we didn't really have problems with it" marisa noticed how reimu and alice are acting and it's not nice.

 **Boomstick: Tilt the blade, slide left, bam: No more Raph.**

 _Wiz: And four; That whole movie doesn't make much sense to begin with. Why should this?_

"because that's the point of your job?" koakuma comented trying and failing to bring up the mood.

 **Boomstick: But hey, Leo can still die from that stab, right?**

 _Wiz: Doubtful, for several reasons. Turtles proportionally have smaller vital organs and far more muscle mass than humans, meaning there's little chance Raphael actually hit anything important. Leo's actually been stabbed plenty of times in the series and walked away, and all four turtles have been trained in Chi Kung and can control their breathing and heart rate to survive extreme conditions._

"um... yeah okay, get on with it" meiling said really wanting this to end so she could do damage control on flandre.

 **Boomstick: Looks like Leo got the point of this battle.**

"god that was awful and you should kill yourself for it" rumia had dealed with eneough boomstick for a day.

 _Wiz: The winner is Leonardo._

not even waiting for the next battle marisa just turned off the TV.

"so... i'll start putting it all back to the box" said marisa that started to do just that, since she will have to take back to her house.

"yeah this was a... interesting last episode" said meiling who got up went to flandre and carried the vampire in her arms, flandre seemed out of it too "i'll take flandre to her room, so i'll see you all later" and with that she left the room.

Remilia got up and left without saying a word sakuya following close behind, patchouli did the same not before poking alice in the cheek to get her out of her shock the blode girl shook her head and left with the purple wearing magician koakuma just shrugged and left too.

"well we should go too" rumai told the fairy duo daiyousei nodded and cirno got up and the look on the ice fairy, that kind of seriousness didn't fit her.

And the last one's were reimu and marisa, the magician had everyting in the box and was ready to leave then she saw reimu's expression.

"hey, how are you feeling?" the worried marisa made her concern known, but reimu just glanced at her the got up.

"it's just a really old memorie nothing much" the hakurei shrine maiden lied and marisa knew that and that worried her reimu was blunt and never seemed to care about other people opinnion of her, so why does she care now?.

"if you say so" but marisa also knew reimu well enough to know when not to push a subject.

And with that the incident solvers left the room not knowing that a long winter was coming and it would be far colder than it should be.

 **Oh yeah some stuf is gonna go down the next few chapters are not gonna be reaction but world building so just telling you that right now.**

 **Also i have never read the touhou mangas or the light novels so the characters from those i don't know when i'll make them appear or you people could tell me when they are supossed to come to gensokyo.**

 **Well i'll see you all next chapter!.**


	9. Extra chapter: cold reality (canon)

**Woah what the hell is this!?.**

 **A short chapter to explain the shit some characters are going through, i'll make like three of these to show you what is going on outside of the reaction to DB wich isn't the only thing going on.**

 **This is gensokyo and DB is just another weird thing more in gensokyo the world keeps going even without it.**

 **So enjoy this chapters that i'll call "extra chapters"... yeah like extra stages, i'm not very original i know.**

 **Well then let's just get on with it!.**

Cirno knows that she isn't the smartest, the strongest... she isn't sure anymore, she though that she was a special case for various years.

But it was more like a running joke,making fun of her words but she is just another fairy more, and it became clearer when she went to see that "death battle thingy".

She was sitting in an ice chair on the edge of misty lake thinking after they stopped watching that thing, and she could't help but think about the last one they watched miche-something was treated like a joke just like fairies and went out as quickly as them.

Then the red turtle stabbed it's brother contstantly, while a horrifying scene she saw fairies in the scene again being harmed with no aparent end and nothing happens to the people who harms them... the red-white, the black-white, that maid and many more.

Wich made her think, why are fairies even in gensokyo? she really found no answer, fairies unlike youkai don't need belief to exist, they came of nature and nothing else.

She herslef is not really that smart but even she knows that gensokyo is a place for those who need belief to live, so why are fairies here? the only one who could know that is the gap-woman and daiyousei.

Since dai is probably the oldest fairy around she could know, and another bad thought came to her why were the fairies letting the humans of the outside world do that to nature?, harming it.

So why aren't the childs of nature defending it, they are inmortal and the only way to remove that is by destroying nature itself, humans wouldn't be able to stop an unkillable army and wouldn't be able to destroy nature, they need it too after all.

The more she thought about it the less sense it make, this whole thing seems like a lose lose situation for fairies, wasn't gensokyo a chance for the mythical?, then why it seems... so unfair for them?.

Was it a lie?, is that gap-woman hiding things to the fairies... is dai hiding something?,

She wouldn't right? they are the best of friends!... but she led me believe that she was the strongest, everyone did, why? because it amused them...

But dai isn't like that... right?.

Why?... why does everything seem so different now?, so much darker... and worse...

"cirno-san?" i look up and see a blonde blue eyed fairy looking at me nerveously while holding tightly her gaint sunflower.

"huh?" was really the only thing she could say, was i too deep in thougt?.

"do... you want to play hide and seek?" why does she sound so... shaken? no scared.

Scared of who?... of the one in front of her, of cirno of _me_.

"... no i don't feel like it..." why am i so sad?.

And i flew away from here, towards the human village, looking at it from above those little things that are weaker than the daughters of nature, yet protected by the unnatural... unfair.

It is unfair, the youkai and gods defend them because of they need them... but the fairy don't _need_ them much less the youkai and gods.

And why should she care for there lives?, they never cared about theirs, that'll make us square.

Winter was getting close...

And who better to make them face the cold face of reality than an ice fairy?.

 **Did you all like it? maybe i'm not a mind reader anyway.**

 **You all should probably know who else is getting the next two "extra chapters" not gonna say who, just in case you all actually haven't figured out.**

 **So see you all... probably tomorrow since this one's aren't that long.**

 **Later!.**


	10. Extra chapter: a mistake? (canon)

**The next "extra chapter" has been done.**

 **Just one more for the next reaction, and also the next incident.**

 **Not a lot more to say but telling you to enjoy.**

I flandre scarlet likes to thing that she's a good girl, yes she tends to lose it from time to time but that almost never happens anymore, so knowing this she couldn't help but wonder from time to time, why did she listen to her sister when she was told to go and stay in the basement room?.

Said place became her actual room when she finally was allowed outside, to this day i don't know why i like the place so much.

Lying on my over-sized bed i went though back to the past, thanks to things that happened now i can't help but wonder if what i tried to do was actually justified.

Because i trust my sister, knowing that she will do something about my destructive powers...and she waited a LONG time for that to happen, no one really tried to see what was below the scarlet devil mansion, probably because her sister told them to.

Two hundred years in the same place were not kind to me, so i tried to scape but sister saw it differently that i went "out of control", at that time i though that fight was a game but the current residents at that time didn't, patchouli just used water without stopping and her sister was pretty vicious, meiling- now big sis seemed to see something else.

It was back to the basement for me, but big sis will come to visit a lot of times, wether her sister liked it or not, wich made relationships even roockier, but it was the best 150 years of flandre.

Then sakuya came... at that time the maid was to put it simply an uptight bitch, big sis came less and less because big sis wasn't "allowed" to come down.

Those 50 years were enough for me to hate them, sakuya is deboted to no end towards her sister and said sister wasn't trying to help me.

Not to say how cold was sakuya at the time, flandre may enjoy to explode things and stupid violence but she hates needless dead, something that her light-eater sister and sakuya didn't think about, i know my need of blood but she doesn't need to kill the humans.

I know that those dead humans bellow the mansion in a separated basement died because sakuya just hated them all and her sister nesecity to drench everything in blood while only needing a half-full vase of blood a day.

Flandre just hated all of this... then they came to gensokyo, a place her sister wanted for herself at the time and was planning on how to take it, wich means they won't be aware when i try to get out again.

Yes most of my actions the day of my "release" were driven by anger, all of the residents of the mansion were weak at the time from the incident they started.

She went for it, the bones of sakuya cracking under my hands, the blood of my sister, the sick patchouli watching helplessly koakuma scared in a cornner and meiling asking me to stop, but not this time, those two are the main reason of my pain.

But she was stopped by marisa, not that the blond exactly won but managed to persuade me of doind the deed, after that day i was able to leave the basement... and that let me see things in a different way, her sister was a surprisingly good leader, i was just biased againts her because of the 400 years down there.

Sakuya was changing thanks to gensokyo she seemed more... human, yeah that was its she stoped looking like a machine.

Patchouli told me how many time my sister will come to the library looking for ways to suppress great quantity of powers, so... am i wrong of thinking bad of them? a little... but i couldn't forget those years below the mansion.

I no longer hated them and i didn't like them either, fastfoward a couple of months and everything was still the same then that box of marisa came.

And it contained a lot of dumb violence, something that i loved... then the fight of the turtless came in and i couldn't help but wonder if at the time i tried to harm sakuya and my sister i looked like that raphael guy a angry beast.

So with this new perspective i think back at what my sister did and ask myself "was she really wrong?".

The scary thing, is that i'm starting to agree with that decision.

 **Boy wasn't that depressing?.**

 **So yeah hope you enjoyed this chapter, just one more to go.**

 **I'll see you all... tomorrow... again.**


	11. Extra chapter: where is the mom? (canon)

**Well... i just wroted this in about 2 hours, why i didn't do it before? i was playing castlevania lament of innocense and curse of darkness, and kinda forgot about this.**

 **But no more and after this one the next reaction and incidents will happen.**

 **Wich means a lot of ghosts that don't look like ghosts but who cares? they're cute.**

 **Nothing else to say, let's just get on with this!.**

Reimu hakurei knows she is a lazy person and that's not wrong, thinking that doing most things is a pain that made her who she is today, even knowing about her family was too much trouble.

After all she just needs to be good at her job and she will have an easier life, less stuff to deal with.

The job of the hakurei shrine maiden is kinda hard the need to be impartial in the problems of youkai that are a bunch over-complicating monsters and humans who are for the most part a bunch of wussies affraid of even of fairies... when said fairies decide to fight back.

So being able to be lazy in her home for the most time should be enough paying for her work (because no one wants to donate to her shrine...), yes it is but the youkai she usually beats the living crap of don't think the same and decide to make parties in a shrine, wich should be the bane of their existence.

But they are good company and bring food, not a lot to complain about.

...

That made me think... now here in the kotatsu with some tea being lazy didn't feel right today, all because of a little memory, one of her mom.

I was very young only got one glance at the long white hair and that got me curious, it looked like she was leaving the shrine at that moment, then why didn't she comeback?.

Did a youkai got her?, did she hate the hakurei job and left her to deal with it? no use thinking about it when there is someone who can tell her, well there is more than one person that might know about but only one of those is actually going to tell me the truth and won't try to activily annoy me.

So i got out of my kotatsu, put the black shoes, went outside and flew to the back of the shrine, were her technically father figure and someone who knew all the past hakurei shrine maidens... but not the god of said shrine because that bastard just won't show up... but that doesn't really matter.

I landed near the edge of the pond "genji" there isn't really anything else to say the over-siced turtle came from bellow the pond and was staring at me with his pattented "old wise guy" smile.

"aaahhhhh... reimu-san, are still watching the death matches?" he said with a carefree tone of voice, but i noticed the small dissapointment, considering that he told me to not watch more "death battle" but that's not why i'm here.

"yes i did, but i'm not here to get lectured... again" i really didn't, had enough of that when i was younger.

"that i can see, you seem troubled" for such an old turtle he sure is sharp, as allways.

I stared at him for a moment, wodering if i would even like the answer but i'm already here so might as well do it "what hapened to my mother".

Genji didn't flinch or gave some kind of bad reaction but he did rise and eyebrow... and started stroking his beard with his turtle leg, how he has that kind of dexterity being a turtle to do that is beyond me.

"well... i knew this question will come, but i never though that it would take you this long to do that" he said to himself.

"...so?" i asked him, was he trying to avoid the question?.

He closed his eyes for a moment the opened his left one staring at me "well... she told me to not tell you were she left, but to tell you she is closer than you think...".

Ah so she is dead... how am i-

"and no she is not dead, don't go making that kind of speculations without hearing everything i have to say" genji interrupted my train of though.

"then were the hell is she?, unless she is the god of the shrine wich i doubt she is" my question packed a little more heat that i wanted it to.

"she is going to drag a friend from the void" genji answered me, not giving me anythig of what i asked form.

Pretty sure he noticed my look so he started talking again "she told me that when i asked where she was going, i got a couple guesses of what that means but i know she is alive".

So... from all of this i didn't get the answere i wanted... at least it's not the one i feared "what can you tell me about her?".

He smiled at me opening both eyes "well she once...".

 **... So reimu's mom got white hair and that's all you are getting for now... i hope i wasn't to obvious.**

 **Oh well i'll find out that later, so the next chapter will probably longer since i'll have to explain some of the stuff i just threw at you... or some of it.**

 **Whatever just need to write the next chapter and pray to god i don't fuck it up.**

 **See you all in the next chapter.**


	12. the frigid edge of spite (part 1)

**I'm aware of how long it took me to write this wich was supposed to be longer but i'll have to make it a two part maybe three.**

 **Since i got sick like twice in a row, first my left eye was hurting like a bitch then after putting some medicine on it it got better then after that was done i got a fucking fever and a headache.**

 **Me being kinda lazy and in pain i couldn't write without hating everything, but i couldn't just let you with nothing so i decided to divide this shit while i'm writting it.**

 **Sorry for that and enjoy.**

Marisa is very annoyed.

This winter has been long ridiculously so and it has been getting colder by the day, for fuck sake's some mushrooms in the forest are frozen solid!, whatever the hell is going on someone has to stop it.

Not only for those reasons, she nearly died too!, she had to enchant her clothes to constantly warm her body AND it's still feels cold!, she brought some preparations in her hat in case she has to do an enchantment again, because reimu is really going to need them.

The village is probably fairing worse..., she herself really can't make time to see if they're fine but keine should have an idea to keep them alive.

Is alice okay?, how is the SDM dealing with this crazy cold marisa wants answers but to do that she needs reimu's help to deal with the incident.

She was now flying above the hakurei shrine... wich is laking a lot of snow wich is weird, she can't recal reimu having the ability to make something to block out cold.

Marisa was now descending and she could see gaps at the edges of the shrine, they were blocking the cold then, but why is yukari helping? that's not her usual demanor, and she nows of this mainly because reimu likes to get drunk a lot, and talk while she is like that.

Something is very wrong.

Just when she was gonna reach the edge of the shrines she crashed into some sort of invicible wall, so the gaps were blocking more than the cold, but why?.

Then a gap appeared in front of her almost like someone was telling her to enter, she really didn't have a lot oftime so might as well go for it.

The moment she flew through the thing she was in the front door of the Hakurei shrine, and it's full of snow and icicles, then it wasn't blocking the cold it was an ilussion.

She landed on the ground and entered the shrine, she saw reimu and a blond woman, with a purpled dress long blonde hair, a white mop covering the top of her head and long-ass white gauntlets they reached past the woman's elbow.

Reimu had blue patches in her skin here and there and she also seemed to be in some pain, and the woman who Marisa can only assume is Yukari, seemed calm but a slight forrow on her eyes could be seen.

Both Reimu and Yukari were sitting on the kotatsu they noticed marisa and reimu just signaled her to seat too, meaning that this is serious talk.

Marisa did as told "so... shit outside is going horribly, so you know waiting for you to do what you do best reimu" the magician was just a little done with the winter.

"i usually would... but the thing i-" Reimu started speaking only to be cut off by yukari who said "it's more than one incident".

Marisa took a very deep breath... "that's bad".

"very bad" said Yukari.

"yes we know, what matters is what we are gonna do about it" reimu was in serious mode right now, or the "i'm gonna fantasy seal every single thing i see" mode as Marisa calls it.

Marisa took a glance at yukari "i assume we are, but what is she gonna do exactly? you know just to be in the loop".

Yukari sighed, she is annoyed by something "i already have told my shikigamy to help the village, turns out kitsunne fire can keep bodies very warm, and the shikigami of my shikigami is putting most youkai in a safe place".

Marisa was pretty impressed by this "you sure act quickly... well it would have been better to act before today, but no one did".

"Yeah that's nice and everything but i could use some help with these" reimu pointed at the her very cold skin.

"well, why hasn't she?, you told me she had this power that could do almost everything" was Marisa's reply, that and telling reimu to strip to enchant her clothes sounds a little weird.

"well Marisa, i had to create the safe zone for wild youkai, keep youkai mountain from becoming i gaint popsicle and saving Reimu's life, so i'm just a LITTLE bit tired" the words of the youkai were spoken calmly, but there was a noticeble rise on her voice as she kept going.

"Geez!, calm down i get it Reimu please stript, i need to enchant your clothes" Marisa said annoyed, it sounded like Yukari rarely had to TRY in order to get things going.

"wha-?, no i have spares in my room, did you really think i was that poor" Reimu questioned her friend, said friend displayed a high level of wisdom and tried to run.

"well i'm going to your room to do my thing" marisa quickly made an excuse to get the fuck out.

And so she did, leaving both Reimu and Yukari alone "you really don't know who is doing the second incident?" Reimu sounded geneunly curious, yukari had alway's know who was causing problems around just in case the hakurei failed their jobs.

Not that they have done that before, but yukari likes to have all the cards in very situattion.

"as i told you before, a friend of mine made the first incident, the long winter and i would have let you handle it but then it got colder and colder by the day i confirmed that my friend wasn't the one behind it but someone else, who is using the first incident to create a second one" was Yukari's explination.

"and you haven't tracked the culprit because...?" Reimu asked a little annoyed.

And Yukari is probably just as annoyed but she is better at keeping it hidden "i think i already explained myself to marisa"

"can you at least give me a direction to take? this needs to be resolved sooner than my 'hakurei insticts' would let me find it" yeah, Reimu is very aware of how she just stumbles in front of the culprit every single time, but it takes a while.

And everyone is going to die at some point because of the cold.

"well... it's the coldest around the forest of magic" that was Yukari's only answer, the fact that the she wasn't informed in the second incident gave Reimu a very bad feeling.

"it's done, now if you use these clothes you won't be as cold" Marisa came out of Reimu's room, with a shrine maiden outfit, it had weird orange symbols in each independent piece of clothing, it was the same for Marisa's clothes too.

"did you just said 'not as cold'?" The shrine maiden was not amussed.

To this Marisa scoffed "you see Reimu, i don't like magic that isn't flashy so there's that and if you haven't noticed, it's really. fucking. cold".

"whatever i'm going to change, Yukari please explain the sittuation to marisa WITHOUT making her feel stupid" and the shrine maiden took her enchanted clothes back to her room.

After Reimu left the room was silent...

"are you gonna do what she asked...?" marisa asked.

"... you are going to solve one incident and Reimu will solve the other one, there done" the voice of the youkai sage came in a mix of lazyness and anger.

"kay" Marisa didn't feel like pushing her luck today.

 **5 minutes later.**

Reimu came back and noticed that both Marisa and Yukari were unusually silent.

"i'm gonna guess that marisa knows what we are gonna do know" Reimu is really done with the cold today.

"kinda" Marisa didn't say that Yukari really didn't explain jack-shit, but this isn't time to be complaining.

"So who is gonna solve what?" Marisa was eager to get rid of this dumb winter.

"well i wan't to meet the one that was about to make me an ice statue, that means i'm going to the forest of magic" as it can be seen Reimu like's to keep grudges.

"and i'm going towards?" Marisa gave yukari a subtle (not really) stare.

Yukari also saw this as a chance to vent some frustration, bad for her that so did reimu and the shrine maiden is in no mood to deal with this shit "just fucking tell her already" Reimu isn't taking any kind of dumb shenannigans.

Yukari didn't know if she should pout or just explode in anger "you are no fun Reimu, you have to go above the clouds you'll see a giant hole you will find the culprit there".

"gotcha!, so... whoeversolvestheirincidentfirstbuystheothersomesake!" marisa said rapidly and flew outside at fast speeds.

Totally forgetting yukari's wall and crashing on it a second time.

"... just let us out Yukari" Reimu didn't want to coment on her friend's stupidity.

The youkai just snaped her fingers tiredly, then Reimu and marisa found themselves outside of the edges of the shrine, marisa was also upside down in the VERY cold snow, showing her bloomers to the fucking world.

Reimu easily pulled her out "if this is your A game i pretty much have free sake for today".

The witch was busy shaking off the snof of her body and clothes "yeah whatever you said, you won't be that cocky when i'm done with whoever is to blame for this" said Marisa while pointing around her.

"and i'm the cocky one..." Reimu said while shaking her head.

"i'm going now, you know because fuck the cold, good luck Reimu" Marisa was already getting on her broom again ready to take flight.

"you too, don't go doing something stupid" And with that, the only people that usualy do anything about incidents because everyone else either don't give a fuck or are to lazy for it because Reimu always solves it and some of them have probably gotten confident in that result.

 **With Marisa, towards the clouds.**

The blonde magician is going towardss the sky, since she was told that one of the culprits was there not that she trust that gap-youkai but it's not like she has a lot of clues on where to go.

"it's getting warmer..." this Confussed marisa, it was still cold...just not as much it was more like normal winter cold.

Then she caught something at her left, it was red and was coming very fast...

"MARISAAAAAA!" and that the magicians cue to dodge, quickly.

Marisa moved downwards making the living red projectile to go just above her hat, talk about aclose call.

"was that flandre?" Marisa asked herself looking at her right after stoping to get a better look at flandre who was flying back towards her, obviously slower.

The childish vampire is wearing a longer version of her dress that seemed more puffy, it also seemed to be themed like a thing from the outside world, 'christmass' was it called?, it seemed odly fitting on Flandre and Marisa didn't really know why.

"flandre, what are you doing here?" a simple question requering a simple answer.

The vampire shifted nerveously for a moment... "i escaped my home".

At this moment the witch asked herself if things could ever be easy "why?".

"well... we were missing some food and it was slowly going down trough the winter... the my sister wanted to see something else than the snow and told sakuya to solve the incident, obviously patchouli did something so that she wouldn't die out here" explained Flandre.

"that still doesn't answer my question" stated marisa.

Flandre shrugged her shoulders "the reason my sister told sakuya to solve this is just a little dumb..." more like really fucking stupid, but Marisa wasn't going to said that out loud.

"so you are here just because you think remilia's solution si really petty?" asked marisa.

"kinda?, more like i wanted to go outside and stretch my legs a little..." Flandre's voice sounded diferent for a moment, like she remmebered something bad.

Marisa noted that as flandre probably lying not that she was gonna push her on it... atleast not now "well i know that one of the incidents started above the clouds..."

"one of them?" Marisa heard a voice behind her and turned around, the elegant maid was here and she is meaning bussines, Sakuya is wearing her normal maid uniform except this one had a long skirt instead of a shor one and a red scarf.

"sakuya?" Flandre asked, wondering why the maid came here.

"young mistress, i will ask for you to go back to the mansion" sakuya alsway polite voice reached marisa's ears, and she noticed the edge in it that means that a fight was gonna happen in any other situation marisa would be fine with this, but two incidents is not exactly a laughing matter much less when it was about to kill reimu.

So while what appeared like a child trying to move a wall with words was happening, she tried to leave then a knife sailed at the left side of her head making the witch to stare at the maid.

"where do you think you are going?" Sakuya's voice was still polite but it also carried an even more noticable edge.

"solve one of the incidents" she really didn't have time for this...

Sakuya noticed this and prepared more knifes... this was gonna end in a fight one way or another, but leaving the incident more time is a bad idea, the magician glanced at Flandre for just a second and knew she will regret this desicion.

"Flandre this incedent is worse than it seems and sakuya won't let me leave, so i wan't you to go above the clouds and look for a hole in the sky" Marisa told Flandre while getting her hakero ready.

"wha-?, okay then" Flandre didn't get it for a moment but marisa sounded extrangely serious.

"young mistress i'm strongly againts this desicion" the maid said but she was ignored as flandre started to fly upwards.

Marisa raised her hakero in front of her "look things are bad and i don't have to deal with your or remilia's shit" Marisa wasn't having any of their shit.

"...as you wish" Sakuya was VERY close to looking angry, but she was on a mission of her mistress nothing else mattered.

 **With Reimu, above the forest of magic.**

It is the job of the Hkurei to solve incidents, that doesn't mean it isn't fucking annoying.

Even with Marisa's warm clothing spell, or whatever the hell it's calle Reimu could still feel the cold.

And everyone else is probably feeling it too since not one person has come to fight her, it's both refreshing and a little boring not that Reimu enjoys fighting but it keeps her head in the mission.

All of this was going smoothly, too much in fact.

Then a white haired woman fell right past reimu, the Shrine maiden wasn't able to get a lot about the womans looks, but she was obviously unconscious.

Looking up se saw a black siluete that quickly left, now Reimu has two options here let the woman probably die in the snow because of the cold or pursue the black siluette.

The current Hakurei maybe lazy and somewhat greeddy, but not a bad person so with a sigh she started landing right were the unconscious woman fell.

And when she landed... she noticed instantly that the woman buried in the snow is a youkai, great because she really wanted to lose her time right now.

Well she is already here, so she doesn't lose anything by trying to wake up that white-haired woman, with more chest than Reimu wich tents to happen almost every time the Hakurei meets someone else, still waiting for that growt spurt...

So Reimu being Reimu started using her gohei, to poke the downed woman "hey, wake up" she tried three more times but she didn't wake up, time to get a little rough.

Pulling out an offuda Reimu reared her right arm back...

And slamed it on the womans forehead, the offuda glowed and the womans eyes snaped open then released a scream and quickly removed the piece of holy paper from her head.

"good, now you're awake" Reimu bluntly replied.

"that's no way to wake someone up!" The youkai was obviously angry.

Reimu like always didn't think much of it "whatever you say, look..."

"letty whiterock, yukionna" the still grumpy letty spoke up.

The shrine maiden nodded " Letty i came to solve the long and stupidly cold winter, so do you have any idea to were i should look?".

Letty gave her a glare probably because she is still angry at Reimu "In fact i do, i was going towards the source of the cold then a youkai of darkness attacked me, i thought i could win at first... but she was stronger than she looked".

And the whole situation got even more confussed, rumia attacking someone without the intention of feding herself is weird and by what letty said it seems like she is protecting the culprit.

But why?, why would shedo that?.

"letty, could you take me towards the source of the cold?" Reimu asked as politely as she could.

The yukionna stared at Reimu for a couple seconds "very well, as long as i can talk to whoever is doing this i'll do it".

Reimu didn't know why would letty want to talk with the culprit, but as long as Reimu gets what she needs there is not a lot to be worried about.

"sure" is the only thing reimu said before she signaled letty whith her head to start moving, the yukionna just rolled her eyes and started flying towards... misty lake.

The shrine maiden sighed, this was startingto point towards a certain fairy just perfect.

With thoughts of annoyance Reimu followed letty ready to beat some sense into that dumbass fairy.

 **With flandre, above the clouds.**

When marisa said that there was a hole in the sky, Flandre didn't take it literaly turns out that was a bad idea seeing as a gaint black hole is sucking up some kind of pink energy.

"how do you do something like that without no one noticing?" Flandre asked herself, because a hole of that size should have alerted someone.

Looks like someone is being a little lazy on their dutties.

Not that Flandre would complain, after all it's a nice chance to prove herself and her sister wrong she can control her power and she can use it for more than just exploding shit.

It might be a little dumb... but the vampire couldn't forget her own thoughts of that day.

The closer she got to the hole in the sky she was starting to notice people that were playing some musical instruments.

Three girls one dressed in black blonde hair and is playingthe violin, another in white-ish clothes and white hair playing a trumpet and the last one probably the youngest considering the very _slight_ height diference of the three is wearing red with... silver?, pink? something in between hair and is playing a keyboard.

Flandre took notice that even as diferent as the three looked, they also seemed to fit together unnaturaly so, like sisters but they diferences put them apart, Flandre decided to not think about overcomplicated youkai existence.

And knowing how incidents work (Flandre technically being part of one herself) those three are probably the gatekeepers, those seem to be necesary for some reason, not that she minds them since she got big sis from that.

Once she was near them they... completely ignored her, seemed to be into their music, not what Flandre expected and a little anti-climatic but it works.

She was about to just keep flying until the blonde and probably oldest of the trio called out to her "oh!, are you here for the party?".

... if this whole thing is happening because of a party of all things, Flandre will shove laev- lieavan... seriously damn that name, up someone private areas.

"yes" Flandre decided to go with a simple answer to get a simple response and be able to leave quickly.

Too bad that this is gensokyo and that shit doesn't work around here.

"wonderful, we were employed to play our music in the party it is a little weird that we weren't told who would come... not that it bothers me" that came from the white haired-one, and Flandre forgot to introduce themselves.

"that's a little odd, you..." trying to make it as obvious as possible that she wanted to know the name of the three girls.

The only one who got the message was the blonde one since the white one just tilted her head like a confussed puppy and the silver-ish haired one was still playing the keyboard happily.

"i'm Lunasa Prismriver" the blonde girl pointed at herself then flew right bessides the one playing the keyboard and dope slaped her stoping her from plaing the piano to pout while rubbing the back of her head "this one is Lyrica Prismriver" Then pointed at the one who was staring at you "and she is Merlin Prismriver"

So Flandre knows who is the one with the major autorithy between the three apparent sisters, not that she was surprissed by it "well it was pleasant to meet you three, but i have to deal with someo-thing".

Flandre almost slipped and Lunasa took notice of this "where you about to say something else?" the question seemed innocent and normal but Lunasa was looking for something and Flandre probably knew what.

"oh well you got me, the one who is doing the party? she owes me a favor and i wanted to keep it to myself" Flandre knew that saying that she knew the culprit was a little dumb and that this will probably end up in a fight, but she wanted to give it a try.

"so you know her?" Lyrica asked her voice sounding a little confussed.

"yeah" Flandre said quickly.

The three sisters tenseed for a moment then prepared to play their instruments "well... that's interesting, you see she told us that someone that she knows would come to visit" the voice of Merlin was a little to sweet for Flandre's liking.

"well i'm here so..." The vampire said and tried to fly towards the hole, just for a red danmaku bullet to fly past her.

"and our employer said that she was a blonde woman wearing a purple dress" that was Lunasa who probably catched up on the fact that Flandre was here to attack the culprit and party planer.

Flandre turned around and prepared for a fight... of three versus one, considering that the rules of danmaku permited Flandre to multiply herself making fight four against one the vampire didn't have room for complain.

 **With Reimu, close to misty lake.**

It is dark.

Like stupidly dark.

And letty was losing her shit, not that noticable but how her eyes shrinked when the darkness came, Reimu knew for a fact that this was rumia's doing a lot stronger than the first time reimu dealt with the youkai of the dusk wich brought a question, did rumia sandbag the fist time they fought? it would explain why the little blonde man-eater seemed to just have small bruises.

The next thing the shrine maiden did was smack letty with her gohei to calm the youkai down.

"why?!" letty took that as well as getting woken up with a holy amulet in the head.

"because you were pissing yourself" Reimu made a remark that left letty doing like a fish with her mouth.

Reimu took a look around and yes can't see shit "okay rumia come out i'm done with this dumb game of yours!".

The darkness didn't disapear but Rumia did show herself right in front of them, reimu instantly noticed that something was wrong since Rumia looked... weirdly calm, no bloodlust, no childish looks no trying to hold her hands at her side.

"you can leave yukionna, i don't need my bait anymore" those were the simple words of the youkai of dusk, that got Reimu to understand the Rumia wanted to meet her.

While letty was occupied looking offended Reimu spoke "i already told you i have no time fo-" The shrine maiden instantly jumped to the left and kept herself slightly above the ground with her flight, she avoided the beam but letty didn't throwing her to who knows where.

"Shrine maiden you can't face all your troubles like they are some hassle that doesn't concern you" Rumia's voice was like that of a dissapointed mother.

That irked Reimu a little "and you are going to said that i shouldn't?, yokai always do petty stuff this incident is no different".

Rumia just shook her head "are you really that blind to what happens around the land you deffend? you are a great fighter, a great shrine maiden, talent and power... but you lack character" The words of the youkai of the dusk were just confussing and annoying her.

"what does that even mean? i'm doing my job and that's all there is to it" Reimu was getting ready for a fight not a fucking scolding.

Rumia didn't care about her excuses "doing your job and doing your job _right_ is a very different thing, balance is what you should bring but you don't even understand it"

That actually got Reimu angry "it's my job to enforce balance not to understand it"

But the youkai of dusk wasn't done with Reimu "you don't force balance much less if you aren't balanced yourself _child_ " after those words Rumia's eyes seemed to darken, the fight is abou to begin.

 **Well the first part is done now i just need to do more so fuck me, i also won't write the actual fights between the touhou's because that would make everything take like three times longer, so i won't pretty sure i can make the story progress with just showing the aftermath of some battless... except the really important ones.**

 **Well hope you enjoyed and i'll see you all later.**


	13. The frigid edge of spite (part 2)

**Well... this took way too long.**

 **I really don't have an excuse, except that i was writting my other less-known danganronpa fic but that was a while ago.**

 **Sorry for the delay, and after this chaptet death battle will come back... i just don't know how many people i'm gonna make watch, i'm thinkig most of the one's that appeared in this incident but i'm still not sure.**

 **And now enjoy... or not, everyone has different opinions.**

When Marisa decided to just fight Sakuya she really didn't expect to win.

Much less for Meiling to come from the sky and kick Sakuya on the face half-way through said fight wich let marisa to wonder what the hell just happened.

The martial artist flied back-up while holding a unconscious maid like a sack of potatos, that image is something that the magician would ever thought of seeing.

Marisa didn't know what to say so she just stared at Meiling hoping for any kind of answer.

"Hi marisa, haven't seen you in a while" The gatekeeper spoke as if she hadn't just kicked her higher-up in the fucking head.

Marisa thought of saying that they meet just like a week ago but decided against it "Yeah... why did you attack the maid?" Marisa still wants answers.

"you see, Flandre wants to solve the incident and she was pretty serious aboout it too i had that look too once when i first started learning to fight" Meiling started talking but right at the end Sakuya grunted just for Meiling to punch her in the abdomen Knocking her out again.

And remembering Marisa how much of a beast the woman in front of her is in melee combat "that is nice and everything but this is serious stuff, so i'll go catch up to her now" Marisa was about to do that but Meiling shook her head.

"No Marisa you don't get it, Flandre needs to do this" Meiling said explaining herself but explaining nothing at the same time.

"...why?" Marisa was sure that there is some missing context here.

Meiling spoke "look just trust me on this one, i know what i'm doing" Marisa highly doubted that, this situation seemed as if the gatekeeper wanted to solve the issue whit the highest grade of explosive power, the witch knew that she herself wasn't one to use subtlety but throwing falndre at a problem seemed a little... exsecive.

Even if Marisa was the one to tell flandre to go for it, that was just to flandre to open a way in for Marisa, not that she will tell them that.

"yeah... or you could refuse and end up like Sakuya" Giving Marisa an ultimatum was the right answer as the Magician palled then nodded.

After that exchange of words they flew after Flandre to watch how the vampire was holding out on her mission.

 **With Reimu, righ next to the misty lake.**

Reimu won her match, and yes Rumia _was_ sandbaging in her first fight withreimu back in the embodiment of the scarlet devil incident.

The shrine maiden is pretty sure that Rumia is as strong as flandre considering how close She came to losing againts the darkness youkai was worriesome.

And Reimu really wantedto know waht the hell did Rumia meant about her own attitude.

"kay' rumia, i won what the hell did you say about me?" was the question Reimu wondered through the whole fight.

The slightly battered Youkai got up from the snow, considering her expression one could tell that Rumai was still sandbaging "you really think that all of your problems will just be solved by doing what the rules of the hakurei tell you?".

Before Reimu could answer The youkai of darkness continued "no, not everyone will have a petty reason to start an incident, and while you may be strong enough to beat them that won't make them stop, so you'll have to seal them away, but will the one's around you aprove of that? would you be okay with that?".

There was no use to think about it "of course it's my job to do it, it's what i have to do" Reimu didn't say those words with any kind of pride but it was obvious that she believed in them.

Rumia just nodded then spoke "then if i tell you cirno tried to kill everyone consciously, would you still think the same?".

The bomb was droped and reimu couldn't stop the gasp from escaping her mouth, seriously cirno?, that doesn't make any sense... the ice fairy isn't even violent, hot-headed (kinda ironic) but not violent.

It didn't fit, so Reimu didn't believe it so she decided to call out said lie "and here i thought that this was a serious momment, well i don't have time to lose so i'll take my leave" with those words Reimu started floating towards misty lake ready to end the incident.

Rumia wasn't bothere by this she just sighed and watched reimu go then muttered to herself something.

Reimu heard some of it 'poor thing is in for a surprisse' the shrine maiden ignored the youkai and her own insticts who where agreeing with said youkai.

That didn't matter it is her job to do it.

It is what she's been doing all her life it just couldn't be wrong.

 **With flandre, close to the hole in the sky.**

Flandre learned a lesson today, fighting more than one person at a time is annoying and unfair.

That is why marisa seemed so angry when the little blond vampire used 'four of a kind', and now said blond bundle of violence knows that pain too.

After Flandre won the danmaku fight against the musical trio who somehow landed on clouds upon defeat, seriously how does that work?.

"okay, flandre you beat them no need to use leav- laven- your giant flaming sword of them, supress the memory just supress it" Flandre felt like beating them up a little bit more, but that would just be mean... even if they ganged up on her.

The vampire looked up at the hole that was sucking up pink energy, that probably powers up spring and if that's the case Flandre really wonders, why pink?.

"just go along with it, go up beat up the culprit and you'll feel better about yourself" after taling to herself some more the blond blood sucker flew towards the hole.

After going through it, she saw an unnecesary amount of cherry blossoms and reallylong stairs that lead to a temlple that glows with you guessed it pink energy.

There were also thos white-fish-looking things, that are probably ghosts.

After taking a look around flandre flew up the stairs, hell why create such long stairs of almost everyone around in gensokyo can fly?, to waste of time is the only thing that made sense.

Half-way through she saw the GIANT cherry blossom that seemed to be sucking up the 'pink spring', Flandre's mind told her two things one was 'what the hell is with all these cherry blosoms?' and 'why does that three make's me feel like i'm dying?' the answers avoided her.

Then came the woman... girl... something in between, that was standing at the end of the stairs was sakuya's missing sister, the robot at the ready face, a sharp weapons, white hair and a green dress that seemed fitting for a maid and a gardeneer.

That though made the vampire angry for some reason, like someone stole from her... what a weird feeling.

Suddenly the woman... gi- let's go with lady unsheated her katana... and the other sword that looked like a katana but was smaller, it most likely has a weird name like 'tonta' because it just can be called 'short katana' everything just needs a complicated name.

Then she pointed the longer of two evils at the vampire "you're not welcomed here yokai, leave for your own good".

Flandre didn't even know if vampires counted as youkai, they needed blood not belief... not that the lady would care about that information.

"you're right, stay here and i'll leave towards the temple" The white-haired samurai narrowed her eyes and got into and stance ready for battle.

Flandre was about to land on the stairs not before someone walked right towards the white haired lady, long-red hair a cap with a golden star and a green... combat dress?, flandre really didn't know what to call what meiling wears, but it fits her.

"now, now no reason to be hostile here miss we can all try to be more friendly lower your swords and walk away" The confidence coming from the gatekeeper was something that was shown when she was sure of her ability to win a fight.

The white haired lady just shook her head "i refuse, you won't pass through here, even if i have to fight you both, you won't go through me".

Flandre felt like this lady was a little too much like sakuya... and some meiling too, probably why she is angry while looking at her that combination just didn't click in her head.

"well, it's good you are just fighting me" After those words Flandre expected them to fly up and start shooting everything without though like in most danmaku... not charge at each other in the stairs in an amazing display of skill in hand-to-hand combat.

Flandre though about helping meiling, but remembered that she has to go for the culprit... and where the hell is marisa?.

Her question was answered when said witch flew past her, well okay then Meiling could beat that samurai lady.

And the blonde catastrophe flew after the other blond catastrophe.

 **With Reimu, misty lake.**

When reimu came to misty lake she didn't expect to see the whole place freezed solid, much less a big chunk of ice with a fairy wearing a lot of white with cirno sitting right besides it.

Not in a throne or something dramatic like that, it was just a simple chair made out of ice, the ice fairy looked a little taller her ice wings were longer and her look seemed... dead but she had a small smile on her face.

That just made the whole thing even more anormal... that didn't look anything like cirno, but there were no signs of a possesion so this should be the blue little annoyance.

And it felt wrong.

Reimu was sure that this was cirno... but she couldn't completely believe it, the change was just too radical.

Cirno tilted her head towards the shrine maiden and just stared at her, if Reimu will come to recall this as one of the few times she was actually scared (but she'll never say it out loud).

After a minute of nothing the shrine maiden started slowly floating towards the ice fairy who simply got of her chair and slowly skated closer to Reimu.

Neither said anything until both stoped being at least 5 meters apart from each other, Reimu was still trying to wrap her head around cirno's drastic change.

But the ice fairy wasn't gonna wait for that "you finally came... Reimu".

It sudenly got colder But the shrine maiden did her best to ignore it "color me surprissed when i found out it was you who did this... it certainly took me for a loop".

Cirno just smiled childishly but the cold look on her eyes never left making the facial gesture a lot more... scary, anyone could literally feel the menacing air around the little blue devil "it's nice to see you so surprissed... you usually are so nonchalant even at the worst of times".

"it's hard to surprisse me when my job basically is dealing with the unexpected" Replied the shrine maiden.

The ice fairy started to lightly kick the ground like an embarrazed child "you flatter me Reimu... too bad you're horrible at doing your job".

The scowl on Reimu's face is what one would call 'murderous' "how would an idiot like you know about even having a job" She has recieved enough lectures for a life-time she doesn't need another one and not from her.

Cirno didn't care about Reimu's emotional outburst "i may not be smart... but i can see that you don't keep the 'balance' of gensokyo... more like you barelly keep the place together".

Reimu huffed in annoyance "that's what my job is".

Cirno stared at Reimu as if a She was given the answer for a simple math problem like 2+2 = 22, "you are meant to keep things from going out of control... you never do it... you just wait for the problem to come to you... you also have to be impartial... but you are doing this for yourself... to not be 'bothered' by others people's issues... you didn't fix Reimilia's need for blood someone else arranged that... the youkai of the mountain do whatever the hell they want to anyone who get's close... you are fine with that to avoid trouble... and fairie's suffer from this too... we are just stress relief..."

"but the balance is kept because of it" it was a weak excuse, Reimu knew that but she wasn't gonna let Cirno of all people tell her how baddly she has been doing her own duties as the shrine maiden of gensokyo.

The ice fairy almost laughed but she simple decided to continue verbally destroying her "but that's a lie... you just do half of your job... someone else is playing her strings... if whoever is doing this is doing it to either help themselves or to help you doesn't matter... you just beat people up... but now that i think about it that alone wouldn't keep everyone on line... so who do you think is actually doing that 'politycal' stuff you aren't doing?".

Reimu didn't answer but she did know that one person who would do that, Yukari she may love gensokyo and do anything to protect it, that didn't mean that she was a good person the gap youkai is probably asked something out of the people that she herself defeated to either protect gensokyo or to amuse herself.

"by the look on your face i'll say that i'm right... and you are letting them do it too... that doesn't look 'impartial' at all... much less balanced... that means that you are never gonna do you job right... so i'll have to do it... i just need to get rid off you so i can put this place straight" Cirno finished talking and a wave of cold hitted Reimu, Cirno slowly raised herself from the ground the cold and misty air around her making her look like a vengefull spirit.

Reimu grimaced at the sudden temparature drop and Followed Cirno to the sky... Reimu had to many things to think now and she really couldn't prove Cirno wrong... and right now even defeating the ice fairy didn't seem like it would solve anything.

Maybe she shold have listened to rumia...

 **With Flandre and Marisa, shrine up in the stairs.**

The blond team of lasers and doom took a look at the giant-ass cherry blossom that was sucking up all that pink... spring energy, it seemed to bloom slowly but surely,

"so... is the culprit a tree?" Marisa asked outloud, it wouldn't be the weirdest thing she had ever seen... it would make it to top 10 though.

Flandre wanted to ask just how many mushrooms the witch stuffed in her mouth to come to that conclussion but kinda feared the answerso she stayed silent.

Marisa waited for some kind of answer, when none came she decided to just blow up the tree and be done with it... then from above the tree a... heavy armored lady... REALLY heavy chest armour... (bewbs), slowly flew down instantly both blonde's felt wary an offended and neither knew why (bewbs).

She is wearing a blue kimono that seemed to have white ghosts in it a cap with the same theme and some kind of red symbol of it covering her slightly-bellow the neck pink hair, a fan with a pattern of pink butterflies in it, long white stockings and black woden sandals... also her kimono highlights her chest and tights a little too much.

Flandre was pretty sure that both this woman and meiling had a similar body shape, even if in her opinion Meiling has more leg.

Marisa had a feeling of deja-vu... ominous ghost lady, voluptuous, smile of inocent mischief... yeah this brings back memories.

"welcome to hakugyokurou the place where the death end up... or at least a third of them, makes me wonder why is a living and a- question are vampires undead or alive?" she started sounding serious just to sound like a bubbly air-head at the end.

"i... have no goddamn idea" Flandre herself never knew the answer and neither did her sister, who usually tried to make a cool excuse like 'we are at the border of life and death' or 'the conquerors of the night don't need of such things'.

The ghost just nodded with a determined look on her face "then i'll clasiffie you as 'alive', i'm Yuyuko Saigyouji the i guess 'queen' of this place to who do i owe the pleasure?".

"Marisa Kirisame, just your everyday magician" The magician tipped her hat like a cowboy while introducing herself.

"Flandre Scarlet, my familly sometimes call me little violence machine" said the vampire while graving the edge' of her christmass looking dress and moving them up slightly like a proper lady.

Yuyuko had a finger under her chin then a metaphorical light bulb seemed to appear since she had a look of revelation "oh!, you must be the team 'colateral damage' that yukari mentioned once..."

Marisa hided her face with her hat while muttering 'fuck that gap-hag', while Flandre just nodded while thinking 'makes sense'.

Marisa adjusted her hat again and gave yuyuko a serious stare "okay so let's go to bussines, give back the pink... spring juice and we will leave peacefully".

yuyuko's expression changed at that of a stone, unreadable both Marisa and Flandre got ready for a fight then...

"i already did that" said Yuyuko with a small amussed smile.

Marisa looked about ready to kill someone, while Flandre seemed both dissapointed and a little sad.

"what. the. fuck?" came the very angered voice of Marisa who was already making a wild guess of what was going on.

Yuyuko wanted to laugh but decided againts it "Yukari told me how bad things got with two incidents at the same time and convinced me to stop, it took me a while to let spring go back towards the world of the living".

"then why the hell are we here?" asked marisa again.

"probably so that she could amuse herself with something, Yukari dislikes stress so she probably saw a chance to get on your nerve's and took it" Yuyuko was taking just a little bit of enjoyment of marisa's rising anger, then she saw how conflicted the vampire looked and realised that Yukari might have done more than she though she would.

Putting up her first kind smile of the day the ghost decided to invite The blond duo to her home "would youlike some food?, there should be some in the temple if we aren't gonna fight then you should atleast make this adventure worth something".

Marisa though about it for a moment then deiced that she had dealt with enough bullshit for today, so she decided to call it a day "i would but today has been a... fucking treat, so i really just want to sleep it of, thanks for the offer anyway" and with that marisa flew back towards the living world.

Flandre decided to leave too and was about to do so.

"why did you came?, you seemed dissapointed of the outcome" Yuyuko called out to the vampire who stared at the ghost with guardedly like she didn't feel safe with her.

Yuyuko noticed this and quickly said "sorry, you just gave that kind of vibe".

Flandre thought this about it for a moment, she probably won't be able to get her answer by solving an incident and forget about how she feels about herself.

Doesn't mean that she couldn't try to talk with someone with... and outside perspective "yeah i kinda feel like that... do you mind if we have this conversation inside?, in private please"

Yuyuko nodded with a smile "of course" and they both descended towards the temple, In the entrance sitting at each side of the slinding door were both the lady gardener and Meiling, Meiling had a lot of small cuts in her clothes few of them were actually bleeding except for the bigest one on her stomach, but meiling being a yokai wasn't that bothered by it.

At the opposide was tha white haired lady, various bruises in her body and some parts of her clothes torn, she also has her left had limping at the side, probably broken.

In the end while both of them where sitting calmly ignoring the states of their bodies waiting there.

Flandre was just blinking at Meiling just sitting there she flew towards what is he big sister "big sis are alright?" Flandre knew she was fine but she still felt like asking.

"oh Flandre, you done with your talk?" Flandre was surprissed by this, how did Meiling know they weren't fighting?.

"Youmu Konpaku!, seems like you slacked of on you training" came the exagerated words of yuyuko.

Flandre had to admit seeing someone similar to Sakuya blushing was somewhat cathartic "I apologize Yuyuko-sama... i was taken by surprisse".

"was my fist in your face that hard to miss?" Meiling said out loud with a exagerated worried voice, obviously making fun of Youmu.

Youmu's left eyebrow was twitching "i was to distracted with my sword making sushi out of your stomach" came the strained voice of the swordswoman.

"my, my is this what they call a 'rivalry'?" Yuyuko is very amused of this situation.

Meiling bowed slightly her head "sorry if this is offensive but 'rivalry' usually means that two people could be equals, and that brat is just to green for that".

Youmu is pretty much ready to try and see how many times could you chop a body.

"but that's not her fault her traineer is just a goddamn deadbeat" While the ghost said that with a smile, you didn't need to be a genious to see she was a little angry.

Youmu feeling like she should protect the honor of her master... no matter how right her boss might be "he isn't that bad..."

Yuyuko had a small frown on her face at that "what else would you call it, didn't finish to cut the gardens, didn't finish your training not even a good bye card".

The swordswoman decided to stay silent, she just couldn't defend the honor of her master... not that there was a lot of it.

"well that's just sad..." muttered Meiling so that she would be heard.

"now that we are done, Youmu be a dear and go to your room sleep the injuries off" Youmu wanted to say that's not how it works, but knew that she would be answered with something like 'you're half ghost it should work'.

So bowing slightly she got up from the ground and left inside the temple trying her best to not limp on the way there.

Flandre gave a look at Meiling and the gatekeeper understood that she wanted privaci right now, she got off the ground "come back before dinner, i would never hear the end of it from Remilia and Sakuya... speaking of the maid" She remembered she left Sakuya on a cherry blossom once she entered here... it's gonna be quite the experience explaining this to everyone back in the mansion.

And with that Meiling left too.

"i have some tea inside, would you like some?"asked Yuyuko.

Flandre thought about it, since their talk would be kinda long she will probably need something to drink "yes please".

After that both entered the temple hakugyokurou, and their talk? that's a history for another time.

 **With Reimu, The misty lake.**

Reimu expected a fight not a bloody manhunt, it wasn't a danmaku battle cirno wanted to kill her, not out of hate just because the fairy believed it was the right thing to do.

The shrine maiden didn't care she would use her ability to 'float' from harm, and everything would be done quickly.

Just for Cirno to stop attacking and just making everything colder and colder, at first Reimu thought of this as the fairy losing it until she felt the cold, she was 'reached' even thought she was 'floating' away.

And then Reimu in a panic went on the offensive, but cirno just focused on dodgng while just making everything so cold that plants seemed to be made out of ice.

Reimu managed to pull it off, even if she was close to dying from hypothermia and on her knees looking at the defeated fairy right besided her.

She needed to ask "h-h-how...?" The cold was making it hard to talk.

The fairy stared at her sadly, like she knew she was done forever "... everyone said that you were invincible once you used that... you 'floated' away from everything... made me ask a simple question 'how is she breathing?'... there it was my answer you are human so you need to breath... so you would unconsciously 'float' away from everything except the wind... even an idiot like me could see that weakness".

That caught Reimu off-guard, her extremelly strong ability had such a mundane weakness... so this is how a reality check feels like.

... now she just has to seal away the fairy.

That... didn't feel right.

All this day everything she thought she was doing was right just got flipped and Reimu never had a chance to prove them wrong, Rumia was right, Cirno was right.

Is sealling Cirno the best option?, on paper? yes, but would her friends approve of this? some would... but the majority would see it as too extreme...

What the hell was she supoussed to do?.

"you seem troubled little Reimu".

...fuck.

The woman right behind the shrine maiden, Is waearing a unbuttoned sleevles red jacket with a cuadricular pattern that didn' seem to fit her it reached just bellow her chest, a white buttoned shirt that againts reason didn't tear itself open... you know because (bweebs), a Long red skirt with the same pattern as the jacket that reached a little above her feet, a pink folded umbrella in her right hand, She is green haired and red eyed.

This is Yuuka Kazami the fisical embodiment of mother nature being done with everyone's shit.

"don't worry i'm not here to harm anyone..." The flower master said while walking right to Cirno, choping with her left hand Cirno's head kncking her out and carrying her on her left shoulder.

"w-what th-the!?" exclaimed Reimu, surprissed by this action.

Yuuka stared at Reimu with a small smile "you're probably wondering why i'm doing this... let's just say that this little girl is 'loved' by winter just like i'm 'loved' by spring" With that the force of nature flew away with Cirno in her clutches.

Reimu was utterly dumbfounded, Cirno being like Yuuka!?, that is just a bomb waiting to go off.

She really wanted to stop Yuuka, but the only reason she isn't dead is thanks to Marisa enchanted her miko outfit.

Reimu started slowly getting in her feet, then glanced at the white fairy encased in ice... maybe she should get her out.

She started trying to slowly destroy the ice with well aimed danmaku, she may have stoped the incident but this just brought a lot of problems, mainly explaining this to everyone else... specialy Rumia and Daiyousei.

This just wasn't her day.

 **And with that it's done, i'll try to make the next chapter come faster.**

 **So the next chapter is a reaction let me see wich one's next is... Zitz vs Leonardo, well Youmu is a sure one for the next reactions.**

 **I'm also wondering if i should make more characters constant to reactions apart from Reimu and Marisa... i'll think about that later.**

 **See you all next time!.**


	14. Ninja Turtle vs Mechanic Toad

**And here is the next chapter, a lot sooner than i expected to do this.**

 **I'll try to not forget about this fic (i do that a lot) so i can update more frequently, man i'm a lazy bastard.**

 **Well hope you enjoy.**

* * *

Time has passed since the 'frigid edge of spite' incident, Reimu has been wondering why she didn't get the ability to travel through time.

Dealing with the fallout of cirno's disapearence and what she tried to do... that and Lily White won't fucking shut up about spring, mainly because saving the white fairy made Lily too attached to Reimu.

Meiling was angry, thankfully not at Reimu that would have ended badly.

Marisa thought about getting close to the garden of the sun, just for almost everyone telling her to not be a suicidal bitch.

Daiyousei slaped the shrine maiden that in any other circumstances would have blowed up the little green girl, but she had a good reason to be that mad so Reimu let it slide.

And Rumia just dissapeared, Reimu didn't know how to feel about that.

Flandre seemed happier now, whatever talk she had with the ghost princess did wonders to the mood of the blonde embodiment of the big crunch.

Even though no one knows what the hell that talk even entailed.

All in all the results of the incident were a mixed bag some bad some good, one of the more mixed one's is that flandre told Yuyuko about death battle... and now she wants to watch it.

And considering that Marisa is the one with the fucking show and that she is unable to keep her trap shut, a lot of people will come to the netherworld to do the same thing.

Wich is probably why Reimu was ready to refuse, then Lily heard about it and started to annoy the shrine maiden until she took her to watch it.

And that takes us to the current situation in Hakugyokurou... that was the insults that Marisa and Yukari were throwing at each other.

"pussy-gaping whore!".

"Mushroom sucking bitch~!".

One must admit that thet were geting creative, Yuyuko was between letting them go at it, just because how funny it is and separating them out of curiosity towards death battle.

But that's why Ran is here, to keep Yukari in check (it's basically her un-official job), so while most would laugh at a Nine tailed fox separating a witch of hallowen and a purple obsesed hag it was funny for a while. but the one's present started to feel pity for her.

"Yukari-sama... please we just came to see this 'Death Battle' there is no need for violence" Ran was pleading at her Master.

Yukari being Yukari was about to refuse until Youmu opened the door of the temple and said "i finally made the damn screen work".

The gap youkai stared at Marisa for a moment then just laughed and entered the temple making Ran sigh and wonder why did she decided to work with someone that acts like a child atleast 80% of the time.

"Marisa let's just go inside and forget everything for a while" said Reimu who really didn't want to deal with this for a while.

The magician grumbled and entered the temple along with Reimu.

Lunasa looked at her sisters who were content playing their instruments "let's go inside, we'll have a lot of time to play when it's done" the two glanced at each other then went inside, Lyrica seemed eager and merlin just did what the eldest said.

Lunasa just rolled her eyes, being (technically) the eldest sister is such a pain in the ass.

Letty had no goddamn idea why was she here, Reimu just saw her and dragged her along for some reason but this seemed interesting enough so she went inside too.

Lily pretty much follows Reimu everywhere so we all know she is inside.

Yuyuko was pretty eager to start sitting in seiza like most of the people inside... the exception being, Marisa, the Prismriver sisters and Lily, they don't like cramps.

"quick Youmu!, put this show on the road" Yuyuko is still VERY eager.

Youmu did as told, dying a little inside just like Ran who shared her same proble a childish master.

(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)

"i missed those letters..." commented Marisa at seing the Death Battle logo.

Reimu nodded, this brings back good memories...

 **Boomstick: Last time on Death Battle, the Ninja Turtles battled to find the deadliest of the team, and good old Leo used cunning strategy and swordplay to come out on top.**

Marisa sighed "well nothing good can last apparently..." And she just forgot about that one Death Battle.

"i feel like there is a history behind that" said letty while staring at marisa in wonder, feeling like there was a deeper meaning to what she said.

"don't worry about it" simply said Reimu.

 _Wiz: But the fight isn't over yet. Leonardo must face his most powerful imitator: Zitz, the leader of the mighty Battletoads_.

"imitation... the greatest form of flattery" said Yuyuko with a smile on her face.

"or just a slap to the face" quickly came Yukari's reply who know very well of imitating... usually to piss people off.

 **Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick.**

 _Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle._

Youmu at first though this would be just a waste of time but maybe this could be a learning experience.

(*Cues: Battletoads & Double Dragon - Main Title*)

 _Wiz: Zitz was computer engineered as one of three ultimate amphibian warriors in a gladitorial video game reality show called Battletoads. This accidentally opened a dimensional gateway to another galaxy. Every time the game began, the galaxy became the battletoad arena for their superhero war against the Dark Queen and they-_

Lunasa was at lost at this point and so where her sisters, who could only stare like a baby that was just told what is math.

"i don't get it" said Lily more confussed than enyone else.

"i'm sure no one get's it" confirmed Youmu.

 **Boomstick: Whoa, whoa, whoa, what?**

 _Wiz: Three nerds made a video game, got sucked through it into another galaxy, and became toad superheroes._

 **Boomstick: K, got it!**

Yukari knows of bullshit and this was probably bullshit, of the highest caliber too. "and here i thought Gensokyo was the weirdest place to live..."

Reimu almost laughed at this "you haven't even seen the half of it".

 _Wiz: Zitz was originally colored yellow, to differentiate him from Rash, but he is now officially a blue-green hue. He leads the Battletoad team with a laid back yet strategic attitude._

"woah... nobody cares" Marisa flatly said.

 **Boomstick: He chooses to go with my personal favorite battle strategy:**

"is it punching people?" Yuyuko tried to guess.

(*Cues: Battletoads in Battlemaniacs - Ragnarok Canyon*)

 **Boomstick: beat the shit out of everything that moves! And as a Battletoad, Zitz can shape shift his body into various weaponry: Giant fists, heavy weights, ram horns, you name it.**

The ghost princess nodded "close enough, i guess".

Youmu tried to say that wasn't a strategy but knew that her Master wouldn't care about it.

"see Reimu?, blowing everything up is a viable strategy" Marisa said mockingly.

The shrine maiden rolled her eyes at her friends lack of inteligence "whatever floats your boat".

Letty muttered a quick 'hipocrite' making Reimu who heard it give her a flat stare.

 _Wiz: Unlike his teammates, Zitz has used his inventive genius to mechanically advance his weaponry far beyond those of his fellow toads. By combining technology and brawn, Zitz has added blades, saws and drills to his arsenal_.

"If i didn't knew Marisa i would have said that brute nerds weren't even a thing" Reimu mochingly said, making The witch give her the stinky eye.

She hmmped exageratelly "that i have to read a lot of books doesn't make me a nerd, it makes me an intelectual".

"isn't that the same as a nerd?" she said wondering why was Marisa offended by what Reimu said.

 **Boomstick: This guy could be the world's best handyman, if he always wasn't getting sucked into an alternate dimension every time someone turned on a video game.**

Yuyuko thought back of all the people that are dropped in gensokyo... most of them endup in the netherworld after they die and since they had no idea how they died, not that they care since more than half of them are suicidal.

 _Wiz: Despite almost having no actual combat training, Zitz has proved strong enough to power through some of the toughest games ever made. And yes, the games excruciating difficulty is canon as it was specifically programmed by the Battletoads themselves._

 **Boomstick: Yeah, try and wrap your brain around that one.**

Yukari just shooked her head "even i don't want to do that..." it made less sense than her gaps.

 _Zitz: I'm the big bad mother of all toads!_

Lily needed to say this "but i thought he was a male".

Letty knew that this conversation woul lead to a horrible conclussion "don't think about it too much".

(*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) - Main Theme (Rock/Metal Cover)*)

 _Wiz: We briefly covered his abilities last episode, but there's plenty more to Leonardo. He's trained in Ninjitsu and Bushido all his life, shaping his body and mind to master close combat, swordsmanship, honor and the art of invisibility._

 **Boomstick: He's also the strategist of the turtle team, who are now all dead. Sooo... yeah.**

"fucking..." and once again Marisa remembered it again.

Yukari was curious of this, they were bringing up a lot the pass fight both Reimu and Marisa are uncomfortable with it too, makes her want to know what the hell happened before.

"what an insensible bastard..." muttered Youmu.

 _Wiz: Leonardo is especially skilled in use of environment to outsmart and outmaneuver an opponnent. He is also the only Ninja Turtle in any timeline who has studied under two masters, Splinter the rat, and the Ancient one._

"a Kappa ninja?..." asked Yuyuko.

Yukari shook her head "no dear a ninja turtle... yes it's different".

Lunasa doubted that, frankly the only difference she was aware is that Kappa's just steal your sould while also raping you... or something like that.

 **Boomstick: Hey Wiz, look! It's an Asian Yoda! ...What? Leo wields two Ninjaken swords, which are best for swift deadly strikes and are designed with the idea that a good offense, is the best defense. They're usually mistaken as katana in the shows and comics, even though they are obviously straight, rather than curved.**

"yoda?..." asked Youmu who didn't why that was relevant, the swords that the turtle uses were weird in her eyes, she can see how they would be used... but when she really thinks about it she can't help but feel like they're a mistake.

 _Wiz: The Ninjaken is, in fact, an invention of Hollywood, as there is no historical evidence of the weapon's existence._

Well that explains everything thought the swordswoman.

 **Boomstick: Like the moon landing!**

"i'm sorry, what?" Hearing Yukari say stuff like that will usually throw everyone off, since she seems to know everything.

Ran knew that this was just gonna bring more things to do for her... she just knows it.

 _Wiz: Shut up. While he usually relies on his brothers' solid teamwork, he has proven to be a very effective warrior on his own too, defeating all sorts of enemies like ninja robots, giant monsters, war-torn aliens and even The Shredder._

Youmu has found her bet for the winner of this match... and well almost everyone know who is gonna win in the room, except Marisa who will allways go for the one who hit's the hardest, Lily because she loves being unaware of everything and Lyrica doesn't even care she just wants to play music.

"this fight looks a little unfair..." said ran, an inexperience nerd againts a battle hardened warrior? seems pretty obvious who would win.

 _Leonardo: (swiping his sword at a foot ninja) Gotcha. (then kicks the foot ninja)_

Zitz jumps over a wire fence and walks forward as Leonardo jumps out of the sewer. Zitz turns to face his opponent.

"ram into him moma toad..." muttered Marisa.

FIGHT!

Zitz uses his ram horns to knock Leonardo into the fence.

The magician blinked once "i didn't mean it literally".

"so it wasn't an innuendo?" asked Yukari.

The curious Liryca was wondering what the hell even is an innuendo and as if reading her sisters mind Lunasa answered her question "it's a dirty thing that pathetic people talk about".

Yukari gave a discrete glare at the eldest Prismriver without knowing that Ran was staring at her in exasperation thinking why did she have to deal with this shit.

and as Leo bounces off, Zitz kicks him with an iron boot and then punches him away with a giant fist. Leo recovers just in time to avoid Zitz' drill attack and kicks him twice, only to get countered by a giant fist and a spiked wall. After pummeling Leo some more, Zitz throws him towards the wire fence...

"when is he going to fight back?" wondered Letty who was just seeing a turtle getting smacked around by a toad.

(*Cues: I Beam Fight - TMNT*)

...only for Leo to flip onto his feet and defend himself from Zitz' giant fist. Leo hits Zitz twice and stabs him once

"people watching this have a really good sense of timing" Reimu commented wondering how manny times that has happened before.

Letty didn't have the context to her words but for some reason she agreed with the shrine maiden.

but Zitz turns into a weight to defend himself from Leo's swords. Eventually, Leo jumps into the sewer as Zitz returns to his normal form and jumps into the sewer.

Youmu nodded at this action "i was wondering when would he fight with his strenghts" since it was obvious that a straight fight wouldn't favor a ninja... since they are ninja's silent killers better suitted for stealth. (looking at you naruto and your crazy explosions).

"because the fight wouldn't be fun" chirped Yuyuko really pleassed with this fight.

(*Cues: Battletoads & Double Dragon - Next Level (Remix)*)

As Zitz scouts around for Leo, the turtle jumps out of a hole in the wall, stabs Zitz with his sword and jumps away. Leo tries this again, but Zitz grows a buzzsaw leg, which Leo dodges.

"damnit! fight like a... turtle?" said Marisa frustrated with Leo stile of fighting.

Youmu didn't agree with her, you should never let your oponent dictate the way the fight would go.

Ran didn't really care a lot, but could see that the ninja was gonna win and most people should be able to see that, she was mainly here to keep an eye on her master... and let Chen deal with the housework, that little cat knows how to do it she just really likes to fool around it would be a nice experience for her.

Zitz gives chase and finds that Leo has disappeared. Leo jumps out of the wall and hurts Zitz. Enraged, Zitz attacks the wall that Leo jumps back into through the hole. This distraction allows Leo to swim through the water and then slice Zitz in half.

The swordswoman could respect such a swift strike.

"it's as brutal as the name sugest" Yuyuko is not even faced by this.

The prismriver sisters were hiding behind the oldest of the three, Lunasa wondered how could literally dead people could be scared of death.

"fuuuu... whatever" Marisa took it as well as everyone expected.

Reimu was a little surprissed that her friend didn't seem to see this one comming.

Yukari blinked at this, it has been a while since she last saw blood she usually just dropped suicidal or crazy humans on the forest for the yokai and left... Ran is probably right if only just a little, she is getting lazy.

"that wen'r about as well as i expected" Letty really wasn't surprissed by the result... much less from killing others she hugs people to death sometimes.

Lily didn't even knows what just happened so she just smiled.

K.O.!

(*Cues: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) - Season 8-10 Closing Credits Theme*)

 **Boomstick: Damn.**

 _Wiz: Zitz was more than a match for Leonardo in a simple brawl, using his brutal arsenal to overpower him; But when it came to using the environment, Zitz couldn't handle Leonardo's ninja skills and his lack of training left him frustrated and unsure of what to do._

"well yes... too bad fights to the death let everything be fair" Yuyuko is maybe a little too okay with this thing.

Yukari wanted to laugh at this notion "no Yuyuko, fair isn't even a real thing" it is a little bit sad how much she believes that.

 **Boomstick: While Zitz is a strategist, he always relies on his brute force and once Leo went in stealth mode and turned the tides, Zitz decided to just bring the whole sewer down. Hey, c'mon, Leo fights all kinds of mutants and monsters at least once a week.**

Reimu blinked at this information "if the fight was so clear to begin with why even bother with it?"

Lily was the one to answer "for fun!" scary how right that was.

 _Wiz: Of all the toads, Zitz certainly stood the best chance with his technologically advanced weaponry, but while the Battletoads are known for accomplishing impossible odds, so are the Ninja Turtles. Leonardo made quick work of Zitz as soon as he had the chance._

"just like Reimu said... if the outcome was obvious why even have this fight?" repeated Youmu annoyed.

Just for Marisa to answer "like Lily said, cause it's fun".

 **Boomstick: In the end, Zitz just needed to pull himself together.**

Yukari blinked owlishly "please tell me that's not a thing".

The laugh that Reimu and Marisa shared was enough of an asnwer.

 _Wiz: The Winner is Leonardo._

 **Boomstick: Again.**

Yuyuko stared at the screen for a momment then said "that was fun, let's do it again"

Ran was about to say no and take her master with her knowing that this could get out of control in no time and said gap yokai would use this as an excuse to run away from her duties... that and Chen would get too worried if they took too long.

but.

 **Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle.**

A small green dinosaur seems to be looking around on a field that seems to be made of orange grass and white flowers.

"well that's one cute lizard" said Yukari.

All of a sudden from a pipe comes a red-ish humaniod dinosaur that roars at the small one scaring it.

Marisa stared dumbly at the screen "that's just not fair".

Oh she had no idea how right she was.

* * *

 **This was pretty short, then again a lot of the first episodes of death battle are just as short.**

 **I'm also writting a Fate/ stay night fic even though i know jack shit about it, why do i always writte stuff without knowing the full details? probably because i'm dumb.**

 **See you all next Time!.**


	15. Dinoboy and Asexualsaur

**HAHAHAHAHAHAHA... please don't kill me.**

 **I was writting on space battles since i had some stuff there, but now i'm back and ready for this bullshit... of course i'll go back to space battles at some point, but this time i'll tell you guys when i do that.**

 **Of course there is no point of giving you excuses and stuff like that, so instead of that here is a chapter!.**

 **Enjoy!... or not.**

* * *

(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)

"hit play already Marisa!" exclaimed Yuyuko, extrangely exasperated.

Marisa galred at her "why are you acting like it took me months to do this?" because... maybe we should leave the 4th wall alone.

A gap appeared and pressed the button for Marisa "there, done it's not like it was that hard" said Yukari.

 **Boomstick: Who doesn't like dinosaurs? No one, cause they're awesome?**

"the ice age wouldn't like them... neither did the meteor" commented Letty.

Yukari snorted "it wasn't a meteor... i think" no one knows what heppened to dinosaurs, probably not even the Lunarians.

Ran sighed "Yukari-sama, try not to talk about things you don't know".

 _Wiz: Like Yoshi, Mario's happy-go-lucky steed._

"but it's not a horse" Lily said childishly.

Lunasa gave her this incredulous look "it's a manner of speaking... because steeds aren't always horses".

 **Boomstick: And Riptor, the Dino Warrior with a killer instinct.**

"those are some weird proportions fo a lizard" said Youmu, who has experience sutting all sorts of things... because Yuyuko has an exploring nature when it come's to her meals.

"for all we now it isn't even all lizard" Marisa here showing us how to not foreshadow.

 _Wiz: I'm Wizard and he's Boomstick and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle._

(*Cues: Yoshi's Island - Flower Garden Theme*)

 _Wiz: Yoshi is a cheerful and friendly dinosaur who's race happens to be among Bowser's most hated enemies. Why?_

"because he is racist?" Lyrica said without missing a beat, making Lunasa stare at her and Merlin to sweat.

"how did you learn that word?" asked the eldest, the word itself didn't bother her it was more on how she learned the word in gensokyo wich could be called the most diverce place to ever exist.

The yougest pointed at the middle sister who cursed her luck, Lunasa will have words with her later.

 **Boomstick: 'Cause they're so God damn happy all the time!**

"a new level of depressed... that turtle must have some issues" Reimu talking about depression while literally not having a familly, makes sense.

Marisa just snorted "i have yet to meet anyone as depressed as Reimu when she runs out of tea".

That got a chuckle out of everyone except Reimu, who promissed pain in her friends future.

 _Wiz: Yoshi is considered one of the fastest characters in the Mario universe and has a higher and stronger jump than Mario. Despite his cute and cheery demeaner, Yoshi's powerful enough to put down this goliath single-handedly. He's able to keep up with experienced fighters like Solid Snake, Link, and even previous Death Battle champion, Samus Aran._

"how does a dinosaur even learn to fight at such level?" wondered Ran outloud.

Yukari snikered "just like a fox growing nine tails... no idea" Ran knew that Yukari was just messing with her, didn't mean that she liked it.

 **Boomstick: And either he doesn't have any ears or he's really freaken' patient, 'cause he somehow put up with that whiny-ass Baby Mario!**

"it is lacking ea-" Letty was interrupted by a hellish sound.

Baby Mario cries.

Marisa covered her ears... along with everyone but Ran,Youmu and Lunasa they have experience dealing with whining of babies of various sizes.

"Youmu make it stooopp!"

"Ran deal with this sound!"

"Lunasa why does the world hate me!"

Various sizes indeed.

 **Boomstick: If it were me, someone would've found him in a dumpster after the first level!**

"that's a little much..." muttered a surprissed Letty.

Marisa, Reimu and Youmu felt personally attacked, for obvious reasons, Yuyuko and Yukari can't help but think back to that place that humans dump their 'cursed' children.

The prismirivers feel like they should be offended but decide to ignore it.

 **Boomstick: Also ,while young Yoshis are dumb enough to run off cliffs, they learn quickly over time, eventually driving go-karts, playing sports and surviving the greatest death trap ever created: Mario Party!**

"already smarter than Marisa..." muttered Reimu.

"what does that mean!?" exclaimed Marisa.

Reimu sighed "well you never seem to learn unlike the Yoshi's" mainly because she always steals, even when she is caught and gets her shit clapped.

 _Wiz: Yoshi has a large arsenal of eggs to use as lightweight projectiles and can even create a giant egg shell to use as an all-encompassing sheild._

"how?" asked Liryca at her oldest sister, who just kinda shrugged her shoulders.

"magic that's how" said Yukari, because if you can't explain anything just say magic, that how she usually explains her gap abilities.

 **Boomstick: What is it with creatures from the Mario universe using their babies as weapons? Is it that effective? I'm gonna have to test this out. Maybe some sort of Baby Launcher...**

"no... well child soldiers are a thi-" Yukari was suddenly bonked on the back of the head, legend says that a fox was a savior, preventing a fallout from happening but those are just legends.

Reimu sighed "i just have a feeling that he is full of familly issues".

"does that make him like you Reimu?" Lily was completely unaware of what she had done, but the roast could be smelled on the air.

Letty feeling a little cheeky said "i could take the heat of that roast for you, i just have to hug-" she suddenly stoped when she saw Reimu drawing needles of her sleeves.

 _Wiz: Boomstick! That's a terrible idea! Any time you'd want to reload, you'd have to wait nine months. Anyway, Yoshi's greatest asset is his stomach._

"woah..., not funny" said Merlin, a little off put that the smart guy would say that.

"more like not surprissed" Marisa always though that Wiz had this 'crazy cientist' vibe.

 **Boomstick: Yeah, Yoshi's got a bad eating problem, and devours everything in sight with his long stretchy tongue. He can swallow almost anything, even fire.**

"i see... a lizard of culture as well..." Yuyu has fallen in love... with a green lizard of all things.

Youmu sweared on that day that if she meeted a Yoshi, she would kill it just to not deal with whatever her master was planning.

 _Wiz: That's right, Boomstick. Yoshi has the strangest digestive system I've ever come across. Certain meals can grant him special abilities. Otherwise, after consuming a foe or item, Yoshi...uh...ejects an egg spawned from the subject. The egg may have special properties from said object, or contain the victim within._

Youmu doubled that swear, her master and the lizard are literally kindred souls, while Yuyuko was staring at Yukari in an unnerving maner, the gap yokai did her best to ignore the feeling of impending disaster.

Ran just didn't want to deal with that... and also was just enjoying a little how her master tried to ignore her friend.

All the while Marisa tried to make sense of Yoshi estomach and decided that it was not worth the brain damage.

 **Boomstick** **: Wait, is that how he makes eggs?! Are there any female Yoshis?**

Nice question.

 _Wiz: I don't think they're male or female. Yoshis may be asexual._

"that's a sad existence" muttered both Yuyuko and Yukari, who are old enough to not be... well you know what i'm trying to say here.

Youmu tried not to think what Yuyuko did with some ghost that she took inside her room, for her own safety of course.

Ran has the sneaking suspicion that Yukari had done bad stuff at least twice... but she is better off not confirming that.

Letty literally kills anything she hugs for too long so... yeah let's not go there.

 **Boomstick: That poor miserable creature.**

"it's not that bad, i think" said an uncertain Marisa.

Yoshi: "Oh ho ho, Yoshi got right stuff!"

The momment that one appeared everyone wondered if it will look better on fire.

(*Cues: Riptor's Theme - Killer Instinct*)

 _Wiz: Riptor was genetically engineered by Ultratech to be the perfect combination of human intelligence and animal brutality._

"humanity... allways looking for ways to commit any kind of amoral action" said Yukari with a smile.

"pot meet keetle" Marisa said instantly, because let's be honest Yukari isn't nice and will never be, cause if you are manipulative then you are bound to be disliked by just about everyone on different degrees.

Not that Reimu cared, but she did agree that Yukari is a manipulative hag, for the good of gensokyo or her own amussment.

 **Boomstick: His tools of death are his teeth, claws and impaling tail and he knows how to use them well, pulling off insanely bloody combos. And when he's not fighting up close, he can spit a fiery acid!**

"are we sure it's a dinosaur?" Yukari is sure that even with all the experimentation it would no longer be laveled as a dinosaur.

"we accepted that Yoshi is one... so we should do the same here" Yuyuko said, really there is no point of discussing that.

 _Wiz: Riptor's only 4 years old and yet, already, he's a nearly unstoppable killing machine._

"a super-dinosaur, child soldier... a equation for disaster if i ever saw one" and Reimu is an expert of disasters much to her chagrin.

Marisa wondered if this counted as both child abuse and animal abuse, and that's fucked up so she won't say it out loud.

 **Boomstick: That's one ass kicking toddler!**

 _Wiz: He has reached a point where his human emotion and reasoning conflict with his predatory instincts, often confusing him to the blind point of rage and aggression._

"a fight with yourself... literally" Youmu knows well how that feels, mainly because she wondered if someone would give her a new job, because dealing with her master sometimes... sucks a fat one.

Reimu and Marisa rarelly had to deal with that kind of stuff, until Reimu learned more about her mother and Marisa got abandoned... these two may have had a bad childhood.

 **Boomstick: Riptor may look, sound and act like a Velociraptor, but he's really something else entirely. He's twice as big and twice as slow and I don't think Velociraptors could shoot acid. They were awesome enough without it! With a limited amount of combat training, Riptor relies on his Raptor instincts in a fight. Raptors were pack hunters, preferring to plague their victims with stealth, speed and secrecy, though they were no pushovers by themselves. On their own, they usually just rush their opponent and overpower them with ultra combos, and if "Jurassic Park" has taught us anything, it's that Raptors are clever sons of bitches!**

...

Pure silence, the dumb became smart for no apparent reason.

"that came out of nowhere..." Marisa is surprissed by how Boomstick can actually show signs of intelligence.

Reimu has seen the impossible... again.

 _Wiz: Wow, Boomstick, I didn't know you knew so much about dinosaurs._

 **Boomstick: Yeah, I always wanted me a pet Raptor. I was gonna call him Barney after I found out what irony was.**

"that momment didn't last long" Letty would admit that it was at least funny, and judging by the laughs it got from the group everyone though the same.

Killer instinct announcer: Supreme victory!

Riptor feasts on the remains of her prey.

"allright then so Riptor is gonna rip Yoshi a new one..." Marisa is pretty sure about this, power above everything and... well Riptpor is cooler.

"that what you said last time" Reimu is not sure if Yoshi has a good chance at winning but he... she... she'll call him a he, has a chance.

Yukari being Yukari already had a good guess at who would win, this whole thing was basically strength vs smarts, so can Yoshi outwit Riptor? yes, can he do it before Riptor destroys him?... well she doesn't know how quickly he can learn or how much he is affected by pressure so that information isn't on her reach.

Yuyuko just wanted Yoshi to win, because glutons will allways aid eachother.

Lunasa didn't care but she will watch the fight because the last one was entertaining enough, Liryca wanted Yoshi to win... because he is cute, Merlin is in the same train of thought as Marisa.

Ran didn't want to think about it too much, she will just wait for the results... and also she is busy thinking if Chen is actually doing her chores.

Youmu is in Yoshi's favor, mainly because Riptor is just a wild beast with no train of thought.

(*Cues: Overworld Theme - Super Mario World*)

Yoshi is happily dancing when Riptor emerges from a pipe and roars, scaring Yoshi, who begins cowering.

"SURPRISSE SPRING!" Lily suddenly screamed for no apparent reason, startling most of the people in the room.

FIGHT!

(*Cues: Yoshi's Island Theme - Super Smash Brothers Melee*)

Riptor begins by attacking Yoshi repeatedly and knocking him back.

"this is unfair" stated Marisa, Yoshi is basically a punching bag.

Youmu ignored this, this is the start of the fight after all... even if Yoshi recieved more than three strikes already.

Letty knew that this is what everyone does to fairies just because, a depressing thought.

Announcer: AWESOME COMBO!

"7/10, could use some flips" Yuyuko knows about combos... and this one wasn't the best, but it's decent enough.

As Riptor advances, Yoshi throws three eggs at her, but these do very little. Yoshi then forces out a large egg and throws it at Riptor, causing a baby Yoshi to appear.

"shit on your enemies... literally" Lunasa commented, wich disguested half of the adience, no one wanted that mental image, except monkeys.

"more like hitting them with your new borns..." Marisa said under her breath.

Baby Yoshi: Yoshi!

Riptor attacks the baby Yoshi and bites its head off.

"the circle of life... just like the seasons, it comes and goes" Lily said, when someone that looks like a child does this... yeah it sound fucked up.

Reimu didn't comment in what could be canibalism.

Yoshi screams and runs off but is stopped by a Koopa Troopa. He eats the Koopa Troopa and spits him at Riptor, who deflects it but Yoshi protects himself with his egg shield.

"wait how?, did he shit himself... by himself?" stopped working.

Yukari learned long time ago that sometimes shit will not make sense, so she stopped having blue screens a while ago.

And everyone else tried their best to not get a mental image of what marisa said.

Riptor attacks the shield until it breaks and then proceeds to attack Yoshi some more, only for Yoshi to counter.

"and the turning point..." that one action aclared the winner to Yukari.

Announcer: C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!

Yoshi Ground Pounds Riptor who spits acid at him but Yoshi eats the acid and traps it in an egg. He then throws the egg at Riptor, covering her face with acid.

"just like-" Lily is suddenly interrupted by Letty.

"yes the seasons" she doesn't dislike the spring fairy, but she can get annoyed by her anthics.

Riptor roars in pain and tries to attack Yoshi again but Yoshi eats her and forces her out as a giant egg. As the egg falls off the cliff which Yoshi is standing next to, Riptor manages to break free, but all too late. Riptor falls down into a pink car with flame patterns on it with only her legs sticking out.

"now that's... a way to get rid of your internal problems" when Marisa said that everyone just groanned, that was bad and she should die for it.

"first try getting rid of your horrible desicion making" said Reimu, jabbing at the fact that Marisa voted for the loser again.

"screw you too" who else but Marisa.

Youmu is surprissed... that was some ingenous thinking, if a little disgusting when you think about it enough.

K.O.!

(*Cues: Alpina Blue - Yoshi's Story*)

 **Boomstick: NOOO, my car!**

"who parks their vehicle under a fucking cliff?" asked an incredoulous Merlin.

"Merlin..." Lunasa growled.

"but she is literally listening to everyone here swear" Merlin snaped, making Lunasa sigh, she has a good point.

"what's fucking?" goddamnit Liryca

 _Wiz: Yoshi couldn't compete with Riptor's tough and brutal visciousness, but his varied arsenal ultimately produced a winning move._

"variety is the spice of life after all" Yukari knows this the best, because when you can literally control thr borders between concept you have to get creative.

Unlik Yuyuko who just dies with her powers you, yes that basically how it works, yes i wrote 'dies' as her power.

 **Boomstick: Riptor's a friggin' beast in a fist fight but while Yoshi looks all cute and stuff, he's actually a deadly devouring machine, like my ex-wife!**

"or like Yuyuko" Yukari just had to take that chance.

"say's the one using her powers to look thiner" well that's a roast, Yuyuko knew Yukari was gonna go for it.

 _Wiz: That raptor mind of Riptor's might be cunning and clever but tooth and claw can only accomplish so much. Yoshi's bizarre digestive system rebounded the acid spit, blinding Riptor and leaving him vulnerable._

"i saw none of that cunning or cleverness in that fight" Reimu is pretty sure that Yoshi was the only one thinking anything during that fight.

"probably because it's a four year old crazy dinosaur/human" Letty is pretty sure of that.

 **Boomstick: Riptor may be smart but Yoshi can drive cars and show me another dinosaur who can do that!**

Well... yeah they couldn't thing of one.

 _Wiz: Even with a velociraptor's strong sense of hearing and smell, Riptor's confused and vengeful mind wasn't able to process the change of tactics fast enough. Even so, he was already finished._

"hard to do it when you re-experience birth" Reimu was the one to bring out a weird mental image.

Seems they are getting a lot of those this time.

 **Boomstick: Even if that conveniently placed cliff hadn't had been there, Riptor would have lost his whole face pretty quick to the acid. He just didn't have the stomach for this dino - mite Dino - Fight.**

 _Wiz and literally everyone else: "What?"_

 **Boomstick: I'm clever!**

"pretty sure that wasn't even a joke" Yuyuko said with a sweat drop.

 _Wiz: The winner is Yoshi._

 **Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle!.**

What looks like a nekomata... and a cat hooded person with too many teeth apper suddenly the more nude of the two miaus.

Ran is glad that chen isn't here.

Suddenly a gap drops her right in front of the fox "i will have revenge for this" muttered the annoyed nine-tailed fox.

* * *

 **With that come's the catfight second edition and remastered... i also bringed Chen because many reasons.**

 **Mainly to amuse myself.**

 **And since that's done and i basically finished this whole thing in about three hours... well i already had this like 50% done the last time i posted a chapter on this fic, but it's still like 1500 words, wich is hard... for me at leas.**

 **Later!,**

 **And Merry Christmass!... yes i know it's too late for that.**


	16. Femefatale the CATastrophe

**If i say please don't kill me would you listen to me?... no?.**

 **Welp... i have nothing to say but, don't try to kill me on my sleep.**

 **...**

 **As you can tell i have no way to apologize for being laze, so... enjoy!.**

 **PLEASE.**

* * *

"Yukari-sama..." Ran didn't even know what to say at this point so she just stared blankly, at the smartes/dumbest yokai.

Said yokai just shruged her shoulders while hiding her shit eating smile behind her fan, said fan catched on blue fire then she threw it through a window and got a new one from a gap.

Ran still had one ace in her sleeve "i guess that i'll have to finally put an alarm clock" she saw her actually flinch, suffer...

Yukari decided to accept this, no way in hell was she gonna beg to Ran that she doesn't get an alarm clock, those hellish things that interrupt sleep.

But she has her pride damnit.

Chen was confussed through the whole exchange, luckily Marisa decided to explain her what was happening while her... Mom's? (that's weird), verbally asaulted each other.

Reimu just hitted play, damn everything that happened.

(*Cues: Invader - Jim Johnston*)

 **Boomstick** **: Catfight!**

Letty sighed "God no..." she had a feeling that things were gonna get out of hand really quickly.

Chen blinked at that, this is a weird reason to call her through a gap "this is not funny Yukari-sama" Yukari was still smiling behind her fan.

"is she hidding her smile because it makes her seem ugly?" asked Lily making eveyone snort, except Yukari who lowered her fan to prove her wr-

"i was right!" the fairy exclaimed childishly actually making everyone else laugh, Yukari gritted her teeth behind her fan obviously.

 _Wiz: It literally is, Boomstick. Not only do we have two ferocious females in the ring today, but they're also, well, cats._

 **Boomstick: Felicia, the popstar demon cat chick lady.**

"what a weird mix..." mumbled Merlin.

 _Wiz: And Taokaka, BlazBlue's speedy vigilante._

"what the hell is with the hoody?" asked Marisa more to herself than anyone else.

 **Boomstick: He´s Wiz and I´m Boomstick.**

 _Wiz: And it´s our job to analyze their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle._

"should i even be here?" asked Chen out of nowhere, making most people give her a 'kinda' gesture, except Yukari who nodded, while Ran shaked her head.

It was always like this, Yukari would tell her to do one thing and Ran would tell her to not do said thing, it created confussion.

(*Cues: Felicia's Theme - Marvel vs Capcom 3*)

 _Wiz: As a catwoman, Felicia faced discrimination all her life. She was raised by a nun and became a successful pop-star, a passion that would ultimately lead her on a quest to bring humans and cat-people together to make children happy._

..."ok, that's pretty good" Reimu had to admit, if that ever happened she wouldn't have to deal with every Yokai that feels like hot stuff.

Marisa snorted a little "that's a pretty up-hill battle".

Youmu simply shrugged her shoulders at that "no pain no gain, as the outside world says"

 **Boomstick: What the hell? I thought we were talking about a deadly demon warrior and... is she naked?!**

"i knew it" said Letty pretty much expecting this.

 _Wiz: Yes._

 **Boomstick: But, she's a cat.**

"and?" asked Chen, who probably shouldn't know what he is talking about.

 _Wiz: Yes..._

 **Boomstick: Hmmm... do you think it'd be wrong to-**

"yes!" said Ran raising her voice, then quickly coughing and apologizing.

 _Wiz: Yes! Felicia is a Darkstalker, a creature of the night, and naturally possesses supernatural strength, speed and agility. She can also use her unique cat senses to sniff out enemies from extreme distances._

Chen shrugged her shoulders at that, nothing that she and the others weren't expecting.

 **Boomstick: She can tear into her foes with the sharp claws restin' in her big-ass paws, each several inches long and capable of tearing through all kinds of armor.**

That made the young nekomata to take a look at her retlactable claws... she never used them, then again with the danmaku rules they were hardly useful.

Ran hopped she didn't use them on the kotatsu.

 _Wiz: To top it off her tail is extremely strong, able to lift her entire body on its own. She's undeniably one of the faster darkstalkers, and can get around the battlefield with her unpredictable Rolling Smash, Delta Kicks and Rolling Buckler._

"don't even try it" said Yukari to Chen who slumped at that, she may want some fun out of this, doesn't mean she actually wants the Nekomata in pain.

 **Boomstick (Singing): Felicia, she can really move- Felicia, she's got an attitu-ude-**

Lunasa stared at that "what even-?".

(*Cues: Night Warriors Darkstalker' Revenge: The Animated Series - Intro Theme Instrumental*)

 _Wiz: Yes Boomstick, we get it, she's like Sonic. Anyway, as a darkstalker, Felicia has a natural affinity for magic, able to use it in the form of her only ranged attack: kicking sand._

"i feel insulted" said Chen with a straight face, what the hell is with this chick!?.

Marisa never heard of magic this useless since... that thing that makes farting noises.

 **Bomstick: At least she's litter box trained.**

Reimu wondered if that was racist in someway, and seeing the way Chen suddenly jumped towards the TV it probably was, thankfully Yukari opened a Gap and put her back on a sitting possition with another one.

 _Wiz: As she was raised by a nun, even becoming one herself, she has little to no combat training, preferring to focus on her singing career and running an orphanage. As such, she relies on her lethal feral instincts in a fight._

Lunasa and her sisters apreciated this... that also left very clear that felicia had no actual training, wich already made them feel weary.

"does this girl even have to fight?... seems just all around too nice to try to do that" said Yuyuko, wondering why even select Felicia to fight.

Lily quickly exclaimed "they are humans, they believe in stereotypes!".

"so... just because she is a cat" asked an uncertain Yuyuko, fairies can be really unpredictable at times.

Said fairy nodded.

 **Boomstick: But these same instincts also lead her to be easily distracted by ferocious enemies like butterflies, rolling balls of yarn and paper that crinkles.**

Chen was about to protest... until a yarn ball fell in front of her, she tried to resist sure but it was too much and she was overcomed by her primal insticts.

So she played with it, consequences be damned.

Ran sighed but did nothing, because it's too cute to interrupt.

And Yukari had her face hidden behind her fan, it almost seems to be reflex.

 _Wiz: The other Darkstalkers consider Felicia to be one of the weakest of their kind, but with the help from her friends, she somehow manages to hold her own against demon lords, spell casters and all-powerful aliens._

"the power of friendship... sure" muttered Marisa while looking constipated.

Reimu simply laughed "yes, because you _rainbow_ is any better".

Marisa made like a fish but then just glared at her laughing friend, yes the Master Spark sometimes missed... and yes that made her eat all the danmaku...

Fuck!.

 **Boomstick: That's one cat you don´t want to cross.**

Chen finally stoped playing with the yarn ball and tried her best to claw her boss face in, it was funny seeing Yukari hold out her hand to stop her.

Ran wondered why she had to deal with them.

Felicia: I sure could use a catnap.

Felicia then turns into her cat form.

(*Cues: Catus Carnival - BlazBlue Calamity Trigger*)

 **Boomstick: That chick wearing a cat hoodie?**

"yes... thanks for pointing out the obvious" muttered Marisa.

 _Wiz: No, that's a special cloak to fit her Kaka body._

Yukari seemed to choke on air at what he said "excuse me?" that sounds disgusting!.

Ran just kinda stared at the screed... and here she though that Wiz was the decent one.

 **Boomstick: Her... what body?**

Reimu chuckled "when even he is weirded out you know it's bad".

Letty was pretty sure that everyone was looking too much into the caca part... probably.

Lunasa was thankful that neither of her sisters knew spanish.

 _Wiz: Taokaka is a vigilante of the Kaka tribe, a catlike people descended from genetically engineered living weapons. Her genetics, provide her with a natural fighting instinct. She is the guardian of the Kaka, implying that she is the best fighter of the group._

"oh... that makes a lot more sense" said Yuyuko who was giving something like a mocking smile at everyone who thought... dirty.

Marisa snorted while looking at Reimu "very dirty of a shrin-" she suddenly ducked, avoiding a Gohei that almost smacked her on the face.

 **Boomstick: While she may be a good fighter, she is one dumb cat.**

Chen had the particular feeling that everyone glanced at her at that momment but it happened so fast that she may as well have dreamed it...

She was still suspicious.

 _Wiz: Unfortunately, Tao has an incredibly severe case of ADHD. While she hunts bounties with the intent of improving her fighting skill and bringing money to her family, she often winds up completely forgetting about her mission at the worst of times, often even befriending her would-be targets._

This time the people that glanced at Chen were only the people that lived with her... wich made Chen stare back, transmiting the message that she also knew stuff that neither Yukari or Ran wanted to get out on the public.

So the three entered a momment of peace... for now at least.

 **Boomstick: She has twelve retractable dual-edged blades on her hands and feet. While they´re not very long, they can transform from basic claws to hook-size and saw-blades. Damn, I don´t even want to think what those things would do to my couch.**

"claws my ass, those are fucking butcher blades!" exclaimed Marisa at the gigantic claws on Taokaka.

Letty agreed on this "how does she keep those on her... cat hood?".

Lily bobbed her head to the side "isn't it called kak-"

Reimu covered the fairy's mouth "that's a stupid name".

 _Wiz: Tao's genes allow her to instinctively access and utilize Seithr: a raw, powerful energy seething through the air. Tao can use Seithr to empower and transform her claws, as well as to execute incredibly vicious attacks. However, there is only so much Seithr in a given space, and once she runs out, Tao will lose many of her deadliest attributes._

"ah... gotta love battles of attrition" said Marisa while giving Reimu the stinky eye, while also realising that this fight was gonna be about who could keep moving while taking hits.

"i said it once and i'll said it again, Fantasy Heaven is a totally fair-" before the Shrine Maiden could defend herself, Yukari interrupted her.

"and my gap's makes sense, sure" when a Master of bullshit calls you bullshit... you know you are on thin ice.

 **Boomstick: Also, apparently Tao likes to carry around a lot of random shit, which she then uses as projectiles during a fight: bowling balls, apple cores, pillo- a pillow? Really!?**

"what the fuck?" asked Merlin, wondering how this cat lady did stuff like this.

She was quickly smacked from behind, the one who did that was Lunasa who was also covering Lyrica's ears...

 _Wiz: She's the fastest of the BlazBlue cast, darting around the arena with incredibly fast combos. However, she's also the weakest stamina-wise and doesn't have very many defensive options._

"so if both are fast... it should come down to durability?" asked Marisa to clarify, she thinks it could be a battle of attrition.

Yukari shruged her shoulders "it depends more on the diference of their speed, they seem to be in just about everything... but since Taokaka has slightly more speed and Felicia slightly more durability, so it would be about how bast said diference is"

"in other words... the faster one should win if the diference is small" Reimu confirmed, if it is like that then the faster one would be able to compensate since being able to take two more hits is barelly useful in even type fights.

Yukari simply looked at the screen "it's just a probability"

 **Boomstick: But, if you want to kick her ass, you gotta catch her first!**

Taokaka: Aah! It's the boobie lady!

Death Battle

(*Cues: Darkstalkers 3 - Felicia's Ending Theme*)

On a wooden bridge, a pink butterfly flies toward Felicia, who is wearing her nun attire and is watering plants. Felicia notices it and takes off her robes, then begins following it. She then leaps at it four times before accidentally bumping into and waking up Taokaka. Felicia jumps back while Taokaka is agitated.

Taokaka: Alright!

Lily blinked at that "just like real cats".

Chen was offended... even if it was true.

FIGHT!

(*Cues: Calamity Trigger - BlazBlue Calamity Trigger*)

Taokaka charges at Felicia, unleashing a long combo before knocking her into the air, then slamming her into the ground with her hook claws. She charges again when Felicia uses her Rolling Smash to jump onto her attacker, then unleashes a combo of her own. Felicia then knocks Taokaka into the air, jumps upward, slashes her a few times before grabbing her and throwing her to the ground. Felicia lands and Taokaka attempts to counter, but her attack is blocked, leaving her wide open to Felicia's Delta Kick. Felicia then uses Rolling Smash and moves back and forth, hitting Taokaka repeatedly before she jumps upward and catches Felicia as she gets her claws ready.

"well that got out of control really fast" Marisa wondered if all cats were that prone to violence, she glanced at Chen... maybe later.

Yukari took note that their diferences were small... so the faster one would most likely win.

Yuyuko simply elbowed her friend just in case she got the bright idea to spoil the results of the fight.

Taokaka: Take this!

Taokaka proceeds to stab Felicia multiple times with her Distortion Drive, Imma Beat The Crap Outta You before Felicia completely reverses it with her Hell Cat Grapple, concluding by throwing Taokaka.

"i thought this was a fight not a cartoon" deadpaned Youmu while sighing.

Letty was having similar thought but didn't voice them, only because the tittle is Death Battle, pretty obvious things will get violent.

Taokaka: Boing!

Taokaka has her hands on the ground and her tail in the air while Felicia in her fighting stance as well.

(*Cues Felicia's Darkstalkers 3 Ending Theme again*)

Then the butterfly from before returns, grabbing both of their attention.

Chen eye's became glassed "you have to be kidding me..."

The two repeatedly leap at it and as the butterfly approaches Felicia.

Marisa took note to catch a butterfly and let her free around Chen... it's pure science, nothing to do with laughs...

But the funny side would be very welcomed.

Taokaka slashes it with her claws.

Yukari hided her smile behind her fan, things are going to get good now.

Lily wondered what did the butterfly even did wrong to deserve that.

And the prismriver sisters wondered why did Felicia expected anything else.

Taokaka: Whoops!

Felicia is upset.

Felicia: No, no, no!

Felicia then lunges at Taokaka, letting out a cat-like roar, and unleashes a combo on her.

Marisa eye's widened "she got vicious for a butterfly of all things" cat's are ficle bastards.

Reimu already expected that, dealing with Yokai she noted that all of them alway's got angry for the weirdest reasons, so nothing new there.

The two trade combos until Taokaka is slashing at thin air, forgetting where Felicia is. Felicia lands on Taokaka and slashes at her face before knocking her back with a kick. Taokaka gets into a one-legged stance when Felicia uses Rolling Smash. She catches Felicia off-guard using her Slashy Slashy, knocking her back.

"auch... chainsaws" muttered Lily, at the enemy of all trees must hurt on literally anything, probably even more of you're alive.

Felicia uses Sandsplash, but to no avail as Taokaka jumps right over it, trapping her in a combo and knocking Felicia into the air. She strikes Felicia multiple times, keeping her in the air, then lands. Taokaka then takes out her claws and jumps upward as she performs her Astral Heat, Attack Meow Pow.

Letty blinked "so what is she-?"

Taokaka: Taokaka boom!

The strike is so devastating that it slices Felicia in half, separating her top and bottom halves of her body. Taokaka is then shown dancing.

"Ok... that was unnecessary" Letty knew this was Death Battle and all that, but seriously.

Marisa sighed and looked at Yukari "i really hate you".

"nothing new then" replied the gap Yokai.

K.O.!.

Taokaka: Nya ha, nya ha, nya ha!

Taokaka then sits down on the ground.

Taokaka: Now I'm bored.

"crazy bipolar cat..." said Lunasa under her breath.

Lyrica shruged her shoulders "not as bad as Youmu when ghosts get roudy..." ah yeah the samurai Girl can be very... 'live by the blade, die by my blade' kind of girl.

(*Cues: Bright - BlazBlue*)

 **Boomstick: Felicia just got put down!**

 _Wiz: But this one was very close; based on their move sets, Tao appeared to have a slight speed advantage. Though Felicia had the endurance of a Darkstalker, Tao's superior agility eventually gave her the win._

"somebody should pick that phone..." started Yukari.

"what?" asked Reimu.

Then the gap Yokai got on her feet and said "because i called it", Reimu gave her and unimpressed stare.

"not funny..." said Chen while looking straight at her bosses boss eye's.

Lily quickly said under her breath "didn'tlaugh" Yukari glanced at her and nodded in respect confussing everyone but Ran.

 **Boomstick: Not to mention she's got freakin' razorblades for claws! Felicia just took her final meow.**

"so in a combat of speed and durability...fire power wins, seems legit" said Marisa with apriciation.

Reimu laughed at that "only you would think that"

 _Wiz: The winner is Taokaka._

 **Boomstick: Next time on Death Battle.**

The images of a angry man with red marking all around him and two hooked designed swords appear, while another one of... something that seems disfigured under his black and white suit with green glowing eye's.

Kratos vs Spawn.

Yuyuko looked at that "i find myself oddly interested in the next one..."

"is it because one of them looked dead" asked Youmu wondering if she should be worried.

"probably..." the ghos said lowly.

* * *

 **And there it is, it should be enough to survive the angry people that would be there because i'm hopeless lazy bastard that has no future and would die of covid-19.**

 **Yes i'm still trying to gain pity so you all don't verbally destroy me.**

 **Will it work? it depends.**

 **Later guy's!.**


End file.
